Reviews for The Darkness Within
ITC chapter 16 . 12/28/2015
Pointless, no closure, disconnected, lost thoughts in epilogue.
daphnegg123 chapter 15 . 12/11/2015
spectacular absolutely spectacular a masterpiece you broke my heart I cried at the end . Absolutely wonderful
OllyOllyOxycodone chapter 1 . 11/18/2015
Your basic emo dark Harry story. Completely average in every way.
G.Potter93 chapter 16 . 3/30/2015
So you said a couple of months... How about 10 years after you've published it... You get a review?

Great story! I really enjoyed it.
old-crow chapter 16 . 3/29/2015
Hi,

All in all a very well written first story. It felt like you kept things moving at a nice pace.

One of the advantages of posting stories on a site like this is that you have the opportunity to continually revise your chapters after initially posting them and see what the feedback is on the revised chapter.

You might consider adding a page or two to your final battle scene. It could have used a bit more detail and additional clarity.

That said, it was a very good read. Thanks for sharing it.

Old-Crow
old-crow chapter 5 . 3/29/2015
Hi,

I like what I've read so far. Should you decide to write another tale, you might consider completing at least half of the tale before posting chapters. Doing so allows you the opportunity to revise earlier sections to better fit your later ideas.

Your chapter five really should have been the end of the first chapter. As it stands, the chapters that you've posted appear to represent an evening's writing, rather than a logical ending point.

All in all, a very good start.

Old-Crow
Guest chapter 16 . 3/27/2015
very nice story, i love your harry-hermione relationship
CMVreud chapter 16 . 1/25/2015
While the last two chapters, or perhaps the last three, seem somewhat rushed, but I don't really know how to write "too-f*cking-much-happen-at-the-same-time"-scenes.
So interesting story about how one looks into the abyss and it eats him whole.
CMVreud chapter 5 . 1/25/2015
Prophecies!
And you add wizards to these prophecies!
And even let a wizard make a new (non-)prophecy, which surely will be self-fulfilling, as prophecies have a tendency to do.
Chim Cheree chapter 5 . 7/1/2014
I don't know if you are still reading the reviews to your stories, but if you are: I really am looking forward to see how this story progresses. I agree that stories were Harry suddenly wakes up and decides he wants to join Voldemort out of the blue are etc. are unbelievable. I'm curious how your spin on the whole prophecy thing will work out. Will Voldemort find out about the real one and kill Harry? Will the true prophecy lose its meaning if the two people involved don't believe in it anymore? The only problem I have so far is that Voldemort is a very accomplished legilimence and harry's occlumency never was is strong suit. I'll continue reading now. :)
Guest chapter 16 . 6/28/2014
Woah, not what I expected, but interesting nonetheless. Interesting and powerful.
Fenryka chapter 16 . 6/28/2014
Love this story! Wish you were writing a sequel
Sakura chapter 16 . 6/26/2014
One of the best AU Dark!Harry stories I have ever read!
Olivia-twiFan chapter 16 . 6/25/2014
Good. But not the ending I was expecting. I guess I wanted a dark but happy ever after
AliDarkHairedBeauty chapter 16 . 5/11/2014
Hey I don't understand the end? Could you explain it to me?
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