|Reviews for A Christmas gift for Monica|
| coolmarauders chapter 1 . 3/11/2006
Cute. You might want to think about the dialogue being less formal- use more contractions. Not many people use 'We shall'. At least, not many that I know.
Also, Quiddish is Quidditch. That was bothering me.
| Crookshanks22 chapter 1 . 2/9/2006
This one is charming, too- so cosy and wholesome. I notice that you're writing a lot of dialogue, so two quick suggestions: (1) use commas when you need them (i.e., more than you presently do!). Think of a comma as a slight pause in conversation. (2) when writing conversation, think carefully about whether to use formal English ("she is") or contractions ("she's"). In informal conversation, people (especially people like Ron) tend to use a lot of contractions, and subtle cues like this can make your dialogue flow better and sound more authentic.
I'll look forward to reading more!
| Possum132 chapter 1 . 2/6/2006
What lovely owl accessories, I loved the references to little Pigwigeon, of course he will want a beak warmer if Hedwig has one!
| Luna Obsessed chapter 1 . 12/23/2005
That was sweet, I'll have to check out Dead-Luthien’s fic sometime.
Nice beginning with the pygmy puffs :P
| Dead-Luthien chapter 1 . 12/23/2005
This is the best Christmas gift I ever got! I love it. Wow. Thank you very much! I'm also working on a Christmas oneshot. It will be about Charley, Monica and her family.
I'm off to read the other stories too.