|Reviews for The Game Begins|
| AerynPK chapter 7 . 11/8/2007
This was very good. I loved how you had it twisted in the end. Doing it from Steph's view was very good. I enjoyed it very much. Look foward to read more of your creative writing.
| Disco Inferno1 chapter 7 . 7/30/2007
I was looking for Triple H fics and lizzy-beth-lizzy suggested your fic. I’m so glad she did, even though I had no idea why after the first chapter.
Some of my favorite lines were: “God I love having power. I can make the brawniest men shake and the bitchiest ice queens tremble, just by calling an unexpected meeting; and smiling.” And “Yea, Shane, you a playa’. You’re right up there with Jay-Z and P. Diddy.” Loved this: “I sat looking in the mirror, brushing my hair and contemplating on what an evil genius I truly am. Is it so wrong to want to have a little fun, and at the expense of someone who practically ruined my life time and again?” This was a whoohoo moment: “I on the other hand discovered that the man I held so much bitterness toward, might actually be the right man for me after all.” “As I stared at the face of my pathetic brother, I thought to myself, I came back to life for this? I’d rather be dead.”—LOL!
I like the contrast that you’ve created in the opposing characters of H and Jericho. Hunter eating, sleeping, and living wrestling seems to spot on. At least Steph could admit that he really was a good guy, just not for her. Jericho ‘quiet’ though? _ “For those of you who think Triple H is a big and bad tough guy, he’s actually a sucker for the mushy talk and pet names.”—isn’t he just adorable? ;) I just love the little comments about H, like: “My husband may be a multimillion dollar wrestling superstar, but he is still just one of the boys.”
I think it’s a little out of Steph’s character to have never pushed Chris to tell her what Shane had said to make him retreat from her or for her to prove whatever the hell it was he said was wrong (maybe she just wasn’t exactly the assertive type then). But otherwise, I love her character. I don’t condone the manipulative bitch that she is but she’s good at doing that.
Bringing back Test was awesome and I could just imagine the look on Shane’s. Chris in Steph’s driveway was a huge surprise. But if you’re in a coma, I suppose you can make anything happen. ;) And yes, that surprised the hell out of me. At first, I thought the whole thing from beginning to end was her dreaming in the coma. So glad she realized what she had in Hunter! Loved that!
Nice way to end this! The final lines were good!
| TakerTakeMe chapter 7 . 1/21/2006
Ok, so that really surprised the heck out of me. I thought she was in bed with Chris, and it turned out that she had never even made it home! That really got me! You're good. Anyway, she didn't end up with Chris, BUT I think your story is just perfect the way that you ended it. Did you ever decide to do a sequel from someone else's point of view? I think it'd be cool if you did one from Chris's point of view where he actually finds out that Steph never thought she was too good for him... Just a thought. Anyway, great story!
| nightwoman chapter 7 . 3/21/2005
That was a very good story! Never thought of H actually having feelings LOL. Good job.
| Pinayprincesa chapter 7 . 2/16/2005
aw so sweet:D
| Y2Jen chapter 7 . 2/16/2005
wow yea that was a shock, but it was a great ending, good job. if you do others like it from another pov, I'll be sure to keep my eye out for em!
| Latisha C chapter 7 . 2/15/2005
I was surprised. God job on this chapter an overall great job on the ending.
| pepsicolagurl chapter 6 . 2/15/2005
Hi. So, Dame kicked my butt over here again, and I'd like to apologize ahead of time if I ramble, but I blame it on the cold medications. And now, onto the review...
I loved the ending. Some people might call it a cop-out, but I thought it was brilliant. It's like you built up this entire thing, especially Chapter Six, and made me completely change my mind about the Triple H character that you wrote. Normally, I'm not a fan of him in stories, because everyone seems to write him the same, so congrats to you on changing my view a little on him.
Aside from that, one of the few things that did disappoint me about the story was the length. I think that you could have spent a little more time with the characters, especially involving the reader a little more in the struggle that Stephanie had deciding whether she wanted to go back to Triple H, whether she really wanted Chris...really build up the struggle in her mind.
The only other thing that I could suggest you work on is character development (which kind of goes hand in hand with what I wrote above). A little more history on them would have sufficed, such as a flashback to when Stephanie was about to marry Triple H, and she had a run-in with hris or something like that. It's only because the character that you wrote for Chris was kind of...empty. He was there, and he spoke, and she was attracted to him, but we didn't know him. I realize that you were focusing on Stephanie, but that's one of the problems that I find with first person stories. You really only get involved fully in one character. I'm not telling you not to write first person, because that's what you're comfortable with, just like how I'm more comfortable writing in third person.
But I still think that you did a great job. Aside from a few spelling mistakes (yeah, I know there's probably some in here), and a few punctuation mistakes (you just missed a few commas in some are your friend. As you probably can tell from this, I firmly believe in that), you did an excellent job. I find it hard to believe that this is only your second posting for fan fiction, because it's great.
And I love the idea that you're thinking of writing a companion piece, from another person's point of view. I think it would be great to get the other side of the story, from any of the characters that you've mentioned there.
With that, if you ever need any help, email me. I'd be more than happy to help you, whether you'd like someone to read over your chapters before you post them, or just if you have a few questions.
Hope this helps you, and keep writing. I want to read more, now.
| KeeKeeBaby chapter 7 . 2/15/2005
Yea, I was surprised but I would like to know what happened next! Nice chap!
| Dame Flame chapter 7 . 2/15/2005
Wow, now that was an ending that I wasn't expecting, and it certainly surprised me. I think it was a nice touch to throw that in.
I found it interesting that while you started out wanting the reader to dislike or maybe feel indifferent to Triple H, you completely turned it around and made me feel sympathetic for him, especially there at the end, when he's explaining about how he feels about Shane and whatnot. It was a nice little twist.
Again, you've improved by leaps and bounds since your first posting, and you got better with each chapter that you wrote.
And thank you for not going all sugary sweet with the ending, either. Sometimes that's good, but in this case, I think it was better that you didn't. You consistently kept your characters in character, throughout the entire story. Two big thumbs up to that one.
Can't wait for what you come up with next.
| Pinayprincesa chapter 6 . 2/14/2005
aw Chris and Steph r just too cute:D
| Lil'-AngelwWings chapter 6 . 2/14/2005
Awesome chapter. I can't wait to read the next one. I kind of feel sorry for Chris. I like Triple H in this story a lot. Even though he's ugly on the outside, you show that looks aren't everything. I love the family conflict thing, especially between Stephanie and her brother Shane. You seem to have them pegged just right.
Write again soon.
| Latisha C chapter 6 . 2/13/2005
Great chapter, Chica. Don't worry you'll be getting a nice little surprise in your inbox, with in an hour or so, if my beta gets back to me soon.
| Pinayprincesa chapter 5 . 2/11/2005
aw so cute;)Post more soon!
| Missy LitaHardyY2J chapter 5 . 2/10/2005
Great story! I like how you've written it and how you made H actually have a heart. Very intriguing. And if you want my opion, I'm always a diehard Steph/Jericho shipper.