|Reviews for Breath of Fire II: The Complete Story|
| Anfini00 chapter 20 . 9/4/2014
I tried reading through this, and think as a writer, you certainly need a lot of work. As some posters have stated, your portrayal of the characters seems very off, not just Nina, but it seems like every character you've written about is an obnoxious character. It was a struggle reading through this, but as I did, it seemed that Ryu disliked every party member that he encountered and I couldn't understand why your version of the characters even joined up.
Your reasoning behind everything felt too forced, as though you were following the story of the game but had no purpose. Ryu sees Bow as an annoyance, yet goes on some long adventure to find the thief to clear him, but the Ryu you're writing about seems like he would have been fine just letting Bow get caught. Nina, as well as being a far cry from the character we knew in game was so casual about killing, and wiped out the whole Joker gang while Ryu just stood there. I would think the other party members would have something against something like that. Katt changed to a passive character who loves Ryu (I think?) and is a good friend of Nina, but also competition...I'm just not sure where you were going with that whole thing, and being engaged to Tiga when she hadn't met a Woren before was either an oversight, or you're changing random things so that they've gone through all these former loves and are settling on Ryu.
All in all, I think this just wasn't a good story, you've got to work on your character development, what drives your characters and as some people have pointed out, your formatting as some points you jump from one perspective to another with no notice, and it takes several paragraphs to figure out who's POV you're writing in, if I can at all.
| Lindze chapter 20 . 6/15/2012
Following your story was quite difficult for me. I had trouble figuring out who was talking sometimes. Though your fic started out pretty interesting, I admit to skipping a bunch of the content simply because I was irritated at how you changed the original personalities and backgrounds of the characters. Did you really have to make Nina into an annoying and somewhat stuck-up I-am-royalty kind of character?
Look I understand if the Ryu/Nina pairing doesn't seem to appeal to you, but destroying her character is just going overboard. It's like you're purposely making her to be someone that readers will hate, while Katt becomes someone readers will like. Speaking of Katt, it's almost as if you made Nina and Katt switch personalities.
What's up with Jean being a womanizer? Another author did this and I hated it, but Jean and Nina are childhood acquaintances? Oh and last of all, you really should change the title of your story here because it is far from completion. Your title is misleading and because of it, I was expecting the actual complete story.
| Narwhale chapter 20 . 5/25/2012
It looks like you've been working on this for quite some time, seeing that this was first published all the way back in 05. While I understand this is your interpretation of BoFII, I'm still a little frustrated at the small changes you've made in the characters, such as Nina's personality. Please forgive me, but I just find it frustrating the way you interpret Nina. She just doesn't seem realistic or believable when she's taken out of her original character and changed into something she's not. I also have a hard time understanding who's perspective is told at times.
Still, I've enjoyed reading your story so far. What I'm most impressed with is that you've stayed committed to this story after all this time. Most stories that I've read on this website are usually abandoned and forgotten by their writers, which saddens me, because they had so much potential, yet they quit before they even started. I applaud you and give you praise for staying committed to your work. I won't tell you to change your story line just because there are a few things I'm not satisfied with, but there is always room for improvement, just be sure to always revise and proofread your story. Keep the ideas coming, and keep up the writing. Don't be one of those fools that writes a story and abandons their creation. Forgive me if my review is harsh. Good tidings!
| EmpathicTempest chapter 19 . 2/11/2012
I like some parts to your fanfic, but I can't imagine most of the changes you made to the story. Nina for one, was known to be well-mannered, shy, and reserve. You turned her into someone who's completely different from how she's suppose to be. Also, I recall that Mina was completely unaware that Nina was banished from Windia until Nina sought the powers of the Great Bird.
| Razyx chapter 19 . 1/23/2012
its not a complete story if u stop
| Ryu Bateson chapter 18 . 1/1/2011
Pretty amazing, needs more though. Waiting for the rest, man.
| Hikari chapter 18 . 11/9/2010
not bad. I am more for Katt and Ryu being together more than nina. I have read way to many of Nina/Ryu pairings that its making me sick. hell when I play the game I have ryu and katt end up together each time hehehe
| Hybrid thing chapter 1 . 11/7/2010
Great fanfiction! Loving it so far. Big Ryu/Nina fan here, just sayin'. ;) Keep it up!
| Ryu964 chapter 11 . 11/4/2010
Dam the schools! They always find some way to drain the fun from everything. The story looks great so far very detailed.
| killerion chapter 18 . 9/2/2010
Its good to see you've started updating this story again. Chapter 18 is easily the best chapter of the story, and also probably the best chapter of the any stories I've read over the years. Keep up the good work.
| bobwinkle12 chapter 17 . 8/19/2010
I have to admit; I've been following this story for years and it has been an absolute thrill ride to read. I enjoy this novelization of a classic RPG. The thing I like about this is it takes all the characters and gives them a memorable personality that the game does not give. I'm excited to see what happens next. Keep up the great work!
| zRISC chapter 16 . 7/11/2009
i must say that this novelization of BoF2 is REALLY good.
i've liked the sarcastic demeanor of both Ryu and Nina (they seem made for each other xD!)
and also, the situations as you've described them, are quite nice to read.
expecting the next chapter, Sana... want to see how jealous will the girls get when Sana flirts with Ryu.
| BoFfan chapter 1 . 10/16/2007
This is a very nice novelization, just continue plz!
| loser 101 chapter 1 . 4/4/2007
Please continue to do BOF. This story is so interesting and that's the truth.
| xanderbug4 chapter 1 . 3/1/2007
its about time someone made a really good twist to this storyline. i love bof and u need 2 keep writing so i can figure out what happens next.