|Reviews for The Amazon and The Moneylender|
| Guest chapter 13 . 5/13
This is fantastic in allot of ways,
I want more.
I am concerned that you are fixing everybody,
Curses are fun and sort of the main antagonist of the show.
Plus nabiki is clever if she wants to keep making money off the spring water she has to have cursed people around.
Some people would want curses too.
Hopposai might like spring of drowned girl for Purvy reasons, and that one character who is a boy and dresses as a girl would be all over it.
Also I was hoping effects would combine more.
Girl and twin did.
Shampoos cat and girl could totally result in catgirl.
Pig boy is a bit awkward but it's fun.
Anyway I would love more chapters.
| James Birdsong chapter 13 . 1/11
| TheAdeptes chapter 13 . 1/24/2014
This is an amazing story. You must finish it! Please keep writing
| TheAdeptes chapter 13 . 10/2/2013
This is an amazing story! I can't wait for the next installment.
| usagenotreally chapter 13 . 8/16/2013
i've always thought this story was finished? just wondering why people asking for an update? maybe in it was not completed? or is it just me who thought this story was completed? forgotten this story a bit. read it in "casual elegance site" Ryoga/Ukyo site. i think it was a long time ago, and i have to used a tool in order for me to read it. also, i saw this story in deviant art. maybe i should re-check if this story was finished. or need an update.
| Noy Telin'u chapter 13 . 10/20/2012
Close enough to yuri for me! _
| velvetkit chapter 13 . 2/22/2010
This is, up to this point, an excellent story, as all of your stories that I've read are. I do hope you continue it. After all, Kuno must be brought to justice and I really want to see what happens with Ranko as well
| damoclesAngel chapter 13 . 6/14/2009
I don't suppose there's any progress on this in the last... oh.. 5 years or so? it's been a good read in any case
| jupitersthunder chapter 13 . 2/4/2008
I saw part of this story on another site and I've been looking for it ever since! This is a great story. PLEASE UPDATE SOON!
| Michael The-Zorch Haney chapter 13 . 12/29/2007
Great fic so far. I never really did like Kuno at all, I have one fic that sort of redeems him but I feel dirty for doing it. Anyway, I really like this story and I hope you continue it.
| DCWestby chapter 13 . 7/28/2005
very good story.. wish you'd finish it tho...
Very good writing.
| Ghost chapter 1 . 3/31/2005
This is not a bad story, but it can still need improvement.
You’re a good writer, but this story was a bit difficult to follow at some points. The flashbacks need to be more distinct, I kept confusing them with what was actually going on. Also, you need to focus less on the dialogue and more on the rest.
Your weakness is not your technique. Like so many other Ranma writers, you tend to exaggerate the characters. In particular, I think Kuno got the short end of the stick here. He’s stupid and eccentric, not insane. Anyway, he’d never attack a girl he likes, at least not without holding back immensely.
(Interestingly, though, you seem to have made him a bit too strong rather then the other way around. Ryoga handily beats Mousse like a drum, so I don’t think he’d have any real trouble with Kuno.)
Also, I really wish people would lay off the “Nabiki owns Nerima” cliché. She’s sneaky, but she’s not Hiruma Youichi or anything. (In this story it sort of works, though.)
I rather liked the Jigoku Hi Hono’o, even though it sort of came out of the blue. I know coming up with special techniques isn’t as easy as it seems, so you shall have kudos for that.
Never use multiple exclamation marks. It’s the mark of an amateur, and you’re definitely better then that.
You seem to be taking your time with the actual Nabiki/Shampoo, which is good. Too many writers rush into these things instead of letting it develop gradually.
| crosstoe chapter 13 . 12/8/2004
took ages to read!
very good, im waiting for the next chapter.
| Elorian Ridenow chapter 13 . 8/26/2004
I was reading the whole thing at work always switching back and forth between work and your story..I simply couldn't stop...
You're quite good :)
As for the draft: There are a few confusing points...
you still didnt correct the sensai - sensei thing
there are a few parts in your story I didnt understand what you meant (read it through again..you'll find it quickly)
Oh yea..you should add indetion whenever the scene changes..sometimes I had trouble figuring out who says what and where...that endangers the story flow which is quite good and one of the most important things!
| dragon-game chapter 13 . 7/8/2004
Please continue it.