Reviews for Following the Footsteps of Destiny
Dark Qiviut chapter 9 . 6/24/2005
Uh-oh. Things are going by the wayside for the DigiDestned's 2nd Generation... and in a good way, too.

And you added a little cliffhanger in there. *laughs evilly* I was hoping for one. Yes, I'm a cliffie addict. BWAHAHAHAHA! Sorry.

Nice work, but there were a few errors that I want to point out.

1A. [ "Where do you think you're going?" Ema demanded. Her dark eyes were flashing. "The school entrance is the other way." ]

It should be... [ "Where do you think you're going?" Ema demanded, her dark eyes flashing. "The school entrance is the other way." ]. There was a little fluency eroor here.

1B. Another one... [ "Yes, I'm sure!" Dai snapped. His eyes were flashing with anger. ]

It should be... [ "Yes, I'm sure!" Dai snapped, his eyes flashing with anger. ]

2. When you italicized the character's thoughts, you didn't put in a beginning quote. You better fill that problem.

3A. Some grammar errors... [ Ryoko staggered in shock and ended up falling into Dai and Takara's laps. ]

It should be... [ Ryoko staggered in shock and ended up falling into Dai's and Takara's laps. ]

3B. Another one... [ Ema was definitely a one of a kind person. ]

It should be... [ Ema was definitely a one-of-a-kind person. ]. "One of a kind" was used as an adjective, so put hyphens between the words.

I think that's all here. Other than that, really nice work. Keep it up!

*eyes profile* You're planning on making a romance story, huh? Well, I'll keep an eye on it.

Catch ya later!
Tanner Walters chapter 4 . 6/24/2005
I like your story a lot. One thing that I think you should change is the closeness of the twins Matty and Mickey. I am a twin, and I know that although we are best friends, we arn't as close as Matty and Mickey. They are kind of weird in that sense.
Tanner Walters chapter 4 . 6/24/2005
I like your story a lot. One thing that I think you should change is the closeness of the twins Matty and Mickey. I am a twin, and I know that although we are best friends, we arn't as close as Matty and Mickey. They are kind of weird in that sense.
Hanael Pi Myths chapter 8 . 6/18/2005
Well, interesting couples there. How did you come up with all the children's names anyway? I'm definitely looking forward to the next chapter. Only one mistake that I could see. You should have used "than" not "then". "Than" is used for comparisons ("better than you"), while "then" is used in sequences ("first...,next..., then...) Those are also commonly confused words so be careful.
The Violent Tomboy chapter 8 . 6/17/2005
aka nunofyorbiz Are they gettign the same digimon as their parents?
Cinful aka Miricles-3 chapter 8 . 6/17/2005
MWUHAHAHA, Beat me now, LOG-IN! _ Moving on, cool, Wish i could go away for two weeks ;-; but anyways, still awesome so far. Not much on suggestions and as always, paitiently waiting on the next chapter _.
Dark Qiviut chapter 8 . 6/16/2005
Hi again. Interesting here with the minute confrontation between Dai & Ryoko. Man, Dai seems to have extreme hatred over this kid. I don't blame Dai, feeling turned down by that snotty brat Ryoko. I hope there's some comeuppance soon of that jerk.

Interesting work, Broken Angel01. Keep it up.

P.S.: When I mentioned Higuichimon & NetRaptor, these are the fanfics. Higuichimon's Kaiser fics & NetRaptor's "Three Days in the Digital World." You should also read Silver1's fics. Some of the fics have association with Ken's dark past.

NOTE: due to the fact that NetRaptor wrote it in the middle of Digimon 02, her fic has some inconsistancies, so keep that in mind.
Hanael Pi Myths chapter 7 . 6/10/2005
Well, as usual, you know how to keep your readers in suspense. I'm looking forward to more. Thanks for clearing up the confusion. There were only a few mistakes this time. First of all, the word is "grateful". "Greatful", besides not being a word at all, would mean full of greatness, not full of gratitude. You should really try using a spell check function; it doesn't take but a minute at the most, and it is also extremely helpful for grammar usually. I don't know if you have the means to add accents, but "José" needs one. Finally, you called him Spanish; but, since he was in Mexico, it makes more since to me that he would be Mexican. Of course, if you wanted to be safe, you could just call him "Spanish-speaking"; that would cover quite a few nationalities.
everclueless chapter 7 . 6/10/2005
Wasn't that short; besides it's the quality not the quantity that matters. Your story is good quality :)
ForbiddenLove2013 chapter 7 . 6/9/2005
great. write more!
Dark Qiviut chapter 7 . 6/9/2005
Hi again. Sorry for not reviewing earlier (too damn lazy).

It looks like we're seeing the talks between the Takaishis. I liked that little peaceful conversation.

I also enjoyed the conversation with Gennai and his counterparts (Jose, Ilya, Jackie, Hogan, & Benjamin). Yes, you got 'em right.

Nice work, Broken Angel. Keep it up!

P.S.: Thanks for your review. Yes, I agree with you on Ken. I admit, I see him as more of a darker character than what most people see. Only Ultra Sonikku, Higuichimon, SilvorMoon, & NetRaptor have shown us that side of him that is quite overlooked. That side is his constant guilt within himself. Throughout the show, he had lots of guilt and self-doubt; it was quite evident (from the "Genesis of Evil" episode to the party invitation to destroying the Control Spires on his own). That's possibly why he noticed the illusion of himself receiving all the blows from the estranged digimon out there.

Catch ya later!
Miricles-3 chapter 7 . 6/9/2005
*twitches* Stupid won't let me log-on. Anyways, loving it so far. Can't wait to find out what happened with Gennai and the others. Well, see ya at the next chapter. Now off to murder login button _ L8rz M-3
nunofyorbiz chapter 7 . 6/9/2005
Can't wait!
Cinful aka Miricles-3 chapter 6 . 6/5/2005
Awesome, cool to see Davis, hm, you might've already said this and i don't remember, but it seems Daichi doesn't know about the Digidestined, not THAT will be an interesting conflict. L8r, paitiently waiting on the next chapter. (HA, paitient, me, nah. lol)
Hanael Pi Myths chapter 6 . 6/3/2005
Great chapter! Davis seems to have matured (a little). It's nice that the kids all seem to have a good relationship with their parents. What breed of dog is Shadow, anyway? I was a bit confused when you started rattling off all those names, though. Whose cousin is Nobunari Kido? Taysuke and the rest of that group go to Dai's school, right? The pronouns made it a bit hard to follow. I do hope you introduce all the people you mentioned into the story at least once. I'm very interested in all of them. I'd also like to thank you for your regular updates. Your stories are the only ones I'm reading that are regularly updated. Now, I will give you the comma lesson. First off, NEVER capitalize anything but a name after a comma or any other punctuation in the middle of a sentence. Second, here are six more relatively simple rules that don't have many exceptions. I'm sure there is more than what I'm giving you, though, because the English language does that to you often. The one you already know is the "Quotation Rule." Separate dialogue from the rest of the sentence with a comma. Another easy one to remember is using a comma to separate two adjectives of equal rank. For example, "the big, gray cat." You would not use it in cases like the "old easy chair," because "easy" is considered part of the noun there. You also use commas to separate items in a list or series, such as "water, milk, juice, and soda." Commas are used to separate two independent clauses (complete sentences) joined by "and," "but," "or," "nor," "for," "yet," or "so" (i.e. I did my homework, and I walked the dog today). Be careful, though, because "I did my homework and walked the dog today" does not require a comma; there is only one complete sentence there, not two. Finally, commas are used in sentences with introductory elements, which is a word or phrase that comes before the subject in the sentence. There are exceptions to that rule, but I can't give you specific example; I only know that it's wrong when I see it. The last rule that I know concerns something called "interrupters." These are phrases or word that come in the middle of a sentence, often between the subject and the verb, and are extra information. The previous sentence just demonstrated that rule. The correct name for those is "appositive," and they come at the end of the sentence, too. They need a comma then, as well. To clarify "extra information," that is anything that can be removed from the sentence and leave it still grammatically correct with the same meaning as before. Well, that's it for the commas; I hope it was clear enough. Remember to be careful of "to," "too," and "two". "Two" is always and only used as a number; "too" describes excess (too much grammar, etc.) and is a synonym for "also" (I want that, too). "To" is used as a preposition (to the house, etc.), an adverb, and part of an infinitive (to play, to do, to be, etc). I know it's a lot to remember, but hopefully this will help. Oh, by the way, this is how you spell "meant." I also just realized that the rule for "cousin" that I mentioned earlier goes for "brother," "sister," "daughter," "son," etc., unless of course, you happen to be dealing with the Catholic Church. Isn't the English language fascinating (and confusing)?
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