Reviews for His Betrayers' Daughter
the kid chapter 20 . 10/1/2013
And I thought she couldn't GET more whiny and dependent! I'm starting to think Drac just got tired of babysitting a 1000 year old BABY!
the kid chapter 19 . 10/1/2013
Can Dracula do nothing but f#ck up his relationships with people?!
For a guy trying to reconnect with his daughter... no! I'm gonna tell YOU how this should have gone!
1) They meet up. It's not a good meeting.
2) Nasty words are exchanged on both sides
3) Drac tries to hurt her friends to force her to come back to him
4) She finally renounces him as a father
5) She stakes herself
6) Dracula now has to live with knowledge he drove daughter to suicide with his own actions
the kid chapter 18 . 10/1/2013
Is it wrong that I enjoy this stupid girl's suffering?
Her "Oh noes! My evil soulless f#ck of a father keeps hurting my friends to get to me, but I'm just gonna sit here and do ABSOLUTELY nothing" schtick is seriously dumb.
the kid chapter 16 . 10/1/2013
Truly, these are the actions of a father who wants the love of his child.
O_O { WTH?!}
the kid chapter 13 . 10/1/2013
It's always nice to see the main character have yet another emotional breakdown. How many does this one make; six?
AidoRockz chapter 21 . 11/18/2010
I really like this story and there is few of them, please continue
crusades chapter 1 . 11/8/2010
This was a bit different.

I don't totally understand why she is telling her friends her dreams. I know I tell my friends my dreams sometimes, but when they are so... haunting. Maybe she would tell them, but they seemed like they half expected it, like it was nothing, although it was being her so much pain.

This was good, no doubt, but I just wondered about that.
Alavalynn chapter 8 . 11/17/2008
Now Tif is gone. Uh oh, what's she going to do now?
Alavalynn chapter 7 . 11/17/2008
Does "Catch up" entitle that something bad is going to happen? I hope not. I like how Mary is with Dracula.
Alavalynn chapter 6 . 11/17/2008
Wow. I didn't expect Dracula to be so mean. It was kind of refreshing to see someone capture a different essence of him. Good job.
Alavalynn chapter 5 . 11/17/2008
I like the transformation part. Great job with this chapter! You have me caught in the story. Can't stop reading now.
Alavalynn chapter 4 . 11/17/2008
I liked this chapter, and I have some Constructive criticism. I think that a little more detail on the surroundings and what the characters are feeling could really help reveal to the reader's about the character. I think, if you described Morgan's fear more and went into depth on what aspects of the man feared her the most, the audience would make a better connection. This is one thing that my Beta said to me when I write, So I thought I could pass it on.

I think your story is wonderful, and I hope that I didn't offend you in any way, I don't mean to.

Keep up the good work.
Alavalynn chapter 3 . 11/17/2008
Why is she so scared of him, and why has she been hiding? I must read to find out more. Great job.
Alavalynn chapter 2 . 11/17/2008
I liked this chapter. I thought that it was a little on the short side, but I like how it was a surprise to her friends and I am going to keep reading to find out what is going to happen.
Alavalynn chapter 1 . 11/17/2008
I think this first chapter was a good start to what I can tell is going to be a very good story. I like the plot and mysteriousness of it all.

Good job. Going to go and read the rest now.
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