Reviews for His Betrayers' Daughter |
---|
![]() ![]() And I thought she couldn't GET more whiny and dependent! I'm starting to think Drac just got tired of babysitting a 1000 year old BABY! |
![]() ![]() Can Dracula do nothing but f#ck up his relationships with people?! For a guy trying to reconnect with his daughter... no! I'm gonna tell YOU how this should have gone! 1) They meet up. It's not a good meeting. 2) Nasty words are exchanged on both sides 3) Drac tries to hurt her friends to force her to come back to him 4) She finally renounces him as a father 5) She stakes herself 6) Dracula now has to live with knowledge he drove daughter to suicide with his own actions THE END! |
![]() ![]() Is it wrong that I enjoy this stupid girl's suffering? Her "Oh noes! My evil soulless f#ck of a father keeps hurting my friends to get to me, but I'm just gonna sit here and do ABSOLUTELY nothing" schtick is seriously dumb. |
![]() ![]() Truly, these are the actions of a father who wants the love of his child. O_O { WTH?!} |
![]() ![]() It's always nice to see the main character have yet another emotional breakdown. How many does this one make; six? |
![]() ![]() ![]() I really like this story and there is few of them, please continue |
![]() ![]() ![]() This was a bit different. I don't totally understand why she is telling her friends her dreams. I know I tell my friends my dreams sometimes, but when they are so... haunting. Maybe she would tell them, but they seemed like they half expected it, like it was nothing, although it was being her so much pain. This was good, no doubt, but I just wondered about that. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Now Tif is gone. Uh oh, what's she going to do now? |
![]() ![]() ![]() Does "Catch up" entitle that something bad is going to happen? I hope not. I like how Mary is with Dracula. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Wow. I didn't expect Dracula to be so mean. It was kind of refreshing to see someone capture a different essence of him. Good job. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I like the transformation part. Great job with this chapter! You have me caught in the story. Can't stop reading now. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I liked this chapter, and I have some Constructive criticism. I think that a little more detail on the surroundings and what the characters are feeling could really help reveal to the reader's about the character. I think, if you described Morgan's fear more and went into depth on what aspects of the man feared her the most, the audience would make a better connection. This is one thing that my Beta said to me when I write, So I thought I could pass it on. I think your story is wonderful, and I hope that I didn't offend you in any way, I don't mean to. Keep up the good work. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Why is she so scared of him, and why has she been hiding? I must read to find out more. Great job. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I liked this chapter. I thought that it was a little on the short side, but I like how it was a surprise to her friends and I am going to keep reading to find out what is going to happen. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I think this first chapter was a good start to what I can tell is going to be a very good story. I like the plot and mysteriousness of it all. Good job. Going to go and read the rest now. |