|Reviews for Dark as Day|
| Jay chapter 1 . 9/9
Pretty good so far. I was surprised at the length of it for a first chapter.
| 00mokona chapter 20 . 3/1/2015
| Jay chapter 20 . 11/29/2014
"bleached, flat food" Did you mean wood?
"mad at your for using" you.
This was a perfect ending. It didn't really explain what happened with Sess or Kaede, but it was great all the same. Really glad it all worked out. Now I'm going to check out the rest of your works. :)
| Guest chapter 19 . 11/29/2014
Loved the way you described his transformation.
"Their fists collided with one another" this sounds as if the fists bash into each other, yet you follow up with their faces flying to the side.
"week as a young schoolboy" Weak. This was a great description.
When he had first been given that bomb, I had contemplated the idea of him using it. Then I was hoping he'd put it in Naraku's mouth & it would somehow protect him. Really hoping something good comes out of the last chapter.
| Guest chapter 18 . 11/29/2014
Congrats on winning second place! You deserve nothing less. Found several small things that you could fix.
"blouse should it be too lose" loose.
"head and stared to ask the man" started.
" circled his couching son." Did you mean crouching?
When Inu & his father start fighting, you have two sentences next to each other that are pretty much the same idea. One has "dodged & flowed" the other says "moved & flowed".
"He heard the dull thud of a punch hitting his cheek" When you first read this, it is easy to assume you mean his dad, since he is the subject of the previous sentence. However, all of a sudden his dad is over him so I'm now I'm guessing you meant Inuyasha.
""A grave mistaken on your part" you accidentally added an N.
"searching for some where" extra space after some.
Your chapters haven't failed to impress. Great job.
| Guest chapter 17 . 11/29/2014
Well, I wasn't expecting that! Especially since Naraku has called himself the leader before. This was a great chapter, but when he was dealing with Kaede & Kikyo I couldn't help but wonder if one was Naraku. Then he caught him & it furthered my theory or that Kikyo told him. Two small fixes: "stomach guard with a thing ? strap" Was this supposed to be thin strap?
"looking a mirror" You left out in.
| Guest chapter 16 . 11/29/2014
In the last chapter she was straddling him at the end. When did she move?
"The whole situation was a bit disbelieving." You may want to consider using unbelievable.
"Ignore-Your-Brother dosage" Do you mean annoy?
I'm really glad that you explained he put them in a pseudo hibernation. I had been hoping he wouldn't actually kill them, but when Kagome didn't even realize, it was a shocker. Another chapter well written. :)
| Guest chapter 15 . 11/28/2014
Well, that's one way to come out about who he is. I almost wonder if he wanted that though since he had noticed the sun setting & still didn't leave. Great chapter!
| Guest chapter 13 . 11/27/2014
I want to smack Inuyasha upside the head. I understand he was trying to protect Kagome & his mother, but still! Only noticed one tiny correction. "Naraku asked causally." Should be casually. I read right through it the first time. Good chapter.
| Guest chapter 12 . 11/27/2014
Poor Rin! I hope Kagome gets to destroy someone for messing with her baby sister. Two small things: "they'd probably think she'd done something" Do you mean he'd? Also, the kissing scene was nice, but I jumped around a bit because it was coming across extremely slow. Glad they finally kissed again. I loved the last sentence!
| Guest chapter 11 . 11/26/2014
Wow, that was a long chapter. I was happy about the way her identity came out in the fight, but the possession story was unexpected. Nice touch. I did find a few things you may consider correcting.
"We're going in through the window." Should have a quotation mark at the beginning.
"You should heed his call, yes?" Wouldn't it be her call?
Also, it may actually be in the last chapter, but when they were comparing hair, you said his golden eyes though he is supposed to be in human form.
I'm really enjoying this story so far. Wonderful work.
| Guest chapter 9 . 11/26/2014
So I am forcing myself to stop & review. This story is great so far. I've really enjoyed your twists on details such as his mutations. Until Kikyo was introduced, I also thought Naraku was talking to Kagura. I'm glad Kagome was finally called out by her real name. Though I doubt Inu heard it, I'm hoping to see a little awkwardness in her uncertainty.
| Warm-Amber92 chapter 20 . 12/25/2013
One of the best stories I have ever read! All the twist and turns were unforeseen but I wonder, what happened to Sesshomaru because surely he would want revenge?
| FallenFan77 chapter 17 . 3/18/2013
Holy hell...the ending caught me off guard and I nearly fell out of my chair lol
| withoutwingsx chapter 20 . 2/2/2013
Outstanding! Drama, horror, and romance! Not to mention the demon vs humans and reappearance of inuyashas own father! Nicely done!