|Reviews for Little Black Death Note|
| Awsomeangel chapter 6 . 2/26
Interesting and well written. :) I would rather not anger you, but I just wanted to say: L is the only one allowed to come close to defeating Light! And Light can never be defeated! No offence. Umm... The plot makes a lot of sense, which is nice, and you really captured the awesome-badass-ness of Light.
| knight chapter 20 . 5/21/2013
I think this is a very good crossover! I must say when L died I was incredibly excited. The death was extremely poetic but it be very humourus if L returned and began to find out about Light's evil plan. Also after the cellphone incident I came to respect him more as a very smart guy "L". However I love this so far and the fact you continued his killings and how he is manipulating the people around him. This is the Light I know! Good story so far I am more intrigued for it to continue.
| Dante chapter 1 . 10/7/2012
Nice xover. I truly like how you used Ryuk, and the (lack of) reaction from Kira.
However i can't help wondering how you could hand wave the death of Voldemort so easily. The f**king magic Hitler is dead! And nobody is even celebrating it?!
Also, I think Raito would never mention Kira first. Is more likely other character (Harry or Snape, as they are already suspecting something) would found about the relation Kira-Raito while investigating him.
And to finish, it's a bit hard understanding who is talking at each moment. Don't be afraid of using discursive verbs! -said Dante.
Sorry if I was to harsh and for bad english. Keep writing!
| Guest chapter 1 . 9/7/2011
I'm sorry, I really tried to read this chapter, but there is simply too much dialouge! There is a serious need to have more detail and the only large paragraph was too big even, and should be spaced out for easy reading.
The comparison in the beginning was fine, more detail was needed, but it was okay. However, it started to go downhill and sounded a lot more like crack, unless you aimed for that in the beginning...?
Maybe you can flesh it out by adding more descriptions and angst over the deaths. For example, instead of "It was a bloody fight", you could have written: "Lightning flashed and the dark scene was illuminated for the briefest moment, but enough to reveal the dark splatters of blood around the battlefield. Fallen bodies lay about the ominous scene, but Harry could not bring himself to find out their identities. Not when he was so close to defeating his nemesis forever. Two pairs of eyes gleamed brightly when lightning dashed across the dark night sky- one red, one green. So different, yet so similar."
The background knowledge about Harry during the battle also seemed quite out of place, and maybe you should have saved it for later or put it at the very start.
It is only my not so humble opinion, but there is a rushed feeling about this story, which destroys the dark imagery you are trying to bring about. Another option would be to separate the dark scene from the interview, which would effectively allow you to have different feels to the different chapters.
| TheOrchid chapter 20 . 1/14/2011
Uwa, I thought you were going to finish this story? But anyways, *applause* nice plot. Finally, someone who will not end up trying to kill poor Raito! How cute though, Raito's toys think that they will succeed over Raito (or something..?)... Ufu, but so far they have failed it's adorable. I do wish that they'd use better reasons to try to find out about Raito's "secret". I mean, from what I can tell, Draco is geting a bit pissy about Harry's training... Blaise is creeped out... And Snape thinks that Raito is too prefect? *snort* of course he is. Please update soon .
| StrawberIceream chapter 5 . 7/3/2010
Yeah, I agree, Raito is awesome because he's a heartless psychopath who has a god-complex. He's one of my favorite manga/anime characters of all time!
The way you portrayed Raito is just perfect. But, I'm curious: What happened to Ryuuku?
But I love L too. L is awesome in his own awkward way, but Raito just pwns :D
| Seth-Note chapter 6 . 6/30/2010
LMAO! you do realise that in the 1st paragragh, you say " Draco and he were as tight as never", i found that sooo funny! *grins happily* just thought i should tell ya, since you said sorry. well, now to carry on reading this chapter.
| Seth-Note chapter 2 . 6/30/2010
this is pure awesomeness! prussia would aproove of it! w, I really like this story, cant wait to get o the end!
| Seth-Note chapter 1 . 6/30/2010
make light less evil.. even though u have already written 100,000 words..
| Miss Mello chapter 1 . 6/1/2010
I laughed out loud at the second sentence;
'Light versus Dark.'
Because of LIGHT Yagami you get it? XD This is soo lame humor.. I'm not going to bore you with it anymore XD
| sama-chan chapter 3 . 4/19/2010
i lurves L! L and raito forever! he should totally come into the story!
| tearsfalldownmycheeks chapter 20 . 2/13/2010
Awesome story! I love it, and all the CCS characters you've been throwing in.
| Crescent-Moon-Love chapter 19 . 11/10/2009
No long author note! That's weird! So, having not read this in like a year or something I'm getting back into it! So good! So please don't take so long to update! Please! Umm, back to the story...yay! Remus and Raito are together...kinda, but whatever its still kinda cute even tho Raito is using Lupin...and Marukai is freaking awesome in a disturbing way lol. I'm liking his personality even is he is blunt and creepy...opps, I just looked at when this story was last updated and...urgh, that's not fair man! [
Anyways its good and you better get back to it!...or not...whatever!
| RuByMoOn17 chapter 19 . 11/8/2009
this fic is very interesting! keep it up!
| LynnKurosaki chapter 2 . 8/27/2009
So Light has a different Shinigami then the one in the anime/manga? but this one also likes apples?