Reviews for The Writing on the Wall
Sabrina chapter 12 . 2/19
Unfortunately this story is not done yet it is unfinished!your story is good but not finished!?
Guest chapter 12 . 12/6/2019
It's such a thrilling storyline, please don't abandon it!
Never give up Elisa!
I have yet to read your first novel; now, a gothic apocalyptic setting with the death as a main character and an asexual protagonist, I simply can not wait
Guest chapter 12 . 1/7/2019
Great to see you continue the story, I love it, Can't wait for the book!
bluebirdlady chapter 12 . 8/30/2018
Oh this cliff hanger is so cruel! This reads like a detective story and I love the economic writing style where not one word is wasted. I can't wait to read more.
bluebirdlady chapter 10 . 8/30/2018
Wow the writing is really incredible. I'm hooked!
Igenlode Wordsmith chapter 12 . 8/7/2017
Hmmm... re the author's note: the story did actually come across a bit as if it was being yanked back into a previously set course in the middle of this chapter after developing Claudin-ramifications that hadn't existed back when this was originally planned - a sort of JK Rowling sensation :-(

"her wide, blue eyes" - punctuation nit-pick: no comma wanted. (Rule of thumb - if you can write "blue, wide eyes" then it's a list and you need a comma, and if the adjectives can only go in a set order then they're cumulative adjectives and you don't.)

I like the idea that it's up to Christine to lure Erik after her into her dressing-room to keep him from pursuing "that poor professor" ;-D
And it's an interesting speculation that perhaps the view that Erik knows best is the back of her head, after all. (Along with the detail that when he comes through the mirror, she can then prosaically see the reflection of his back!)

"Old and unstable and the bust was bound to take a tumble sooner or later" - an echo of the lie he tells the daroga about the fall of the chandelier in Leroux, although of course there's no way for Christine to know that... which means we know he is lying and she can't be sure.

"men like the Professor Claudin" - *the* Professor? (Is this intended as an echo of the French usage?)

An interesting suggestion that it's uncomfortable for Erik to laugh when masked, which in the case of a rigid moulded mask might well be the case...

"And for you at that matter" - this sounds a bit confused to me; either "at that" or "for that matter" (but probably the former, to avoid the repetition of "for") would seem a more natural expression here.

I don't follow Christine's logic that not receiving a letter from Raoul makes him likely to be a murderer (unless her meaning is that in the absence of the *reality* of Raoul, Erik is able to construct a twisted version in her mind?)

So *this* is the handkerchief Christine had borrowed, and the other one was left/planted at the scene of the crime by the murderer? Hmm, but then how could the latter possibly have counted on Christine's losing the one she had, and without that coincidence how could he have accounted for the presence of two handkerchiefs on the same night belonging to the same man?
I'm also a bit suspicious that neither Christine (when searching her dressing-room for the missing gloves) nor anybody else (including the police) had previously noticed this second handkerchief just lying there. Has it really been on the floor this whole time?

"Pulling her eyes from the stiff brown spots on the cloth, she looked down to meet Erik's" - I know Erik bends over to pick up the handkerchief, but surely he stands up again to give it to her and grab her wrist? It's hard to picture her looking *down* on his mask at this point...

"He could have brought a fresh one with him to the Opera that morning and happened to lose it as he fretted over her" - apparently Christine has forgotten that Raoul showed a clean handkerchief to Mifroid later that morning when challenged; he clearly *had* brought a fresh one, and this clearly wasn't it :-p

"How could Raoul's handkerchief have come to be in that room if Raoul himself never was?" - Christine, this doesn't make sense; if the handkerchief Raoul loaned her had remained in her possession the whole time, then Raoul didn't *have* a handkerchief to lose at that point (unless she is suggesting not only that he is the "someone else" who brought one to "the room of death" but also that he had brought a second, spare handkerchief with him for the specific purpose of losing it at the scene of the crime so that someone else could frame him with it). If it's a genuine discovery, then it ought to convince her of Raoul's innocence in the matter, not of his guilt; she really isn't thinking straight.
(I do wonder if Erik and his vocal skills have something to do with 'the cotton wool' episode, given that the interruption caused by Raoul's banging on the door seems to be what restores her to herself. Is he mesmerising her?)

"the cotton wool sensastion in her ears" - typo
"Raoul's hands move to Christine's arms" - typo

Christine seems to be a little confused right now about whether she is afraid *of* Raoul or *for* him... (Also, her certainty that Erik is unlikely to lay a finger on him seems unwarranted, given her earlier concerns for Claudin!)

"If somehow your memories are as blackened of that night as mineAnd why shouldn't they be?" - because the others didn't suffer a violent blow to the head ;-p
And anyway, why would they not have said so already, either of them? Because they secretly fear that they *might* be the killer and dare not admit that they don't know for fear of being suspected? It does sound the most amazing coincidence; presumably her idea is that the murderer had some kind of brainstorm that caused him both to kill and to suffer amnesia...
(And just where *did* Erik go that night, anyway? Raoul has an alibi for most of it, backed up by multiple servants (and how could he have got home covered in blood without being noticed?), but nobody knows what scheme Erik was up to.)

The only form of proof of innocence from a corpse that immediately brings itself to mind is if Erik could demonstrate that the wounds were made by a left-handed man and that he is right-handed (or vice versa).
Phantomy-Cookies chapter 12 . 7/30/2017
It hath been said many a time over, but I seriously want to eat your Christine. If I could only have one Christine for my whimsical perverse fantasies, great cracky crackers, she would be it! Even Susana Foster and Sierra Boggess can't compare to the glory that is your exquisite Mlle. Daae. I want to roll her in fudge and get her drink on champagne again. This is the third time I've read this chapter update! Ack!
Child of Dreams chapter 12 . 7/26/2017
DNA?
Arazadia chapter 12 . 7/26/2017
What a thrilling chapter! I have zero idea of where this is going and I'm loving it!
Igenlode Wordsmith chapter 11 . 7/17/2017
I've just been reading "The Black Opera" by Mary Gentle (recommended, by the way), which reminded me that one of the things I really enjoy in POTO stories is when the author has gone to the trouble of actually coming up with an *original* opera for the characters to perform and has thought about how it is going to work, rather than just rehashing the movie staging of "Point of No Return" over and over again... And as in "The Black Opera", we actually get to see the compromises and backstage development that go into creating a new work here, which is always fascinating.

Of course Christine's three days' absence means that she has had even less time than anybody else to look at the score...

"Surely the director and stage manager did not intend for her to actually undress during Jeanette's waterfall scene" - well, from a staging point of view they're presumably not going to have an *actual* waterfall with flowing water either, or a pool she can submerge herself in. One wonders if d'Arcy had thought the practicalities of this through, or if he just thought it would be fun to write a scene with his heroine getting ogled without wondering how anyone was going to show it on stage ;-p

Typos:
making a bet at who will win Jeanette's love ("a bet on", presumably)
she donned Maruguerite's sleeveless shift

"She thought back to what Erik said about d'Arcy's composing on the afternoon before he died" - at this point I was actually starting to wonder whether Erik had lied about d'Arcy's lack of talent for reasons of his own...

"Erik willingly guiding her in mastering this music, spending hours pouring over note after note of d'Arcy's passion fantasy until she embodied it. Christine felt her face grow hot simply imagining singing any of these duets with Erik"- this is ironic, given that we know from canon that Erik is in fact currently engaged in writing just such a scenario himself for Christine to perform ;-P

N.B. typo: "pouring over" (poring)

"when she returned to his house for the night" - I'd got the impression that she'd successfully talked Erik into letting her go home?

"I like to learn it slowly at first" - the poor performance has more to do with the fact that she's a singer and not actually a pianist, I'd have thought :-P

"against the cool, glossy wood of the grand piano" - ah, that explains how she managed to move *around* it; I was picturing the usual practice-room upright piano against the wall, which had me a bit puzzled earlier!

"Every nuance of his demeanor was opposite of that aspect of Lord d'Arcy's which set her on edge" - "opposite of" sounds wrong to me (unless it's an American thing); shouldn't it be "opposite to" or "*the* opposite of"?

Hmmm... with all the staring - and it does sound as if Claudin is trying to say that he wrote the part of Solange with her in mind - it's starting to look as if we may have another Christine-obsessed composer on our hands. At any rate, the unseen Erik clearly thinks so :-p

But I like the way that you're saying that the music of the opera is actually good (i.e. Erik isn't the only decent modern composer in this fanfic universe!) and that Carlotta would be more capable in character than Christine of doing justice to the part of Jeanette (i.e. Carlotta isn't being depicted as a tone-deaf figure of fun in this fanfic universe!)
Although isn't Carmen normally a mezzo role, while Jeanette is presumably a soprano?

"The gas lights in the walls sconces" - typo (wall sconces?)

I'm a bit confused by the bust of Haydn "rocking on the marble"; I thought that maybe it had just lurched forward and was now back on its marble pedestal, but since it's now resting on the top of its head apparently 'the marble' refers to the floor. Which took me a while to work out, as it hadn't been quite my default mental image for a practice room!

I wonder what Erik makes of the music?
CCranberry chapter 11 . 7/13/2017
I am really enjoying the attention to detail to the production so far. I also, like many, LOVE the subtle homages to different Phantoms from other versions of the story. I don't think I've seen a story on the site yet that played this kind of card.

My heart immediately is going out to Professor Claudin...even though he clearly is the murderer. (OR IS HE?)

Like Christine I roll my eyes at Erik's antics. Though they are very enjoyable to read.

I cannot wait to see how this continues!
friendorphantom chapter 11 . 7/12/2017
Intriguing! I'm curious to see where you go with this second phantom figure.
Child of Dreams chapter 11 . 7/12/2017
(laughs out loud)
Erik's getting jealous...
Arazadia chapter 11 . 7/11/2017
I so enjoy your Christine! She feels like a real character in this story-and it's so easy to make her all maidenly horror and missishness. I like her modesty and kindness here, but also her true love and appreciation for the opera. Very intrigued by a new composer with designs on her voice!
phantomy-cookies chapter 11 . 7/11/2017
MOO HA HA. I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE. Perhaps you should have called this story 'The Seduction of Christine:'

"She is the one doing the seducing, and none of these self-aggrandizing sops realize it."

*mic drop*

*wink wink*

*nudge nudge*

I feel like this chapter was written for me. Like, you sat down and said, "I'm gonna tickle Cookies filthy self tonight." It's got almost everything to make me flop around on the ground like a beached seal with tubs of fish being thrown at me.

1. Christine musing over her hypothetical nudity. (Hypothetical nudity still counts!)
2. The description of the opera sounds hilariously awesome. I want to see it performed, please and thank you.
3. Christine just continuing to be gloriously awesome— a delightful mix of pensive and haughty. I love how feminist she is in this story. It's so much more Lerouxish than people realize!
4. MONSIEUR CLAUDIN! 1943 Phantom of my heart! You've written him so well and the descriptions of him are perfect. (It was hard not imagining Christine as Susanna Foster. Hee hee hee.) *eats Susanna*
5. Erik dicking around with Christine and Claudin in the most "Opera Ghosty" way he possibly could. Also... the shout out to 1990's Charles Dance Phantom! This fic is the perfect hodgepodge of all my loves!
6. I wonder what irritates Erik more: Raoul trying to romance Christine or Claudin trying to coach her. All these idiots trying to woo our Mll.e Daaé when she just wants to sing and eat chicken wings. *sniffs*
7. Your prose is delicious and perfect as always.
8. Christine's porn arms as Siebel.
9. All of the shade being thrown at Carlotta.
10. The line about Christine's discomfort over the thought of singing smut songs with Erik literally made me laugh out loud.

Good crack, I adore this. And you. And this. Please include more random phantom movie references. They literally melt my butter. Oh, and please don't stop writing because you're honestly the best and I love you and everything hurts. *LOVES*
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