Reviews for Star Fox: The Mercenary War
PkmnMaster Rolf chapter 18 . 2/1/2014
A fitting ending. If you have time to revisit it, you might go for a little more 'oomph' though.
PkmnMaster Rolf chapter 16 . 2/1/2014
Well! This is turning out differently than I expected! Usually I can predict the endings, but you have done a good job of throwing twists in there.
PkmnMaster Rolf chapter 11 . 2/1/2014
Well...Team Star Wolf is down for good. Guess there's no 'Assault' in THIS version of the story.
PkmnMaster Rolf chapter 8 . 2/1/2014
...and THAT is why he left the team until 'Adventures', I'm guessing?
PkmnMaster Rolf chapter 6 . 2/1/2014
I bet it's Wolf. But I could be wrong. That's the great thing about cliffhangers.
PkmnMaster Rolf chapter 3 . 2/1/2014
Wow, this was a most excellent fight sequence. Good job. I'd give this story a four out of five any day.
PkmnMaster Rolf chapter 2 . 2/1/2014
Well, I certainly like this story so far. I wish the chapters were a bit longer, since they seem little stunted, but I'm not going to get on you for that. Keep it up.
jessiesprinklesheep chapter 18 . 5/30/2013
That was totally AWESOME!
Perchance to Dance chapter 6 . 2/7/2013
FINALLY. the good guy just kills them all and has done with it! this may be the first story i have ever seen where this happens. you now have my great respect. and so does fox.
Perchance to Dance chapter 3 . 2/7/2013
Tank, beats, EVERYTHING! had to throw that out there. this story is going on my favorites list. Starfox64 is still one of my favorite games and Fox's character is awesome in this. i may have to go and read your trilogy. love the writing style and quality, and the plot. awesome story so far!
Keiron Halycon chapter 18 . 5/9/2011
Heck I'll just review the entire story. Read it in two days and as well you know, I love your writing. What's this, Gage, married? Going to read Merc War 2. YAY
Cerberusx chapter 6 . 10/29/2010
Dam that ending was awesome.
Cerberusx chapter 2 . 10/28/2010
Whats the ndxt weapon he will use? A spork?
Shadow Commando chapter 18 . 6/10/2010
This is the fic that inspired me to become an author of this site back when it was first published. I know I already told you, but I wanted to post it here so everyone could see. ;)

Btw, the prologue is at the beginning of the story, not the end. You're thinking of the epilogue.
Foxkong chapter 18 . 5/15/2010
Another problem for me with this story is your surprising lack of detail. I like to tell everyone this but saying, “I will not describe elements you are familiar with...” is pure laziness on the author’s part. Your story is very dry, it needs some colour, some detail to really flesh out the locations, even the buildings. You do not describe anything enough for my liking and that takes away from the experience. I want to know what more about a character then their fur colour. Although this passage is small, I really do mean what I say here. Detail is golden in my opinion and you can never have enough.

One aspect of the story that I think was a highlight and perhaps something you are going to continue in a sequel is that narration that went along with the first perspective. I like how you set up each chapter or perspective by diving in to the character’s mind and letting us swim around it for a few paragraphs. It was intriguing and you had a knack for it that allowed for fleshing out the characters that got this opportunity. I just really enjoyed those sequences, it was just a neat way to setup each chapter or character’s position and it added depth to each chapter.

Getting down to the wire now but a notable chapter to me was the one where Star Wolf was killed off although in an over the top fashion it was a great read at times. Overall, I like the premise of the story and the constant intensity of it. I wish there were more moments to flesh out the characters but the plot stole the show mostly, at least in the beginning. It is fun to think about this after reading ODA but you definitely have improved and I can see where those transitions have begun. I think the way you told this story was great and was a highlight for me but it lacked a certain clarity. I still enjoyed the story and I would like to see what you do with this world next.

See you later.
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