Reviews for Set A Course For Freedom
RavenDove chapter 12 . 12/22/2008
I will start by saying that you have a good idea and have shown a talent for telling a story. I just need to say a few things and I don't want you to go off crying. I want you to rethink and see how you can use what I'm saying to make you work better.

You jumped through the girls psych issuse a little to quickly I think she would be more in denile and not ready to believe a word they said. You also make her sound a little too adult. How old is she? I have a six year old daughter who has a hard time understanding why her eleven year old brother and cousin are autistic and she isn't. You really need to spend time with children if you are going to write a child's voice believably.

I really think there is more to explore in this story from my point of view. I now have to struggle with living in a world that is not adapted to my lack of ability to walk without aid. I just see some things that might help this story be more believable. Especialy from the point of view your characters must have.

Please do not abandon this work, but don't be afraid to go back and edit either.

RavenDove
RavenDove chapter 10 . 12/22/2008
There is a very sad fact about the child but you don't brig sad across as well in this chapter as you have in chapters before.

RavenDove
RavenDove chapter 9 . 12/22/2008
I've got a creepy feeling about the plot. Is the child real or a mind warping creation. I guess I have to keep reading.

RavenDove
RavenDove chapter 7 . 12/22/2008
I'm sorry I haven't got back to reading this in a while. In some sad bit of irony I now have to use a wheelchair due to a spinal injury.

Thank you for spelling Bashir's name right. I'm the sort of Trekkie that can tell details about the shows that make others say I need to get a life.

You are telling a very interesting story and I need to read everything you have posted. I want to see where this goes.

RavenDove
velossian chapter 9 . 8/21/2006
I do not think Heather would have reacted in the way she did. when someone kills your best friend you emotions go haywire she would want revenge on the persion who killed her child best friend not sit around and tak
Lilith Kayden chapter 12 . 7/2/2006
Oh...! This is so close to home. I have my own disabilities, and several of my frinds have CP, and besides being in wheelchairs they speak with audio assistive technology, (a computer keyboard with picture symbols as well as alphanumeric keys, and a computer laptop that synthesizes the human voice, for composing and storing even assigned classroom presentations and speeches, or full presentations for disabilities conferences workshops) and they do very well in their lives and college classes. I'm not Brianna by a longshot; I really emphathize with Heather. They do, like Heather and Kathleen, have to struggle very very hard. But they create medaning in thier lives, and in the lives of others around them by the way that they live!

I think that this is a really important story that will help some of the temporarily ablebodied understand what personal mishaps, birth, or oldage can bring us.

I do hope that yopu will continue this story and that you will please keep updating until the story until it is truly full, has expressed all of its messages of meaning, and is entirely complete in every way. Please pursevere with this story. This is a truly great service that you are doing by your writing.

-Lilith Kayden
marinawings chapter 12 . 3/6/2006
this is an excellent story. maybe a few grammar errors or some awkward sentence structure here and there, but the content is great. this new development about brianna is fascinating. and of course, i love reading about dr. bashir. again, great job with the characters. keep it up.

(sorry it took me so long to review-i'm having computer problems)
Estel A Duath chapter 11 . 1/20/2006
what's her disability?
Kerowyn chapter 1 . 1/10/2006
I just want to point out an error in the first chapter.

You said Heather's knees were bent at a 90 degree angle. That would basically mean she is walking on her knees.

90 degrees is the angle that forms when two perpendicular lines intersect, like in an L.
marinawings chapter 10 . 1/3/2006
once again, another great chapter. i really like the way you write your characters. i can really feel what they are feeling. they're like real people. i can't wait to find out what happens next!
marinawings chapter 9 . 1/2/2006
this is a really good story. sorry it took me so long to catch up. so kathleen has a daughter? fascinating. keep up the good work! by the way, i think you're doing a great job with the characters. i really like them.
Kayla Tsukino chapter 6 . 11/27/2005
aw what a tear jerker. so sad, so do you know where you want to go from here? I hope I can help, but I've lost track of star track because I haven't watched it in so long.
RavenDove chapter 6 . 11/23/2005
This is by far the best chapter. The emotion, detail, and character all seem to mesh the way they should.

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Lyda Mae (RavenDove) Huff
RavenDove chapter 5 . 11/23/2005
Are they supose to be on the station or on the Defiant? I really can't tell. You need to define your locations more clearly. It will make the story more enjoyable for your readers.

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Lyda Mae (RavenDove) Huff
RavenDove chapter 4 . 11/23/2005
I can't help but notice that you keep misspelling dr. Bashir's name. If you ever have a question on how to spell a regular Star Trek character's name you can look them up on

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Lyda Mae (RavenDove) Huff
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