Reviews for Side A : Mahora Sensei Keitaro!
mnementh2000 chapter 14 . 2/27/2012
I love the last bit! Unknown pactio with Keitaro, plus with Negi, and then with Konoka - I love it. All the more so as Keitaro was completely in the dark about it. And then the cards going through transformations to adapt to the situation at hand.

Overall, fun story and well written. Could wish for more to it, though, as it just got a whole lot more interesting - as in the old Chinese curse "may you live in interesting times". You did an admirable job of crossing the two stories, I think. Interesting to see Negi and Keitaro with their roles reversed...
Lord Destroyer chapter 14 . 2/1/2009
Let Asuna be paired with Negi even if they are apart from each other at the moment, they're perfect for each other, not mention so cute together.
Hourou shunketsu chapter 5 . 7/6/2008
Woah never expected Nodoka to...you know...
Hourou shunketsu chapter 4 . 7/6/2008
Hm...Kyoto field trip arc...wonder how that's gonna happen with Negi and them in Side B...
Hourou shunketsu chapter 2 . 7/6/2008
Ah! So THIS is what Motoko meant in Side B.

I get it...
Hourou shunketsu chapter 1 . 7/6/2008
I began reading this fic because some things didn't make sense in Side B.

I guess these two stories are happening at the same time...SWEET.
mickl3 chapter 13 . 2/2/2008
What happened? I'm so confused. I'm still trying to figure out what happened during the whole eva arc and the blackout, since that didn't seem to have concluded. I thought it was a break from the story temporarily, but right now it seems like you jumped into another storyline without finishing up the last one. What about the whole journey thing in the begininng of this chapter? What brought it on? Please try to explain certain things in more detail so most of us don't get lost.
mickl3 chapter 11 . 2/2/2008
Nice chapter XD probably one of my favorites out of the ones written so far. You've done a nice job so far by integrating the two stories, since it's a little difficult, but I still think that you tend to focus more on Negi than Keitaro himself. Even if it is easir to do it that way, this is supposed to be Keitaro's side of the story, not Negi's. Anyways, so far so good, hope to see more action between Keitaro and the other students XD maybe more KaedexKetairo and help him get up to par battle skillwise.
Ancient Death chapter 14 . 7/2/2007
...Can someone explain why Evangeline left the campus?

*pouts* The story is cool execpt it keeping skipping forward without explain some things like Eva-chan's absence?
Goldamon X chapter 14 . 12/28/2006
This is a great story here. I'm looking forward to the other half of this little tale. Though i'm curious about that spell that Konoka used. Was that by chance from slayers? Well hope to see the next update soon.
Horific Albel Nox chapter 11 . 10/19/2006
Hmm interesting does this mean Keitaro can use the Byakugan or has a bloodline limit or were you just using Naruto character names

The Keitaro Kaede part was quite good very different from the normal love hina and Mahora Sensei Negima, does it mean that Keitaro won't end up with Naru or Mutsumi?

Good story
tomdj1701 chapter 14 . 10/18/2006
LOL, loved the update.
Wonderbee31 chapter 14 . 10/18/2006
Wonderful section here, and really enjoyed the battle with the girls, and will definitely be looking forward to what might happen after all this.
Final Genesis chapter 14 . 10/18/2006
Though it's been a long time since you updated, glad to see that you have some new chapters for these fics at long last! Glad we finally see Chigusa out of their lives for now! One more thing - now that we're in the later chapters do we have to read the stories as seperate or follow with Side A/Side B routine? Just thought I'd ask.

This is Final Genesis, signing out!
Caladbolg777 chapter 6 . 8/20/2006
Hi,

Hi. I hate to be direct but basically from chapter 5 to chapter 6 there is a huge disruption in the flow of the story. In other words, I was seeing a resolution to a conflict, in the chapters, that wasn't written or shown. Not writing the beginning of this conflict is basically screwing up the flow of your story to the point where it loses the reader. I personally asked myself a few times "where and when did that happen?" So I was a bit lost myself. Sorry if this sounds harsh, I am trying not to be harsh. Please forgive me if you are offended in any way.

However, some advice I have would be to add what's necessary for a conflict to arise, reach a climatic point, and resolve.

Some other advice I have is that I don't really think you need the whole Christmas chapter. That chapter begs the question of "what's the point of this chapter in the overall story?" The Christmas chapter seems to be a tangent of the actual story that wasn't necessary. I don't mean to be blunt, but as a reader the Christmas chapter bored me because it didn't really coincide with the rest of the story. And this is especially true since you have yet to mention any connections back to the chapter other than "I suppose magic really does exist." I would argue that you could write something that shows that same idea but in a much more realistic sense.

The story of Keitaro and class 2-A until that point was relatively normal and acceptable. It was a fairly normal situation with normal character actions and reactions. The Christmas chapter show's that the characters instantly belive that Santa Claus is real and that they would help Santa give gifts to everyone in the story. The whole idea, comparing it to the main plotline, is absurd and unrealistic.

My personal advice would be to delete the chapter and come up with another way to introduce magic. I couldn't tell you an example off the top of my head, but if you want one I'll think about it.

Well...I should go. Again, I'm sorry if I have offended you in any way. If you think I may have been too judgemental or you disagree with this review, please feel free to PM me. I'll reconsider, and try to help.

Please have a nice day,

Caladbolg7
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