|Reviews for The Chronicles of Malus|
| Guest chapter 16 . 3/10
it is the best chapter I have ever read keep it up and you will make a great noval
| fgh chapter 18 . 7/7/2011
this is a really good story
i'm surprised that it only has 15 reviews since it is a lot better than most fanfictions out there
| Rouge Slayer chapter 2 . 4/17/2011
Another awesome ch!
| Darkfairy102 chapter 17 . 6/12/2010
That was a great story! I'm glad I went back and read it BEFORE I read the sequel.
| Darkfairy102 chapter 11 . 6/12/2010
The story's really good so far.
| Corny's Girl chapter 20 . 8/14/2007
I always love to read a story with Reinhardt, Carrie, Henry, and the gang from CV64. For me, it's the best reading of any Castlevania tale. I especially like the way you take the original story and then add your own little ideas here and there. And yes, oh yes, I am EXTREMELY saddened with Corny's passing...but I suppose it just had to be...poor little wolfie...(sniffle, sniffle). Anyway, good story, and keep up the great writing. :)
| hard critict chapter 1 . 2/17/2006
I am a critict and 2 things
hell all that insult this gift from god
... ARE... GOD!
| Aaron Ducharme chapter 1 . 2/5/2006
this is the best story I have read here. dont e-mail me back I am saying I am a huge malus fan to. And trust me I am a critict I love 64 dont like most others. I read it 2 times acctully this story is aswome. you are the best story writer here. Oh ya and write more malus storys! where he lives others make him die well I have to wrap it up tata.
| Adventures chapter 20 . 1/8/2006
...Wh00t! That was awesome! It sucks that this story only has 8 reviews. Because it was really good. o.o
| Lhrayven Glacierwind chapter 17 . 11/19/2005
Now I am finished and I have read both the good and bad ending. You picked up Dracula's personality quite well. I know another author who made more of a 'Joke' out of poor Drac then giving him his original personality. Either you study the game info and storyline well or you actually got the chance to play the game. I unforunately have not had the pleasure to play the game, though I did hear it was bad, I'd still give it a play. Or maybe you did both research and play and combined the two. In any case, whatever you did, you stuck well to the character personalities. There were a few things I did notice however and these are simple things you can improve upon. Combat battles are short lived. They are not vivid nor are they terribly descriptive. In addition there was unnecessary repetition. Usually you have to read a story copious times before catching these things sometimes. Then again this is quite a long story, but the chapters were fairly short and I liked that. Lastly, your story had pretty good humor, which I did enjoy greatly. Wonderful story, good up the good work and keep writing. We need better writers like you on and other places for fiction.
| Lhrayven Glacierwind chapter 5 . 11/10/2005
Told you I'd review again only because I noticed something that was occured on more then one occassion now. You seem to do quite a bit of "Tell" and not enough of "Show". "Show don't tell," is the writers rule I refer to. You definately have great potential in writing I can definately see that; however, you need to do more indepth describing. It doesn't hurt to describe situations, scenes, characters, etc... To Show is to show throughout a story a characters motives, their personality, etc...To tell is to give everything away and not allow the reader to find that bit of information out later. Just keep this in mind and I know you can improve your writing.
| Lhrayven Glacierwind chapter 4 . 11/10/2005
One thing "It was the son of the priest and the dark lord incarnate." You should not have given that way in words, it should have been discovered over time. I felt disappointed to see that. You're writing is pretty good and I must say this is definately one of the better fanfics I have read. I plan on writing another review or two once I get through the entire story. Keep up the great writing.
| A Shining Armour chapter 20 . 10/26/2005
Lol, I always find that bad ending creepy (Will you be my bride?) Yeah, Malus scares me.
I'm So sorry I didn't review earlier, I didn't check for updates. Sorry!
About your writing...there's nothing wrond with your vocabulary, adjectives, etc. I want to help you become a better writer, so here's my critique:
-your battel scenes ought to be more lengthy. It will help your story grow in length and it helps the readers visualoze what's going on. All too often you simply state they had a battle and then say whether they won or lost. You're depriving people of nice gory action scenes (and this is Castlevania)
-try not to state things too obviously. Most recent example, when Malus is talking to Carrie. It's blatantly stated that he has an evil plan and it will come into effect later. Try and go for more of an understatement instead. Otherwise you suck out all the fun of trying to guess (even if we do know what happens)
-I can't remember if you did this alot, but you need to use more variety in sentence structure. Like...you need short ones, long ones, skinny ones and fat...lol. sorry
M...I can't think of anything else right now. I liked your story...it was great! Just listen to my advice and you'll do even better...see ya 'round!
P.S. If there are spelling mistakes in my review I'm sorry I was writing it all down as it came!
| A Shining Armour chapter 15 . 10/24/2005
M...interesting. That's all I've really got to say, lol. Seriously, I liked Carrie's character, you really stuck to the game (she's like the heroine of my fic, she's so cool) (but in mine she's got spunk) but you give Reinhardt too much credit, lol. I never really liked him, in all honesty. You have a nice vocabulary, confusing at imes, even. I love Malus too, I feel so sarry for the boy. But I hate you for killing off COrnell though, lol. CRUELEST THING EVER!
You really made time fly by in this fic...one problem is you wrote it assuming that we already knew what happened and have already played the game. It needs more depth. Otherwise, nice job! Keep it up!
P.S. I know I make alot of references to my own fic in this, but that's cuz I just se so many similarities yet so many differences between our fics...it's kinda weird. That's why I read your fic in the first place!
| A Shining Armour chapter 7 . 10/24/2005
NO! CORNELL'S DEAD! Shishkabobs!