Reviews for The Day It All Fell Apart
J.S. Mews chapter 3 . 4/12/2008
As something of a Saruman fanatic, I am teary-eyed in fear of what you've done to him. What did he do to deserve such a pathetic daughter? Why does he have a Mary Sue daughter?

You're not a bad author, but you're destroying my FAVORITE fictional character and everything he stands for with a pathetic Mary-Sue daughter.

I know, a flame. Irritating, but it hurts me to read about a treacherous child of Saruman.

Please find some other character to pick on. Please?
hermonine chapter 19 . 6/24/2006
Great story. My first time reading a lotr story that was changed so much but I found myself really enjoying it for I had no clue what was going to happen next unlike many stories I can predict due to followings of the book/movie. Keep up the good work!
corny's idol chapter 1 . 3/20/2006
great ending!
Lathalian chapter 5 . 1/13/2005
hey, The general idea of your story is good, but I do have some questions. First-did you ever read the books? Because they never rode horses on their quest, and why would Elrond want to send her with the fellowship? He would have had her killed. And I'm curiose as to when she all of a sudden became best freinds with everyone. She tried to kill Aragon, they would have certainly killed her for that one. And by the way, the palantir ends up having a big part in the books-and why are you going to have it destroyed in your story? I thought it was going to be a pretty good story...but honestly...Its like you know absolutly nothing of lord of the Rings. Sorry if you hate me...but it all a lil more.
Arein chapter 19 . 1/13/2005
That was so beautiful and yet somehow so very sad. I thought it was funny when the husbands sighed while their wives cried. Thanks for reveiwing my story. Please write again soon.
Ms. Unknown chapter 19 . 1/12/2005
Thats an awesome ending! Great story! ]
Ms. Unknown chapter 13 . 11/30/2004
wow.. wow.. lol.. wow.. x]

great chapter.. the 3 of them fainted.. interesting.. great job! ]
Ellen123 chapter 1 . 10/5/2004
Gosh, Ms Torog, this is a travesty. Helm's Deep was a complete mess. Tres Mary Sue and some really shocking instances of characters who have been loved by many for years acting, well, completely out of character.

I agree with other writers that you style is not bad. A little more attention to grammar, capitalisation, pacing and, of course, canon would do a world of good.

Read the books carefully, pay attention in your English classes and have another go.
Arein chapter 11 . 9/13/2004
Interesting. Will she submit to the ring? Please update soon.
Eathiln chapter 10 . 9/6/2004
Wait... you killed Sam and Theoden? Wait... you told me last chapter. I'm so clueless sometimes o_0 . That's so evool! Haldir's suffering. and WHAT'S GOLLUM DOING THERE? hopefully, the next chappie shall reveal all.
Arein chapter 10 . 9/6/2004
Poor Haldir. Poor Legolas. She is playing with their emotions. Please update soon.
Snivellus44 chapter 2 . 9/4/2004
*I will not flame, I will not flame, I will not flame*

Anyway, I don't like this story. Sorry. You seem to be a decent writer, though, and although your grammar is lacking, with a little work, you could be good. I hate to see talent wasted (no offense) on Mary-Sue romances with absolutely no basis in the book or the movie. My main advice to you is to come up with an intriguing and original plot and write a story from that.
Ruby the Troll chapter 1 . 9/4/2004
On the upside: This is much more intelligent and well-written than the average Mary-Sue-joins-the-Fellowship story. The heroine seems realistic, and has the sense to know that Elrond et al wouldn't welcome just anyone, much less invite them to join the fellowship.


On the downside, it really does seem to be a Mary-Sue-joins-the-Fellowship story, and there's just too many of those.


It's a pity to see good, sensible writers wasting their ability on such overused plots.
Arein chapter 10 . 8/24/2004
Yeah! Not about the slowness of chapters but about the Romance. All I have to say is Finally! Please Update A.S.A.P. Enjoy your dorm.
Arein chapter 9 . 8/22/2004
Very Good. *sniff Sniff* I must go as I try not to cry. Please update soon. *breaks in to tears*
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