|Reviews for The Serpents' Society and the Guild of the Eagle|
| Adana Wellbeloved chapter 32 . 8/25/2015
Thank you for writing this series. I found all of the books (including the first) to be pleasantly readable. I love Slythern stories and I found myself surprised that your storyline didn't follow the typical "Snape saves the day" theme. In fact, early in the series I kept wondering why the kids never seemed to think of going to Snape for help. They always seemed to think of, then nixing the idea of, going to Dumbledore and McGonogal. But it's like Snape never even crossed their minds much outside of the classroom. I can't say whether I wanted him a bit more visible or not, but I did keep thinking about why they never even considered going to their head of house.
I loved Beth and her family. Complex and engaging without overly angsty. Thank you for not killing Dad! I was expecting to read of his demise at the end of her schooling and was happily surprised. Although I do think the little family, including Richard of course, had best go back to the U.S. until the war is over.
The unicorn freeing Beth of the mark seemed a little forced. I've never been a big fan of "because...magic!". I think I would have rather seen Beth figuring out that a Unicorn could help her, then when she approached it for a potion ingredient the unicorn stabbing her and removing the stain. It's just a thought, though. You're the one that's spent so much time crafting this story. I'm just the one who truly enjoyed reading it. Thanks.
| Mezzem313 chapter 32 . 12/4/2014
I love your entire series, but this story was my absolute favorite. The Ravenclaws made an appearance with their secret society! Yay!
I just have a question and a suggestion:
Now that Beth doesn't have the Dark Mark and the Dark Lord can't spy on them through their rings, you make it sound like almost everything is okay for her and the others and they're free. But they aren't. The Dark Lord and many of the Death Eaters know who they are and won't hesitate to kill them now since he can't control them anymore. The Dark Lord still wants Beth dead, so she can't get a normal job and be in public because a Death Eater could find her and kill her and maybe her father. Thus, she needs to go into hiding. Maybe she and Richard will go into hiding together :)
I was thinking of another ending for this story, and I came up with a really depressing (but awesome) one. What if:
Evan recovered after Beth's adventure with blowing up the crypt but before the Dark Lord's call, so he went with Snape and Beth to the meeting. Chris didn't speak to Beth at all, like he behaved the other times the Death Eaters met. Thus, Beth was killed by Riggs while Evan and Snape watched, unable to do anything. Snape was charged with bringing Beth's body back to Hogwarts and making her death look like it was caused by a potion exploding. Once they arrive back at Hogwarts, Evan, acting emotionless because he's trying to hold in his feelings, immediately seeks out one of the SS members and tells them to tell the others and the GE to meet in the GE's tower. Once everyone is there, Melissa asks where Beth is. Evan replies, "She's not coming." Melissa panics slightly, "Where is she? Is she hurt?" Evan's stoic nature breaks and says loudly, "Beth's dead!" The room gets deathly quiet. Tears start to drip down Evan's face. Shocked, Melissa asks in disbelief, "What? How?" "Riggs said the Avada Kedavra." "What? When?" "He asked permission to do it after he squealed on her to to Dark Lord.” Many of the Slytherins cursed loudly at Riggs. This time it was Deirdre who asked, "How do you know this?" Evan looked at her with dead eyes, "I was there, right next to her." "Then why didn't you do anything?" Bruce asked angry with grief. Evan looked at him listlessly, "I couldn't. Riggs or the Dark Lord or any of the other Death Eaters would have tortured and killed us both. We were helpless." "Wait," Deirdre interrupted, "Where were you?" "We were at the Dark Lord's headquarters." "Why?" "Because the Dark Lord called us so he could punish his Death Eaters for his failures." The Ravenclaws' eyes widened with what he implied, and they all took a step back from him. Deirdre stated bluntly, "You're a Death Eater. You and Beth were both Death Eaters. That's how you knew Umbridge wasn't one." Evan pulled up his sleeve to reveal his Dark Mark and said, "Yes, but not by choice. Beth and I were given to the Dark Lord as children." "How did you get to his headquarters?" another Ravenclaw asked. "The other resident Death Eater at Hogwarts took Beth and me by Floo." "There's another Death Eater here? Who is it?" several people exclaimed, including Melissa. Evan looked Melissa in the eyes and said, “Beth and I agreed that we should keep it a secret, and I’m keeping her wish.” There was silence until a Ravenclaw spoke up, “You said earlier that Riggs squealed on Beth, but you didn’t say what for.” “Beth blew up…” And so on. The GE and SS opened up to each other and became closer. Evan wasn’t as heartless anymore but now extremely determined. Poor Richard. Later they would go to Beth’s funeral. The End. Then you could write another story about how Evan is trying to take down the Dark Lord from within. Takes place during the Half-Blood Prince. Next story continues with the Deathly Hallows. It would be so awesome! I wish you would write it.
I also agree with RedCloakedMaiden’s review. Pretty please with chocolate frogs on top!
| Qoheleth chapter 1 . 4/16/2014
I'm sorry, I know this is not at all a crucial point, but I simply have to ask: How does Richard Shaw react when people affect exaggerated Chinese accents and call him "Rick"?
| PseudonymousPersona chapter 32 . 11/4/2013
You are an amazing person.
This story is amazing.
This series is amazing.
This story is brilliant, though not as joyous as the others it was just as amazing.
These obviously took a lot of time and effort, and I applaud you for sticking with it.
I have seriously loved reading these, your stupidly talented and shamefully amazing at writing.
As you can clearly see I adore you and your writing, but I do have two criticisms,
1. Throughout the series the students that are 2 years older than Harry are doing the exact same curriculum.
2. The ending with the whole unicorn wiping the mark? As much as I cheered when Beth was free, it was a bit... weird...
Anyway incredible job and I will definitely come back to read these again...
Three cheers for Amberdulan...
cheer cheer cheer
| PseudonymousPersona chapter 5 . 11/3/2013
YAY! I was right!
RICHARDS ALIVE! RICHARD'S ALIVE! RCHARD'S ALIVE!
| PseudonymousPersona chapter 4 . 11/3/2013
OK, I'm back.
I know its been like ten minutes, but I had to keep reading...
Am I right in suspecting that Richard is not dead, he's just resting?...
| PseudonymousPersona chapter 3 . 11/3/2013
WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOO
I am not reading any more! No, its not right, you can't just KILL RICHARD!
| Kareyann14 chapter 32 . 6/20/2012
You should definitely write more S.S.A books! Ive been reading them all week and I'm sad that there are no more :(
| RedCloakedMaiden chapter 32 . 11/8/2010
This is quite probably my favorite fanfiction series ever written. I know you probably won't read this review and you are finished, but I feel you should know how much I appreciated your time and ingeniuty in writing this.
And if you ever thought about making a sequel series to the Serpents' Society...Albus Potter would be interesting to feature, no? And perhaps Scorpius Malfoy could be the member of the Guild of the Eagle or Rose could be the founder of the Hufflepuff secret society...Just suggesting! I'd write it myself except that this is your genius and I already have my own. :)
| Sweet Shy Suz chapter 32 . 9/13/2010
I can't believe it's over, I want more! What happens to them now? Do they fight in the war against He who shall not be named? Are they divided, some on one side some on the other? This is a story I shall not forgot for a long time.
| Uli chapter 32 . 5/23/2008
A great story. I loved the way your stories are set alongside the original stories from a Slytherin point of view which is different from Malfoy's or Snape's. I like the idea of a secret society in Slytherin loyal (more or less) to Dumbledore and opposed to the Voldemort, even though he was the founder.
Great reading. Thanks.
| Sean Mulligan chapter 1 . 6/19/2007
This is a great Slytherin story.
| Atilia Dawn Black chapter 32 . 11/15/2005
I know I've read all five of the stories before, but I just finished reading them again, it took me a while, but it was worth it. I LOVED it. I wish you would continue it, but I know that this was the last one. I really wish you had wrote who Mellisa wound up with, and how long it took Beth & Rich to get married, and whether Beth really did have the same protection as Harry, and what job she decided to take. And I liked the girl Blaise, it wouldn't have been as great if she was a he. Well, just wanted to tell you, I really enjoyed all the 'Serpent's Society' stories, even the first one.
~*Atilia Dawn Black*~
| Asmodeus1389 chapter 32 . 7/13/2005
Another exciting Amberdulen story come to an end. Only problem is, this time, I don't have another one to look forward to. Maybe you could at least do like a one-shot for the next story or something.
But really, A great story, as usual. My compliments to the author.
| LunaLover chapter 32 . 6/6/2005
At last the long journey is over. I've been following the series ever since the first two books were out. It was wonderful to follow the events from the society’s perspective. IMO, this is the best HP funfic and yes, I do include the first one in it too. All in all it could have been a bit shorter, but Jo is suffering from that disease too.
I do hope that the final words wasn’t said, I want to know what will happen to Beth, I am so attached to her.
Thank you for all of these years of good writing under such strict rules.
Thank you again.