Reviews for Uzumaki Harry
Morbious20 chapter 23 . 4/30/2012
Awesome chapter
Kurohyoneko chapter 14 . 4/29/2012
Dude, two words: Scene breaks. You've got a great story and I can't stop reading, but hell if it ain't confusing when the scene changes out of the blue.
Ichigo Mirai chapter 23 . 4/29/2012
yay! another update! _ still very very good! loved this actually! wonder what'll happen next... please update whenever you get the chance!
misteryman526 chapter 19 . 4/29/2012
McNinja's? How dare you make up some newfangled burger chain when there is already a perfectly good chain of Ninja Burger restaurants? Since you're obviously ignorant, I suggest you Google it so you will know the goodness that is Ninja Burger before they come to drown you in Wasabi sauce as punishment for your crime.
Emilx311 chapter 23 . 4/28/2012
I love this story so much, it has to be the best crossover I've ever read! Can't wait to read more!

Crystal M. Key chapter 23 . 4/28/2012
That was pretty funny. Thanks! But really, I get that you had to disclaim there being no Sue, but why was there no polka? I was fully expecting polka. Oh well. And who was the girl with the top-hat? She seems interesting… Favorite quotes since last time:

Rita Skeeter, who'd been invited to the funeral, just stared at Harry, her brain grinding in place uselessly as she encountered a situation she'd never truly thought existed: someone who acted so outrageously that she didn't have to write one false thing about them. Her instinct towards sensationalism warred with her lack of journalistic integrity…

"Well, obviously," Cedric said when the four Champions next got back together in the deserted classroom, "The Second Task involves having to put up with you. That's the only activity that could cause such pain."

Harry glared at him. "Can we focus here?"

"Yes, be zerious," Fleur admonished.

"Listen to the beautiful girl," Harry agreed.

"Ve probably 'ave to vatch 'im tap dance as vell," Fleur said.

Harry glared at her.

"And sing," added Viktor.

"All right, I get I'm a pain in the ass, can we get back to work now?" Harry said, exasperated. "Man, you guys really aren't as funny as I am."

The three looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"Well, yes, but when everyone raised their hand, I didn't want to be left out. It's sort of my thing, after all," Hermione said primly.

"Then why are you in this class?" Ron asked.

"To keep an eye on Harry, obviously," Hermione said. "He might do something in appropriate. No, scratch that, he'll definitely do something inappropriate."

"Hermione!" Harry cried, looking wounded. "I thought we were friends!"

"We are," Hermione assured him. "That's why I'm only trying to stop you instead of cursing you unconscious and locking you in a closet."

"Ooh, kinky," Lee Jordan said.

"Though we're glad Harry's not in the closet," Parvati said.

"No points, that one was too easy," Fred said.

"Someone's happy," Hermione said dryly. "What's the occasion?"

Grinning, Harry showed her the contents of his package. It was a book, with a colorful cover depicting Sirius. It looked like a file photo, and depicted him when he'd been arrested. The title, in large letters, was A Sirius Scandal: The Strange Case Of Sirius Black, by Rita Skeeter.

Hermione quickly began to scan the contents. "Sent to Azkaban without a trial… evidence destroyed… eye-witness testimony laughable… " she muttered out loud, looking up at Harry. "Harry, this is…"

"A very scandalous study of Sirius's trial," Harry said, smiling. "With candid interviews from one of those who encountered Sirius the year before, when he broke into Hogwarts. I thought, purely in my position as an editor, that it would make for a very interesting read…"

Ron whistled. "Uh oh…"

"Is any else disturbed we're actually seriously considering this?" Cedric asked.

"Yes," the other two said.

"Hey," Harry protested mildly.

"Anyone else even more disturbed they're considering saying yes?" Cedric asked again.

"Yes," the other two said again.


Hyuuga Hinata was a good girl.

In fact, give her an orange swirly mask and a nice cloak, and she'll prove it!

Yuuhi Kurenai stared up at the sky.

"Hinata-chan?" she said mildly from where she lay on her back.

"H-hai, Kurenai-sensei?"

"Exactly where did you learn that fire jutsu?"


"And why do you have a supply of these so-called 'Dungbombs'?"


"I believe it would be advantageous to us to no longer leave Hinata-san's training in pyrokinetics to her own discretion," Shino suggested from where he was using a spoon to dig individual graves for the fallen members of his colony. "In the long run, it will probably be better for team morale."

"B-because we will all grow closer together as teammates?" Hinata ventured.

"That as well," Shino said, moving a tiny pebble over a recently filled mini-grave and patiently painting on the dead insects name. Jimminy Billybob 176631, you will be missed… "But I was thinking more of how it will mean we will be able to avoid burn wounds and the deaths of our nasal passages…"


The other champions trailed behind him, tethered to his broom by their lines.

"I wonder how much trouble we're going to be in when we get back up," Cedric said brightly.

"Don't be defeatist Cedric," Victor said.

"'E eez right," Fleur said. "Ve might die and not 'ave to go back!"

Harry looked over his shoulder and glared at them. "Hey, I'm the one who makes the bad jokes in this group, darn it! Stop stealing my only contribution!"

"Wow," Harry said. "If this were a movie or something, that would have been awesome!"

Fleur rolled her eyes and shot another curse at the Grindylows.

"Cedric! Viktor! Back to back with us!" Harry called, sniping at the little water demons. "Hey, get away from my broom you little sea monkeys!" A shadow passed over him, and he looked up in time to snap a spell and stop a repeat. "Fleur, watch the area under us! We've got two more directions to watch now!"

The two other Quidditch players had moved to watch each other's backs. Their playing experience had taught them to watch all three axis, and from the number of jets coming from them, they were quite enthusiastic to finally be able to hit back in this situation.

As the squid faded back into the water and they were breathing sighs of relief, Fleur cocked her head, raising a hand. "Do you 'ear zhat?"

Cedric and Viktor frowned, shaking their heads, but Harry cocked his head to the side too. "Is that… singing?"

"Accapella," Fleur said critically, and sniffed. "Zhey need more mid-rangez."

"How you know?" Viktor asked.

"Zchool choir," Fleur said. "Four years."

"Gabrielle!" Fleur cried as a tentacle snaked down to the smaller girl.

A jet of superheated bubbles flashed, stinging the reaching tentacle, which recoiled. "Protect the loli!" Harry cried.

"Accio!" Cedric and Viktor chorused, and Gabrielle stopped her downward drift.

"Hang on, Harry!" Cedric cried. "Hang on! Stay with me!"

What a stupid thing to say. Of course Harry was hanging on. Look, his dagger was still in his hand, so he hadn't let it go! Now, if they'd only do something about this pain in his side, he'd be just dandy, right cute girl with the top hat flying next to him?

The platforms were in chaos as they landed, Harry's feet scrapping along the ground, a length of tentacle still wrapped around him. People were crying, and he could vaguely make out Ginny and Hermione's voices. Someone grabbed him roughly, and he let out an involuntary cry. He heard Cedric yelling, saw Luna chatting pleasantly with the girl in the top hat as blackness overcame him…

Professor Dumbledore laughed, his hands clapping in applause. "Yes, yes, I believe you have made your point my lady, gentlemen."

"There was a point?" Bagman said, confused.

"As they are implicitly pointing out," Dumbledore said, "they were all involved in the alleged violation of the rules. Thus, no one person bears responsibility," his twinkle-to-eye ratio went up.

"It's the same thing!" Karkaroff snapped as light dawned on the other champions.

"Point in fact, Headmaster, it is not," Cedric, Quidditch Captain and veteran of much quibbling over the rules, said.

"Wah! Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto cried, staring at where Kakashi had been cut in half by the two demon brothers. "He died so young!"

"Naruto…" Sakura said.

"We will miss you, Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto wailed, tears streaming down his eyes, "Don't worry, we'll take your lessons to heart! Okay, dibs on his wallet."

Behind him, Kakashi sighed and bopped the blonde one. "Naruto, get up."

"AH! It's the ghost of Kakash-sensei, here to make out with Myrtle-neechan!"
BlackLadyCharon chapter 23 . 4/28/2012
You wonderful, horrible, awful, entertaining person! You finally update this just when I was beginning to despair of such a joy happening, and make me laugh my ass off! All of the champions lying through their teeth about who was actually responsible for them working together, the giant squid... everything about this was priceless! *Hugs you.* Never, ever change, and update this more often!
BRD man chapter 21 . 4/28/2012
"Meanwhile, back at the farm…" funny farm?
Bad Wolf Jen chapter 23 . 4/28/2012
It's nice to see a update
terafonne chapter 23 . 4/28/2012
Hahaha! Dibs on his wallet! Whenever I want a laugh ,I read your story!
Stina Whatever chapter 23 . 4/28/2012
Crazy as always, and I really liked Fleur's moment of glory
Veryfairygirl14 chapter 23 . 4/28/2012
Sirius/Anko?...I APPROVE! I am also psyched that you updated! AND IT WAS AN AWESOME CHAPTER! This shows that procrastinating on homework and scrolling on fanfiction does have benefits!
theNewDesire chapter 23 . 4/27/2012
Wonderful! Now the question is, was the girl in the top hat Death or Deedee?
Wonderbee31 chapter 23 . 4/27/2012
Wow! Great see more of this, and Harry was in top form there, especially with the snark, either thinking or spoken, and won't it be fun to see how the other judges are likely gnashing their teeth at all the unfairness, in their head anyway LOL.
Ryuus2 chapter 23 . 4/27/2012
Hiya! Long time no review. Then again, long time no update, so I suppose it balances out.

Of all the things Harry is-Casanova, necrophiliac, proud pervert, sexual deviant, and other stuff I've probably forgotten-he is not a pedophile. Except for Hinata. And maybe Ginny. OK, so maybe he is a pedophile.

Three bloody noses and only one from Harry? That just doesn't feel right...

I'd have made Krum the bait. He's the one who tempted she-who-should-not-be-tempted and brought that-which-none-wish-to-face down upon them. I'd go back for him, of course, but only after he'd learned his lesson.

You just had to throw Illya and Kuro in. And Death-chan. Actually, none of them being there surprised me at all. They're like Harry: you just love putting them in where they aren't supposed to be :)

Which is worse: eaten by squid, or screwed by squid? It is a question which will flutter through the halls of debate for eons to come. But it'll probably be easier to answer than that one about the chicken and the egg.

Question: "Harry, was almost getting eaten-or worse-by the giant squid worth getting tongue from Fleur?"

Harry has just successfully proven one of my fundamental rules of existence: the truth is more unbelievable than an array of lies. That is saying something when the lie is a three-fold tale of seduction, counter-seduction, and coercion.

And thus they've finally set out on the Wave Mission. I'm torn between wanting you to cover that, and waiting to see the condensed version Sasuke and Naruto tell Harry when he gets back in the summer. Hmm...Harry should be back in time for the Chunnin exams, right? I wonder if he'll be able to participate? Fanon twaddlespeak about letting a lone competitor act as a team aside, the rules clearly state 'a team of three', so how would Harry pull it off?

Also, congrat's on finally scoring over 1000 reviews for this!

Keep up the great work!
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