|Reviews for Chrono Trigger: The Sands of Time|
| Reclusive Dork chapter 82 . 2/23
... you know, it's always been a theory of mine that Glenn was actually Crono's ancestor.
| vkg313 chapter 1 . 10/21/2017
I hope you keep writing this!
| Ocaj chapter 82 . 7/5/2017
Still reading! Do try to finish it! I can fully understand how busy you are though. Keep up the good work, on all fronts!
| Tsubasa Fan chapter 82 . 2/4/2017
Please don't abandon this fic!
| akanomie1 chapter 3 . 12/3/2016
interesting read i shall have to binge read this its well writen and enjoyable with lots of extra tid bits. great job
| Erico chapter 82 . 11/13/2016
I'm no stranger to how life or something like it gets in the way of our writing. It takes me 3 to 6 months to provide updates to my Starfox 'Fic. That being said, all these years later, your novelization still reads like a dream. Keep it up. We can wait for quality.
| Anoynomous chapter 82 . 10/26/2016
Nice to see a new chapter. Was hoping for more, but its got lots of good character development for Frog.
I'm guessing the side quest order is Ozzie's - Choras - Giant's Claw - Fiona's Forest - The King on Trial - Son of Sun - Geno Dome - optional: Ayla Sidequest (Singing Mountain _ ) - Finish Sun Stone Quest - Ultimate Equipment from Stone & Shell - Black Omen
| war hippy fatigues chapter 82 . 10/23/2016
It's cool to see this is still going! This is definitely one of the best stories I've read on this site and it being unfinished always felt like a minor injustice.
| patattack chapter 82 . 10/23/2016
Nice chapter. Liked how Glenn convinced the king to see things differently, especially that line about being no different than them. And that part with Eliza was cute. :-)
Frankly I'm surprised you had the time to write this, cause it seems like you're busy enough already. Best of luck!
| Mugen Kagemaru chapter 82 . 10/23/2016
Glad to see this updated again. We've all come a long way since the last one.
| Unclever title chapter 82 . 10/23/2016
Well now isn't this a blast from the past! Looking at this it's almost as if the story just hopped on a time machine and rocketed off to the future which has now become the present. And it's as good as ever.
I still love this story. Thanks for the new chapter!
| filisapin chapter 81 . 8/17/2016
I cannot believe this story is actually still on the run despite its age. And almost 12 years, too! I deeply regretted coming to this fandom just recently. I love how you depicted Magus in here. Please do update more~ Oh, and good luck on your marriage life~
| Ganheim chapter 26 . 7/4/2016
There are two types of mentalities in this world: optimism and pessimism
[And realism. And pragmatism…]
A pessimist is incredibly real and logical
[Whose thoughts are these? We need a who and where to set the scene and we don’t have any for this. Without a character voice, we’re being lectured by the writer]
no reason to be happy or expect things to change
[And yet people did even in the midst of the Black Death]
problems have been absolved
[Sins can be absolved, problems are solved]
force feeling into their legs
[Will can force movement into working muscles, but feeling is an internal neural working not dependent on will]
realized that Marle was
[Telling, skip to the showing]
made it the last time we tried anything
[They haven’t encountered Lavos yet, they don’t know particulars of what they face]
It would be best to
[No, don’t Tell us. Especially when you’re throwing presumptions at us, if you want world-details then give them from a character so you develop both the character and worldsetting. The classist presumption you make for Nadia and Lucca is classist to an insulting degree. Don’t tell us how great nobles are, tell us how altruistic *Nadia* is]
heart of a leader that had been carefully crafted since her birth
[The education to get away with Insider Trading in the Stock Market, and order thousands of serfs to their deaths as conscripts in ego-motivated wars to show off against other nobles?]
silence…broken by the…wind
[wind is not silent. “leaving only the howl of the wind” might be what you’re looking for]
[ Snakes can’t close their eyes]
cobwebs were thick…abandoned long ago
[How would they know? Spotting a spider is difficult in good circumstances]
but I will do so anyway
[Show, don’t Tell. Also keep the focalization to character so you don’t slip into Author Intrusion]
were placed in evenly spaced places
webs in its wake
[ The portal doesn’t have a wake, it’s not moving]
which I have said
However, his hands
[This whole segment is unnecessary repetition]
It was truly
[Author intrusion? Not character-focal. Also doesn’t ground us in the scene (which is important in a time/dimension hopping story), but as you directly continue the previous scene I don’t think the scene separator should be there. Taking away the Author Intrusive Telling would help]
that she fully inspected
[Passive, wordy, and about 1.5 pages after they enter Robo’s room]
it was in decent shape…it was in deplorable condition
[This is why you avoid Telling when you can show. This disagreement is in the same paragraph, and your shown description is clear it’s in bad shape]
repaired ages ago, only it had not been started
[I have no clue what this means]
"What if it
[Do not EVER start a scene with dialog. Set the stage: the where, then when (in a time-traveling/hopping story), and the who. This could be generals looking at a mystic in the “modern day”, or cavemen hunters looking at a catatonic reptite]
It works on UGEE
[Then Prometheus would collapse, unpowered, when they went to the BC era before Lavos falls]
gears began to whirl (…silenced them
[So is it audible to the characters or not? You’re being confusing. Remember to focus on descriptions that a focal character can perceive and you’ll keep a much more consistent scene]
stood on its feel
machine was blocky and seemed stiff…moved with an effortless grace
fingers being pulled by gears and such the same way tendons
[Tendons are corded material, gears are small rotating fixtures]
sincere apology. "I must apologize
[Telling is repetitious]
I shall go by X
[That’s not in the game script. I applaud you]
detonate a weapon of mass destruction
[Directed explosives designed to breach specific sections of fortifications are older than firearms. “shaped charges” or at least ‘specialized explosives’ would be required, a weapon of mass destruction would be overkill and a robot from the era would know that]
supply the pumps
[There are pumps now?]
forgot what Robo said his series was
[There’s always that internet thing you’re posting this story on. Or the classic fallback: T-800]
I like the idea of a novelization. You succeed in giving the characters distinct personalities and use the canon as more of a guide than chain, so things still felt fresh even though we saw the same mile markers. However, you have so much Telling Not Showing that I can't overlook those (especially when they become monologues that may be pages long and can't come from a character) and the passive sentence construction that lots of new writers struggle with.
| Sarah chapter 81 . 3/11/2016
Good story I just tried to power through it in a few days and I enjoyed it immensely. I hope everything is going alright as I see it's been a while since an update. It's rather interesting to see the evolution of writing from the first chapter to this one. It makes me wonder how you'll handle the Fiona sidequest or the mother brain one with Robo, and I've been loving the hints with the thing with Marle's little arc with her father and the chancellor.
| Guest chapter 81 . 3/3/2016
Please continue this awesome tale, this is the best CT story on here