|Reviews for Doctor Strangelouvre|
| KiddyCue chapter 8 . 10/11/2011
Best part of this "I kick ass" i was rolling
| Kirinin chapter 11 . 1/10/2010
First of all let me open up with the fact that I know this is an older story and your writing style may have altered so much that the C&C I give you now might be past its due date. Still, no guts no glory, so here we go:
Your style is certainly interesting. You have a strange and quirky, offbeat sense of timing which at times makes me need to follow Ranma's advice and wake up, but which I appreciate most of the time. Your repeated phrases ("Jealous? Don't be") are for the most part well-done, though it seems like they might be repeated a few times too many to remain effective. Another repeated device I felt fared better was the dream of everything burning around Kasumi; I thought that worked out quite well, very evocative.
Overall, it almost seems like this story is a little too long. The unique voice and the odd plot kept me engaged up until now, but I feel like we have followed a plot and a subplot (Akane's gender and the bread-fu) for as long as they can be sustained. I am past ready for the conclusion of the tale. Maybe that's a product of the way you skip around. Though I really liked the way that tactic 'felt' as the reader, it does have the effect of making what *would* be a short scene into one that is far longer. Maybe that made the fic seem longer as a whole?
Others may have found the way you flashed from scene to scene to be too challenging/confusing, but I never thought the flashing back and forth ever became incomprehensible. The flashes back and forth between the fight between Kodachi and Ranma and the near-miss sex between Ranma and Akane were especially good, even though they were probably the most challenging for me to make the switch between one set-up and the other.
I liked the way Ranma's words were never in quotations - it really makes you feel like you're inside the character's head. Ranma's voice is one of the better aspects of this fic. It's unique and entirely him for the bulk of the fic. Over time, it *does* bleed more and more into a tone that is much more like Fight Club's protagonist than Ranma as we know him. In short, it seems as though Ranma grows wittier and also crueler over time.
In the end, I stopped reading because of that - because I am relatively certain I didn't like where you were going with Ranma. An entirely subjective judgment, I know. I believe that it is within Ranma's character to reject Akane as not a 'real' woman once he realized that she had internal male sex organs, and to refuse to talk to her, and to in general depersonalize her and begin treating her as a thing. With Ranma's upbringing and his constant prattling on about becoming a 'man amongst men' and what a 'real' girl is, I see him as totally capable of that behavior.
However, as his behavior grew more and more abhorrent to Akane (climaxing, if you'll forgive the pun, with the near-sex scene) I was unable to see him as Ranma at all; or, if you like, I began to see him as the worst possible endgame for Ranma's personality: a misogynistic prick on the verge of sociopathy. It began to seem positively revenge-fantasy as well, a punishment of Akane's character... who has never been enough of a 'real girl' to suit Ranma - or you, the author? Not a train wreck I'm interested in continuing to watch.
I appreciate the time that went into this fic, and I liked a great deal of the devices you used to produce it; but in the end, it's your ideas that stopped me from finishing.
Hope you continue writing,
| 14omoon chapter 7 . 3/21/2009
U r an AMAZING author!
| 14omoon chapter 5 . 3/21/2009
Ryoga's a jerkface for putting Ranma through that ordeal...does he realize that he could've raped Ranma, apparently NO! And Akane's a dude...whoa didn't see that coming AT ALL!
| 14omoon chapter 4 . 3/21/2009
Poor Ranma, I guessin he feels PRETTY suckish for tha moment!
| 14omoon chapter 2 . 3/21/2009
Yes, I'm think I'm fallin in love w/ this Ranma...not really but HE'S AWESOME!
| 14omoon chapter 1 . 3/21/2009
Wow, I really like your style of writing! And your portrayal of Ranma, A-MAZING!
| James Birdsong chapter 13 . 3/6/2009
| Author chapter 13 . 12/15/2004
Why I pulled the fic from
I didn't think I'd finish it. I'd been writing this story for so long, I thought that no one really was following. It just had lingered on too long. I decided to pull it so that it could either be lost and forgotten, or revived and vindicated. Anayway, it proved to be the latter, and I know only a few read it from stem to stern, but to those few, Thank you. All whom were my reason to write.
Currently I'm working on my own fiction piece, and wheter it will be good or bad, I know two things:
1) I have always been writing.
2) I will always be writing.
But now the stories are mine. I don't have the fall-back safety of farmiliarity with common ground that fanfics have. So I hope to write my novella "The Three Weasles" (tentative title) to it's completeion. Till then, the account is open, read away.
| NemesisZero chapter 13 . 10/31/2004
I say that women with Testicular Faminization are at a higher riskof cancer. She could get cancer from it.
What a perfect way to wrap things up, what with Ranma casually admitting that Akane really is a woman even if he might not say so if asked directly. Great job.
Why did you delete the fic and repost it, though?
| Raisins chapter 1 . 10/5/2004
| Captain Tsubasa chapter 1 . 10/4/2004
Work on your formatting.
| oh.no.the.axe.tofu chapter 1 . 10/4/2004
Wow, hate to see you go Chenalos. This story and The Play are two of my favorite fanfics. I hope you put your talent to good use.
| Pilgrim chapter 13 . 10/4/2004
Having Akane save Ranma's bacon with her homebaked mutant bread was just perfect.
This is definitely one of my all-time favorites.