|Reviews for The End of Servitude|
| Guest chapter 9 . 7/29/2012
| Capiorcorpus chapter 2 . 4/26/2007
i am pretty sure and everything i have ever read confirms this and i don't know if you changed this willingly, but amazons didn't have husbands, when they wanted childrem they left for a short while and came back from mating with a man if they had a girl they kept her if they had a boy they sent it to live with their father, you mentioned arlia's father and i wasn't sure if you knew this sorry if this was too harsh
| airis-mcs chapter 9 . 7/13/2006
I love your story! I hope you are able to finish it someday, I would love to read the rest of it.
Anyways, keep up the good work!
| LiliAnn Jackson chapter 9 . 8/22/2005
please update this is excellent
| AccountKiller2948750293 chapter 5 . 7/6/2005
Many authors beg for reviews, good and bad, because constructive criticism is better than nothing. I hope you are such a writer, for I have a few suggests to make. When introducing characters, we are tempted to describe exactly how they look in our minds (hair color, length, details of the face, etc.) and to spell out their personalities immediately. It is an easy trap to fall into. Unfortunately, it does not read well on paper. The best way to explain your characters are through what they say and do. As a writer, try to use as little naration as possible, using dialogue, thought, and action to build up characters. It makes them more believable and solid. Secondly, Arlia has a few conflicting points to her. You first give the image of a girl who holds her emotions in with tight reins, who bottles everything up and is a very strong character. Unfortunately, this does not come across in how she speaks. She gives away very personal information and shows such vulnerability to complete strangers. She often says things that when read sound like whining. For example, she tells Lancelot that her father carved the dagger for her. That is an intimate revelation and it shows sadness, one might even say weakness. Another example, she often complains that she has no home and no land. These are self-pitying thoughts, bordering on whining. And yet again, she says this to complete strangers, to people she obviously doesn't trust. I am sorry if my reflections seem harsh, but I hope that you will take them as they are meant to be taken - as options for improved writing, as ways to truly develop your talents as a writer (which are obviously present). I do respect your plotline, although a little hastily presented, it is unique and contains a valuable originalities. I enjoy the history you have added, true or fictional; it shows a dedication to your work through time spent researching. Please continue writing, with best intentions ... a fellow reader and writer.
| Sesshoumaru-LiL-Wolfe chapter 9 . 7/3/2005
i like it and cna't wiat to see if you write more do u think the chapters will be any longer
| June Birdie chapter 9 . 4/8/2005
Yeah! Kick his butt! Go Arlia!
*Ahem* Please update soon, I really would like to know what happens.
Is Dagonet gonna die? What will become of Tristan and Lancelot? Oh no! Will there be tension between Arthur, Guenevere and Lancelot? dun dun dun!
One more thing, If you're interested in time travel fics, check out mine. I think you're a really good writer and would be curious to what you think.
| Devonshirelass chapter 9 . 4/8/2005
Fantabulous. A great chapter. I could not help but have a little giggle when I saw that she headbutted the monk. The vision my mind counjured up was quite a funny one! A great chapter. I love the headbutting! Look forward to the next chappie!
| MonDieu666 chapter 8 . 4/5/2005
yay another excellent chappy! i hope you update quicker with the next one!
| Lilitha-Star chapter 8 . 3/29/2005
hahahahaha I'm HERE boo! Good capter though hun *huggles*
| Devonshirelass chapter 8 . 3/28/2005
Hip Hip Hooray! I am so glad you updated. This is a great chapter, although I am greedy and it was not long enough! I look forward to the next update till then ciao!
| Nitpicking Nitpicker chapter 1 . 2/22/2005
just a tid bit of info...the amazons were a real group of women warriors who lived in ancient greece. after they were captured at the battle of troy, they were shipwrecked across the black sea. there, they intermarried with the nomads living in that area. there descendents(hundreds of years later)became known as the Saramations. need i say more. an honest mistake it was, for this is not common knowledge to most people. oh well.
| babytigercub15 chapter 7 . 1/9/2005
This is really good! I can't wate to read more!
| MonDieu666 chapter 7 . 1/3/2005
hey col chappys. my computer was down so yah! it's sick! love it!
| Devonshirelass chapter 7 . 1/3/2005
Writers block! Oh no! I am enjoying this soo much, I hope your muses return and banish your writers block, so until the next chapter bye bye!