|Reviews for Through forgotten eyes|
| WhiteKnight219 chapter 8 . 12/27/2012
What a wonderful ending *sighs, wiping tears of joy from my eyes* I'm really glad that you let Anna live and Mara discovered that her father was Van Helsing. Nice story, by the way.
| Kairi's-twin chapter 8 . 4/11/2007
Squee! I love it! this is so awesome. I love Veta and Mara they are bothe so cool! I love the Cardinals reaction when he finds out that VH is Mara's father. KUDOS! I give you cookies for a job well done * does a magic happy dance and it starts to rain coockies* lol I am so random sometimes! Anywho Good Job and Keep up the good work!
| JORDAN KINTZ chapter 6 . 12/20/2005
You didn't even mention poor Velkan's death.
AM I THE PERSON WHO UNDERSTANDS HIM?
| CK chapter 8 . 11/25/2004
YO! you should really make a sequel to this, its really good. i like how you used the same lines and everything but somehow changed it with the girl. thank you for this amazing fanfic.
| Artemis1860 chapter 8 . 10/24/2004
Another greath Story! I loved it. Have you watched the bloopers on the dvd yet? It's hilarious, Hugh Jackman falls like ten times. There are more, but I'll leave that for you. Awesome story!
| elwen16 chapter 8 . 10/23/2004
Wow. I go away for a day or so and you already finished it. _ You did wonderfully. Veta lived. Yeah! I liked the ending. I miss Dracula. *sniffles* I don't know why but i always get a little sad when he dies. I know he's bad, but...*shrugs shoulders* I'll keep an eye out for your next story. Laters.
| kate-melissa chapter 8 . 10/23/2004
omg! that was great! but now it's over... oh well, great work! cya luv kate
| Dracona In Volata chapter 7 . 10/23/2004
awesome! Nice comment from Carl, and I love Veta's reaction. lol. There is going to be more right? Update soon! It's cool how you changed it so that Anna was spared. cya around!
| kate-melissa chapter 7 . 10/23/2004
yea! update super quick! plz lurv kate
| elwen16 chapter 6 . 10/21/2004
*slumps in chair* man...that was so good. I really want to know what happens, and I don't know when that will be. PLEASE UPDATE SOON! *shakes head* poor Veta. *goes off to watch Van Helsing DVD for the 20th time*
| R.S.Logan chapter 1 . 10/20/2004
This is really good. I really like the way you just incorperated another character! Great Job! I will read your other chapters later but my computer won't load them right now. *glares evilly at computer* Do you happen to have a hammer? Anyway, great job. By the way, say hi to "Vampress" for me!
| Melancholy Taco chapter 6 . 10/19/2004
OH NO! What happened to Mara! I hope she's okay! I'll check back for chapter 7 later.
| Melancholy Taco chapter 1 . 10/18/2004
Hello! I saw your story being updated pretty regularly, so I decided to check it out. Please don't get angry at me. I just thought I'd point out some things. Not that there's a lot to point out. You have a pretty good set up of characters and such, the dialogue's good, the story is...the story is the outline of the movie, so that's not bad either. There were some things that...irked me about the plot though, so I'll just say what I think you should correct (so this can be a well rounded critique and not just an ego-boost).
Mara and Veta...I like how you created best friends and not just inserted one or the other. Their dialogue is a bit too modern-sounding, but let's face it, Van Helsing wasn't exactly the most historically accurate movie. Gas powered cross bows? Not for another fifty or so years Stephen. So no harm done with that.
Some of your descriptions were a little contradictory. "Her eyes were a pale, bright green." Bright isn't a good word to utelize with Pale. Bright would be used for rich eyes, or vivid eyes, or deep, forest green eyes, but not pale eyes. When you proof read, think about how the reader will imagine your character from the words you use to describe them. Veta's eyes were, in my opinion, very bright green like an emerald rather than pale. They seemed to match her character more.
The character Mara is a strange one, I'll give you that. Fifteen years old and already a master with weapons? If you buy into Van Helsing's history that he was in fact the Angel of the Hunt, he's had century's worth of experience with weapons. Comparing her abilities with Van Helsing's does no justice for the character. It is like comparing Harry Potter's power to Dumbledore's. There is no comparison between a fifteen year old girl and a century's old angel.
You may want to take a look at the beginning of your second chapter. The small conversation between Mara and Veta is too...awkward. It just sounds wrong the way Mara says:
"You too. How’s you family?
| kate-melissa chapter 6 . 10/17/2004
oh no! wats gona happen to veta? is drac gona turn her? no! they've gotta save her! lurve kate
| Artemis1860 chapter 6 . 10/17/2004
Ga! don't end it there! gr. you are so evil! lol. UPdate soon!