|Reviews for What Teenagers Do in Basements|
| hals179 chapter 1 . 7/23
Thank you for your work, It wasn't horrible but I didn't quite like it. Here I leave you my thoughts:
- This was way too out of character. Haru is sixteen not five. And seriously all than manliness proving is just not like him.
- Haru and Elie LOVE each other. That doesn't mean they don't argue but there is always that feeling underneath their actions. There is NO feeling in your story, and NO fluffiness. Kissing and having sex isn't fluffy if there is no love shown.
- Was it really necessary for you to write so many homophobic hints? That kind of annoys me, and I may not be the only one. I don't know if you intended them or if you were just trying to prove that Haru is straight, but everything you write gives a message to the future readers so, be sure of what you want to transmit.
Well, that's just my opinion. I thought it might be useful to you, or not. I wanted to make it known anyway. Take it or leave it. There is no offence intended, you don't have to agree with me. I just like everyone who tries to put what it's in their minds to words.
| HuntressXHunter chapter 1 . 3/20/2016
| DiAnna44 chapter 1 . 6/16/2013
Oh so good, and oh so funny! Loved it! 3 XD
| TheLiterateCrawdad chapter 1 . 4/14/2010
What! No! Screw you! Men are not like that! We are not like that, Screw you!
Um..er...right! On to the actual review!
Haru and Ellie: WAY OUT OF CHARACTER! If this wasn't on the Rave master archive I could have sworn these were two different people sharing names with the characters we all know and love. Also, you kinda over did it with phrases like "all doors should burn in the ninth level of hell" and " Can't let her think I'm a child so I'll just… stick my tongue out… at her… damnit. I am such a child" Oh! And who could forget "Haru jerked his chin out in a haughty, you-can't-scare-because-I'm-a-man-hear-me-roar kind of way" I mean...really? And my personal favorite "Still, it was a shot at his fragile male-ego and even if she didn't believe it, his back stiffened. I'm a man's man. I manly man man!" Is this really how girls view guys? Damn, you people need a crash course on what goes through our minds. And this will come as a shocker but it's not always sex. I know what your thinking: Blasphemy! But it’s true.
Concerning sex: We're all big boys here. You don't have to put "it" in plave of sex. It's okay to say sex. We're not going to blush and giggle every time we read that word. It's ok.
I wouldn’t say the writing was good, but it was humorous…at times. In all it wasn’t too terrible, just not that good.
| Galatians 5.16 chapter 1 . 1/29/2009
e gah...have some points:
1. humor; yep, that was just American humor for me.
2. originality; the way you used these ideas, including those Chistian curses and all, are you antichrist or christian? i couldn't tell. :P
3. perfect narration; different narration for a change -
1. Bad interpretation of characters; Haru and Elie are like, major best friends! they are just so childish but they dont fight or argue like children! heck, they love each other. And it is so obvious, if you really watch the show, is that HARU IS NOT GAY! he'sjust inexperienced.
2. Using perversity over love; Haru and Elie's love is very deep, and the way you wrote it messed up the whole thing, although its good, but if you're not American, you wouldn't exactly like it.
well, sorry for this, but you know, rave's my fave anime/manga ever since i was seven, and this just somehow messed it up for me, even if it was funny or unique.
| sanctuary-in-dreams chapter 1 . 12/9/2007
i realy enjoyed this. hilarious, sweet, and only that, but u write very well. kudos!
| unknown chapter 1 . 3/25/2007
that was freaky ok just freakin freaky so u made it exciting but i wanted somthin cool but dont ask 4 me
| a lovely idiot chapter 1 . 1/20/2007
This fanfiction wins at life. *_*
That's all I really have to say.
| Lord Rasler chapter 1 . 12/11/2006
o that was major perv, THATS WHY I LOVED IT- i kinda thought haru was gay when i first saw the show, the whole metro look and all. its nice to know haru " worships the breats" as u so bluntly put! i feel bad for musica, he well never see again:( hehe!
P.S. what was with the antichrist door thing... very original mind u-
| jeff savior chapter 1 . 11/29/2006
that was very...INTERESTING...yeah, interesting:)
i kinda had the feeling that haru was gay, you know, the metro look and all. he had me confussed a while about his sexually prefrence, but this cleared things up a bit, even if it never really happened. come to think of it, that is EXACTLY what would probibly happen. KUDOS!( oh shit, not me too...)
(damn antichrist door, HEHE:))
| jeff chapter 1 . 11/15/2006
Very, VERY, interesting. Sex in a basement, original, Kudos.(uhoh)
| Lithium-Flower511 chapter 1 . 9/6/2006
| sweet cookie dough chapter 1 . 5/28/2006
ok ok seriously! haru and elie aren't so mean to each other! lol any ways nice story keep it up. And take it down on the cussing! lololol
| Sarah chapter 1 . 5/13/2006
U R the most perverted person i have ever known existed!ugg u sicken me.
| A critic chapter 1 . 4/30/2006
Sorry, but that was very, very, VERY OOC.