Reviews for Terrible Swift Sword
machievelli chapter 1 . 11/10/2013
Posted 16 August 2013, at the Starwarsknights web site and the Lucasforums Coruscant Entertainment Center in my The Critic's Two Cents. I was posting directly to the actual story threads, but had problems last year so I was stymied in my attempts to post the reviews. But you on fanfiction deserve your reviews, even if I am running late. But I'm catching up as you read this!

Some of the work I read is what I consider worthy of a professional. These are marked as Picks of the Week. While they are posted on Starwarsknights I am adding the best of the week where applicable.

Mandalorian War overview ending after Malachor V: Revan embraces her dark destiny

The piece is one of the best about this specific period I have seen to date. As Revan slides further to the dark, you can see her rationalizing why she must do what she does. You also get a glimpse of the political BS she is dealing with as she does. There is only two flaws, and one of them is technical.

The Mandalorian home world and system, like the leader of their society, is called Manda'lor, though Mandalore is considered acceptable. If you consider their society like the Japanese of World War II, Malachor V was more comparable to the Battle of Okinawa, the first island of what the Japanese had long considered their home territory; it had been occupied as a prefecture in 1609. A necessary battle to prove that long held territories could be taken away from them.

A comparable situation to what you describe (If it had been their home system) would have been choosing Kyoto Japan for the first nuke, since the primary residence of the Emperor is there. Yet in a little known or remarked upon bit of history, the government derived their power from the consent of the Emperor, even if he had no real authority to tell them what to do.

Upon hearing of the destruction of Hiroshima, Emperor Hirohito ordered his ministers into his presence, and ordered them to sue for peace and accept whatever terms the Allies would give them. When they tried to come up with reasons why he did not have such authority, his answer was, 'there will be no further discussion'.

The combination of foot dragging by those ministers, and the fact that the Russians (Who had been accepting their peace proposals for the last six months, but never passing them on to the Allies) caused the destruction of Nagasaki three days later. In fact, the 'reply' from the Russians was to invade Manchuria.

But without the Emperor to order them to stop, the war would have been more like our worst case; that the Allies would have suffered an estimated 5 million additional casualties per home island, and as Halsey had said, Japanese would only have been spoken in hell

Technical, MSG deployment: The Mass Shadow Generator was there we know. However deploying it (Using rather than delivering it for use) would have been a strategic decision, not a tactical one. Consider the delivery of the two atomic bombs during that war. Even with Little Boy sitting on his air base, Colonel Paul W. Tibbets, Jr., commander of the 509th Composite Group did not have the authority to load it on a bomber and drop it until he received orders from what is now called NCA, National Command Authority. Yet this is exactly what you have had Malak do; I have the weapon, use it.

The controls in place to avoid accidental deployment of a nuclear weapon have been used by every nation that has ever fielded them. The man with his finger on the button does not have the authority to press that button until told to do so.

In my own Return From Exile which will be posted in a few months, I have a similar situation, but with two major differences; first, thanks to the possibility of a communication failure (And primarily due to that same incompetent Republic NCA), the commander of the ship carrying it did have such authority, those his orders (From his direct superior, Revan) were to deploy it only if the battle was being lost. So while the cutscenes in the game say that the Exile gave the order, and Bao Dur carried it out, I did not use that.

What happened (In my version) was the idiot in command saw the battle being won, knew that except for a footnote, he would not even be mentioned, so he reset the operational parameters, then on his own authority, deployed it causing most of the deaths in the battle.

Those flaw aside, it is an excellent work.

Pick of the Week
Ace of Spies chapter 10 . 10/18/2013
At first I had a problem with sombody just saying 'Revan' and POOF Revan/Aerin is all powerful, but honestly the way wrote it was too good for it to matter.
Ace of Spies chapter 1 . 10/17/2013
That was one of the best duels I ever read. AAHHHHHHHH
Phygmalion chapter 19 . 8/25/2008
I like what I see thus far. Keep up the good work!

Any chances of a sequel with KOTOR II, perhaps?
Darth Demon2 chapter 18 . 8/23/2008
Excellant chapter
Darth Demon2 chapter 16 . 8/20/2008
Excellent chapter
Darth Demon2 chapter 15 . 8/14/2008
Great story, can't wait for more.
Phygmalion chapter 12 . 8/8/2008
Ooh! Cliffhanger! You really know how to lead fans on. Keep up the good work!
Phygmalion chapter 10 . 7/31/2008
Agh! Cliffhanger! You're doing a great job with the story. Keep up the good work!
Tankred chapter 19 . 5/13/2005
Oy, what about that armor Bandon had? And Calo Nord's armor? I haven't even heard anything about that one yet...
Rebel Trooper Mike chapter 19 . 5/8/2005
One more down...two to go.
Dark Siders chapter 19 . 3/20/2005
Holy cow, girlfriend, that duel made us sweat.

We could just see Aerin being smashed through that table. Very visceral.

The touch with Aerin blinding Bandon was priceless. You have a good use of symbolism.

On to Book IV...Dark Siders.

Don't forget us when you leave.
Windaria chapter 19 . 3/14/2005
Wow... freaky weird, I actually warranted a mention! Woo hoo!

Anyway, still absolutely fabulous and going strong and now onto number 4... and since you have yet to finish it I can tell that I will be driven mad until you do. It just isn't fair...

That said... it just seems like something everyone does when writing space battles, they write as if ships would have inertia and as if you would have to actually burn fuel to keep going. I mean, unless I'm wrong and my knowledge of space flight and such is about as limited as it could be, few would know less than I... it was just my understanding that if you give something a bump out there, the only time you need to expend fuel after that is to slow it or turn it.

Then again, I guess the question would be... how close to the planet were they, maybe the gravity would have some effect? At which point would it cease to have a noticable one? Oh well...
Evan chapter 14 . 3/12/2005
Man, that Ergot is a snake.

Interesting how Aerin is starting to get recognized by the Sith.

PadawanMage chapter 19 . 3/11/2005
Hmm, did Bandon recognize the stance Aerin took as something someone else might've used before?

LOL, I'm sorry, but where could *I* get a toy Ebon Hawk of my own?

I have to wonder how Bastila's own slide to the dark side will be affected by her relationship with Kyle?

Flying into a storm, alright...
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