Reviews for Star Fox: Assault
Anderson Gutierrez chapter 1 . 10/3/2012
Seriously... THIS WAS THE BEST AND MOST FUNNY FANFIC EVER MADE! GOOD JOB MATE! (No, I'm not Australian, I'm Brazilian) FOR CHAPTER 8, MAKE THEM DO THE MISSION BEFORE THE APAROID WORLD CAN BE INVADED BY THEM OK?! MAKE THIS FANFIC LOOK MORE LIKE THE GAME! But with those romance things of Fox and Krystal (I call it Foxystal couple) and more! Make a crossover with Starfox and the Burnout Series! it will be really cool!
TacticianLyra chapter 7 . 12/10/2011
Keep going! ~Myra
TheCryoLegionaire chapter 7 . 11/15/2011
Pro story. I don't mind a few grammatical errors here and there, as your details, plot, and conflict are great. Do re-check, however. I enjoy the saga of characters being mentioned and you characterized them very fittingly. I am a big fan of the Starfox franchise (owning from SF1 to SF3DS, and even the unreleased SF2) and look forward to your next post.

PS- Finally, cover fire from Great Fox and Cornerian Fleet! Wished you could call in Great Fox airstrike in multiplayer or even mission/story mode.
knownobody chapter 7 . 11/14/2011
ohhhhh :3 please update
116fox chapter 7 . 8/9/2011
very good
Eamon Gallagher chapter 7 . 8/2/2011
Well, I've just finished reading this fanfiction and I must say, this is one of the best ones I've seen so far. It is very well constructed and I enjoyed reading it. I've actually created my own fanfiction that takes place a little after this fanfiction and some of the information in this, I've used as background information for mine. I hope you get a chance to read and review my story. Anyway, excellent job. I hope to see more.
yiffo2 chapter 4 . 3/9/2011
boy i like the way crystal thinx. i like em independent?
Louismrowe chapter 7 . 9/10/2010
Great Job. Keep it up.
dogman15 chapter 1 . 6/30/2010
Hi! I'm a new reader, and I'm hoping it's okay if I start off this review with some positive criticisms.

Fox is 26 (not 23) years old at the time of Star Fox Adventures, and 27 during Star Fox: Assault. He was born 18 years before the Lylat Wars, making him 18 years old during Star Fox 64. Star Fox Adventures takes place 8 years after Star Fox 64. Krystal, on the other hand, was born 11 years before the Lylat Wars, because she is 19 in Star Fox Adventures, 20 in Star Fox: Assault.

Also, space isn't freezing cold, as most fiction would have you believe. It's fine in this story, but I think you might want to read the "Space Is Cold" article on TV Tropes for more information.

Peppy Hare was 41 years old in Star Fox 64 (I can give you a link to the archived offical Star Fox 64 website for proof), so 8 years later he would be 49; Age 50 in Star Fox: Assault. I assume the flashback where he's 35 takes place six years before the Lylat Wars.

There are a few slight spelling errors. I don't remember most of them because I wasn't keeping a tally as I read. However, in one sentence, you said "Pigma Dengar was a greedy and selfish hog who thought nothing of himself." If he thought nothing of himself, he wouldn't think he was very important. You probably meant to say "who thought of nothing but himself." How about "and it would be greatly need*ed* on Fox's StarFox team," instead of "and it would be greatly need on Fox's StarFox team."

"The generalis up there waiting for you," and "...out there, [unneeded paragraph break] we're going to need..." are just two phrases that need reworking. Also, "Aparoid" is a proper noun, and as such it should be capitalized.

What do "OD" and "VAC" mean? Optical Density? Video Audio C-something?

Keep in mind, I mean well by all of this criticism. It means that I'm really enjoying the story so far - to the point that I pick it apart. If I didn't like this story, I would tell you. I'll keep reading. (BTW, I was referred here by the Krystal Archive website, which has a better list of fan fictions than TV Trope's "Star Fox" page.) I'm reading the next chapter soon.
Starfox Rocks chapter 1 . 6/10/2010
Jimmy, I read your whole story so far... and I have to say, it is indeed the best fanfiction story, of any archive, I've ever read. No one could capture all these emotions in a perfect way without screwing everything around; and making the starfox team all look like perverts. Seriously, great job; the new dialouge, the battles' intense action, the touching romance, all make this story the greatest ever. Keep going with this story. and may God give you the energy to keep writing more...

By the way;

"You really should TRY A SOMERSAULT some time."

"Or maybe A U-TURN..."

"And you definately should PRESS Z OR R TWICE to DO THE BARREL ROLL!"

"Also you could HIT THE BRAKES... or USE THE BOOST TO GET THROUGH!"
Fox MC chapter 1 . 6/6/2010
Your story's beginning is great, actually one of the most wonderfully detailed I've ever read. Great job; my rating is 10/10!

P.S. A few of the character lines were not exactly like the game, but the chapter and prolouge still rocked!
Frostile chapter 3 . 8/15/2009
This chapter has a lot of emotions in it. It deeply involved me in the story and is a very touching chapter, Nice work!
Frostile chapter 1 . 8/14/2009
This Story is excellent so far! With the added action it makes it seem even better! I cant wait to see the final product!
Valenx chapter 7 . 4/26/2009
To keep people reading this amazing story...absolutely loved it. its been 2 years so im hoping for an update soon.
alexxxcore chapter 1 . 10/13/2006
Hey Jimmy,

Do me a huge favor. Next time you decide to IM me and give me a firm talking to...make sure that the person who actually messed with your story..was me. Assumption just ends up making you look stupid. I haven't done shit to your story. As a matter of fact, this is the first comment I've ever left on your story. So how about you, quote unquote "freakin' can it" and stop trying to introduce even more conflict in your already sad mediocre life. I wish you a broken heart and a happy new year.

your pal,

Alex
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