|Reviews for Entwined|
| Kelly Hau chapter 7 . 5/11/2013
loved the story so far, cannot wait to read more
| AFICIONADO chapter 7 . 6/27/2006
I'd never liked Rothion.
| C'est Mort chapter 7 . 11/13/2005
Cliffy...EVIL! Update! There are not enough Raph/Cass stories! ;_;
| Ice Seraphim chapter 7 . 5/13/2005
Great story! I'm hooked! Keep writing!
| Aizel chapter 3 . 3/14/2005
I dont really like the Cervantes part much but the Cassandra and Raphael part i really enjoyed...
| Chivalrous Nerd chapter 6 . 2/15/2005
...That...was...AWESOME! Continue, or I'll send My muses to do...stuff to you... And it'll like, hurt 'n stuff. So, uh, do more. I loved it. Most authors wouldn't move the romance along so quickly. However, This is an excellent development. I suggest giving Raphael a line akin to: "You snatched me from the clutches of death, and I have returned the favor." Guess what? I'm getting Fencing Lessons! YAY! tries to catch Raphael off guard with a practice sword Have at thee!
Raphael: How boring! knocks my sword away with a flick of his wrist
| Meichn014 chapter 6 . 12/24/2004
A great story! Please continue.
| Vargshad chapter 1 . 10/1/2004
| Evil and Good chapter 1 . 9/18/2004
Ths story is so cool I read this 3 time so far!
| Freya Sacksen chapter 6 . 9/2/2004
Oh, my Frenchy-chan! Don't worry, Fency won't let Cassie die...right?
I really like how you've arranged the action in this-there is a real sense of motion to it. I would like it a lot better if, when a character gets injured, you just give it a bit more effort. It feels a lot like you added it in as an after thought, which feels very out of place. Next time, you should perhaps try and convey some surprise on the part on one of the fighters.
Other than that this is going very well, and I like it a great deal. You're forgiven for taking a while-I need to get around to writing my next chapter! Eep!
Keep on rockin'.
| kenshinlink42889 chapter 5 . 8/31/2004
c'mon. update a bit faster ya turtle!
| Freya Sacksen chapter 5 . 8/18/2004
Why, Fency dear, wouldn't dream of it. ;)
I'd like to remind you of dialogue, just briefly-although most of it is up to scratch, there are a few bits which don't sound as 16th Century as the rest. For instance, "I could teach you, if you would like," would probably be more correct than "If you'd like, I could teach you,". Raphael also wouldn't use 'thing' in the manner you've put it in.
Finally, it's a little tricky to understand how Raphael caught Cassandra exactly. It sound kind of like he's throttling her...
Nice to see Frenchy-chan in the hot seat for once. God knows he deserves it!
Keep up the good work.
Keep on rockin'.
| kenshinlink42889 chapter 5 . 8/18/2004
come on! *calms down* if u have this good a cliff hanger, then the next chapter had better be better than this one
| kenshinlink42889 chapter 3 . 8/5/2004
excellent, most excellent. An interesting pair, good mood, and an impending fight approaches. great job. update soon
| Freya Sacksen chapter 3 . 7/23/2004
It's very easy to be a good fan to a good author.
This chapter is very good. I like the subtle differences in the narrative for each character. Cassandra is deliciously in character with her nervousness and dreamy reaction. The angst with Raphael is very nicely written, though I didn't understand the final sentence-it seems as if you're implying that he already knows Cervantes has picked it up which makes it very strange. If you want to leave notes like that, sticking them on a new line gives a very final feel to it, and because the paragraph before is so clearly Raphael's own musings it makes it very clear that it is part of the narration and not Raphael's actual knowledge.
Beautifully written, I cannot wait to see what happens between the two. Yeah, I'm secretly a hopeless romantic. _' Bring on the kick-ass Cervantes sequences!
Keep on rockin'.