Reviews for Crimson Sister
sarista wow chapter 1 . 4/13
I read this fic years ago now and it made an incredible impact at the time as easily one of the best and most evocative stories I'd ever read and coming back to it now that fact has not changed in the slightest. If anything I can appreciate it even more now.

The descriptions, flow, tone all of it was fantastic, but what really got me was the world building and character perspectives.

This image of Vegeta matches up so well with what little we got to see and Vegeta's "Sayian is always superior" attitude and it's clear to see how such a giant collective ego and desperation for power and control has damaged their ability to function as a species. There's both a sense tensions, and an almost melancholic emptiness to the world they live in where extinction is imminent and barely anyone has freedom. This was particularly well handled by just how broken their method of hunting the Crimson Sister was and by the mere existence of the Collector.

And of course the sexism is completely unsurprising and came across disgustingly but also, based on our worlds history, believably, the double standards, the abuse and even the degree of internalisation for such a horrendous broken system really helped set the tone for this piece which was both immersive and heartbreaking.

The idea of wars and extinction through this method was extremely unique, but again based on what we have seen very believable. I also found the added strategic details, escape pods, the battle ships and that fire (amazing and awesome in a lot of different ways) were well thought out and interesting.

But a great story needs great characters, and each perspective used brought something interesting to the table which helped build the world, and set the tone of the story perfectly.

I honestly don't know where to start, Crimson Sister easily stood out as my favourite, but I kind of want finish this review focussing on her, so I will.

Goku and Radit's mother was a heartbreaking but well executed perspective who clearly demonstrated exactly how awful the world is to live in and how it could create someone like the Crimson Sister. Not only that but I found her lack of a name (assuming I didn't miss something) rather demonstrative of the Sayians woeful treatment of women, along with stuff like her not knowing the father and the list being (shudder) long. The idea of her praying to the Crimson Sister was a fascinating one, in another setting CS might have become a god because of it, and her own kindness to her 'little sister' and her welcoming it was brilliantly executed.

The collector was every bit as callous and indifferent as a Sayian bound tightly to the rigid and broken system can be expected to be and his treatment of everyone around him bore that out. The inspector had an almost noir-ish quality to him and his bitter, but subdued realization about on coming extinction was well handled as was his turning on the Collector because 'why not?' The guards were also a nice touch, and a good way to work in a humanising aspect to the Sayians in a believable manner. His comparison to wanting a brother, or a dog, was a clever one and his decision to honour his obligations well handled. A little curious who the other one is the pod was. I know what King Vegeta tried, and I assume the psychic was Bardock, was it the inspector or someone else? The reaction to that was also rather fitting.

And finally the star of the hour. The Crimson Sister was a compelling and fascinating character, a shadowy enigma that hovered on the borders for much of the story even when we saw things from her perspective. Yet we learn so much about her and her past, the build up and framing of her legend was excellent and evocative and I loved her interaction with her 'little sister' her mercy killing of them and the acceptance of it really strikes a cord and also fits well into the existing culture with their 'suicide is terrible but being killed is fine' sort of thing. I rather liked her shrug off, of Goku as irrelevant to her plans and it showed she wasn't completely driven by her, perfectly understandable, rage.

Her & everyone's reaction to the oncoming destruction and the description for it was really well done and I liked her own anger at how everything she'd worked for was implicitly rendered moot because an outsider felt like it. So her decision, the thought process behind it and how she carried it out was impressive and honestly kind of badass, I mean, just opting to burn the whole city and kill anything left over despite an allegedly low Ki, that's all kinds of gutsy. But also smart, something which I very much appreciated, her patient, meticulous killing has been spinning the wheels of Sayian history, regardless of whether the ones in charge realize or want to admit it, for decades and if not for Frieza would have seen their demise at her hand. I confess some part of me kind of wanted her to escape as well Her final curse of Goku was a powerful ending and the imagery it conjures to mind is powerful. She was an amazing character and her thought process was fascinating to read.

So overall great story, sorry for gushing so much
NeonStar89 chapter 1 . 9/11/2011
Interesting little piece. It's got a couple of elements in it that I had planned to integrate into my own story, i.e. a civil war amongst the Saiyans (though not for the same reason) and the burning of the dead. Thoroughly enjoyed reading it!

Esplandian chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
I normally do not read anything with saiyans in it if I can avoid it (specially with Vegeta), yet I found this one to be very interesting. It even made sense, with Crimson Sister, Collector and all.
Fujiko Kuwabara chapter 1 . 1/2/2009
This was one of the most intense stories that I've read in a long, long time. It was absolutely amazing! It was so dark and it had a slight "Grimm fairy-tales" type feel to it. Again, I have to say it's intense. It was wonderful and it has become a favorite of mine.:)
Sailor Pandabear chapter 1 . 7/26/2006
Crimson Sister was really crazy... If she hated the laws. she should have gathered a big number of women, perhaps asked the help of other ally species, and started a rebellion, refusing any contact with saiyan men until the lwas were changed.

very disturbing but good
okusama chapter 1 . 3/13/2005
Fantastic! I haven't enjoyed a fic so much in a long time.
Dyth chapter 1 . 1/17/2005
God fic. The grammar, however, needs work. Where are the possessives, for instance?
Acey Dearest chapter 1 . 1/15/2005
Wow. Basically, that's about all I can say and be coherant, unfortunately.

I love the description, so dark, heavy, that I could imagine everything. It all makes such perfect sense that it's amazing.

Crimson Sister is psychotic, but really interesting, chilling. Trying to kill off the race...

I just wish I knew what else to say. As it is I can only think of wonderful, wonderful job.



sweetjex chapter 1 . 1/11/2005
This was excellent. No, really, it was. I have never read anything like this. Very original, very engaging.

This is definitely 'favorite stories' material. :)

Please do a service to the whole fanfiction community and KEEP WRITING! haha
The Sh33p chapter 1 . 1/8/2005
... Just when I thought there were no more DBZ fics Id enjoy reading now that Ive become entrenched in Zoids, Naruto and a few dozen others, you waltz up, yank me around by my w00l and smack the living crap out of me with this.

I think I can sum up my feelings for this in two simple words: Bleedin hell! o.o!

Yeah. Definately not your usual tongue-in-cheek/slapstick humor-meets-action/adventure-meets-serious drama-type stories, Dora. Even though its off the beaten path from what Ive come to expect of your writings though, this is definately a good fic. Seeing Saiyan society portrayed like that was all but disgusting to me, but at the same time... I could still understand it. While I didnt particularly like it, I could still understand it. It made me think. It made me consider just how bad things mayve been.

One of the things I DID particularly enjoy about your portrayal of Saiyan society is their lack of forensics technology because of how egomaniacal they all are. Its not because its probably true(and given what we saw of them, it most likely is), its because you took such a miniscule detail that most people take for granted unless SPECIFICALLY writing a crimestory set pre-series, and brought it into the limelight without focusing the entire story on it.

As for the characters...

For a few paragraphs, I had actually wondered if the one tucking Goku into his space pod was Radditz. Then you had the Crimson Sister off the poor little bastard and it occurred to me that Radditz had, somehow, already managed to escape in that pod from earlier. Then again, maybe that wasnt him, but either way...

It makes me wonder how he managed to survive even though his species was annihilated. Was he a coward who fled for his life on some hunch? Did he overhear a transmission from someone on Freezas flagship trying to warn a friend on Vegeta and decide to book it? Did someone with a sense of genuine charity just fling him in a pod? Or maybe he was just off-world at the time on a mission and happened to come back as the sole survivor?

And then you have the title character... Crimson Sister herself. Damn I liked her. She essentially did a number of things all at the same time. First off, she took the 'black-and-white' views you get of most DBZ villians, turned it on its ear and painted it grey after a sound beating. Or maybe red would be a better color, but still. She brought home the fact that, in reality, its always just a matter of varying shades of grey. After that, she brought home the fanatical nature of any true zealot. Not only did she believe what she was doing was right in the grand scheme of things, she had absolutely NO internal conflicts with killing innocent victims to do it. In essence, she rationalized her murders as setting her sisters free. She didnt bother trying to change a system that couldnt be saved, she just systematically destroyed it at its own stagnant, self-perpetuated achilles heel.

Those things, more so than anything else that you couldve done with her, made this woman a hardcore badass to the extreme. It didnt matter that she was physically weak or maybe even just older than all hell. She had determination, patience and ruthlessness that put Goku, Piccolo and Vegeta all to shame.

All in all, I have to say that this is one of your better works, Dora. Considering that you churn out the good stuff more often than almost any other author Ive ever known, thats saying something.
Natsu chan chapter 1 . 1/5/2005
I notice while I was reading this you up loaded a few more fics ...

Oh yes very, very good, and a crafty insertion of our good friend Son Gokou. Nicely done not too over the top at all and with just enough tension. Not only that it's reasonably credable, which isn't exactly common in DBZ fiction. It's intreging too. Who is the crimson sister? Springs to mind.

This fic does mesh rather well with the image the of Saiyan culture that Vegeta give us. Well done!
add22 chapter 1 . 1/5/2005
This story by far falls into one of the very best I have ever read. I am being serious.

I know it is a one shot, but it is so well laid out. Your writing style is astounding, and graceful, your thoughts seem to be well conveyed, I hope you continue writing always.
Jay FicLover chapter 1 . 1/4/2005



It was SO good, so filled with emotion! I absolutely loved it!

Crimson Sister was really crazy... If she hated the laws. she should have gathered a big number of women, perhaps asked the help of other ally species, and started a rebellion, refusing any contact with saiyan men until the lwas were changed.

It would really be interesting if you decided to write the basics of the story of how this saiyan female decided to become Crimson Sister instead of starting a revolution or doing something else less drastic than cursing her own race to extinction.

Something pretty bad must have happened to make her choose this other option... The Collector killing her baby, her isnanity at the loss of her life mate (they had been the very last and only ones to mate for life among saiyans), or even the two together perhaps?

Anyway, hope you consider writing this prequel.