|Reviews for Flames of Ice|
| Biohazard chapter 2 . 9/26/2004
Ah~~ finally an update~ T_T (
| Tankred chapter 2 . 9/26/2004
Oh dear. Be very afraid of the Flame Alchemist when he's bored.
| Sinister Tomato chapter 2 . 9/25/2004
Okay, NOW it's easier to tell if any of the characters are OOC...
Fury: nope. Actually, you added something that would completely fit him. Although, how anyone could channel Armstrong's spirit while the man is still alive is beyond my knowledge...
Hawkeye: Nope. Pretty normal. Just about everything you'd expect from her.
Ed and Al: Not at all. You've got it down good for them. Makes sense. And judging by what Mustang uses for his code, they would freak out.
Roy: No. Anyone would be bored in a hospital. And they would of course resolve to counting the dots on the ceiling or whatever is on the ceiling.
I'm confused by the very last line. _ I await to find out what that means.
The idea that each alchemist has a certain kind of faint energy about them is interesting. Even more so to describe an abnormal imbalance to that energy as "wrong". Or as Ed put it, "reeks of someone's alchemy".
Nice chapter. Not great but it's fine. Update soon. Or better yet, update well. _
| Jintachi chapter 2 . 9/24/2004
~oogle, oogle~ ...you're so mean...to leave it off on that type of ending! How rude... Oh well...I avidly await your next update. And I swear, it better be soon! Or else I might die of anticipation...
| Jintachi chapter 1 . 9/19/2004
I loved it! I can't wait to see what you do next! I await your next update with much anticipation! (in other words, you better update soon or else... )
| Sirith chapter 1 . 9/18/2004
*squee* ROY! *huggles Roy plushie* Wow, I loved this chappie! But than again I love anything where Roy is mentioned _ (so my friends tell me)
This was a great start, I'm sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for an update.
No constructive criticism here, I'm not good at telling people what they could do to make it better.
| ChiptuneImpulse chapter 1 . 9/17/2004
Must be Scar or Kimbley
Kimbley is the bombing alchemist
Good story please keep it up!
| Mikomi's Pen chapter 1 . 9/17/2004
Oh, my. I'm already quite hooked, I must confess. Just...wow.
| steelphoenix chapter 1 . 9/17/2004
I like the dynamic of this story: the tension, the characterisation, and the descriptions all tie together nicely.
The only problem is that you didn't name Roy's attacker. While it's good to have a mystery, if we know who the guy is, we can automatically associate their personality with what they do, and this gives a deeper understanding of their actions.
| orlha chapter 1 . 9/17/2004
ack! Roy~ *super likes Roy* I see an indication of edward?
| Artemis Obscure chapter 1 . 9/16/2004
good start, only it was mean of you to leave it on a cliffhanager.
loved the riza/roy dynamics. please update soon!
| Biohazard chapter 1 . 9/16/2004
Oh my god! The suspense is killing me! Please update soon!
P.S. Sorry that I couldn't give any constructive comments, as I'm more of an artist than a writer... T_T
| Sinister Tomato chapter 1 . 9/16/2004
Nice and all, but please explain who the mystery dude is soon. Doesn't do when the readers don't know what the identity of the attacker(s) is.
And you are right. The way the series is going on right now, this wouldn't fit in the timeline. However, this is okay in it's own right. Out of curiosity, what episode have you seen up to?
Eh...This phrase "You're gonna burn, Flame. Gonna burn." Including the implied array the mystery dude drew on Mustang's chest...Along with this phrase 'She could already feel the heat of a fever pouring off him in waves.' Correct me if I'm wrong, but the mystery dude gave him a mysterious fever of some sort and now he's going to be cooked from the inside because of it? Just a theory. Forgive me. I'm bored so I read it more than once.
As for any constructive criticism...Well, not much. Maybe the chapters should be a little longer but it's about right anyway so don't bother on that too often. Nothing about the characterization is actually off but it's not easy to tell yet until you get more characters out here. And I'm sure you know this already, but when you get to putting info on the mystery dude, include plenty of details. And give him a few good reasons to hate Mustang. Perhaps a reason not so completely related to the actual war. Something on a more personal basis would do good.
I hope my "constructive criticism" was even a least bit helpful. I'll most likely have more when you post your next chapter. Bring out the rest of characters first and then it'll be easier to see if your doing justice to the characterizations. Until then, later.