Reviews for Not as Expected
Ghost of Meat chapter 6 . 6/9/2006
HMM you didnt by chance base some of this off of the stuff from Xenogears did you, im finding a lot of similaritys in the way you describe the Mark units and the Gears they use.
Beowulf31486 chapter 6 . 4/18/2006
Not a bad chapter. There are still some small grammars that I have found, but like I said last time, they aren't enough to detract from the story. There was some nice introspective from the characters and it is nice to see Rei's character slowly change. Can't wait to see what happens next.
nick2951 chapter 6 . 2/7/2006
Intense chapter. I hope it does lead back to NERV. Update soon.
Lone Wulffe chapter 6 . 2/7/2006
Good chapter. Shinji's background adds meat to the story, and you managed to give the JA incident enough divergence from the original line to make it worth reading. Keep it up.
Lone Wulffe chapter 5 . 2/7/2006
Finally got around to reading this one properly. Good story so far; I like the way MESSIAH's rattling NERV's and SEELE's cages ever so thoroughly. The technicalities are a bit tough to swallow all at once, but it adds realism to the story. All in all, good story. Oh, and it's nice to see "the smile" wasn't forgotten. _
KoalaKiller chapter 4 . 2/6/2006
Yet another poor attempt at retelling the Eva series. People still can't think of original beginnings. I've read a hundred similar stories before, and only a few have been able to impress me over the many years and this one is barely around average.

You may not like my words, and I may seem harsh but I have to say I didn't feel anything that reminds me of the Eva magic, this seems both rushed and poorly thoughtout.
Innortal chapter 5 . 2/6/2006
Excellent work, excellent idea for the Fifth. I look forward to seeing how things will fair for Asuka's arrival.
Innortal chapter 6 . 2/6/2006
Very deep. Well done, and great addition to the plot.
Havock chapter 6 . 2/5/2006
when the jet alone gone nuclear rei slips and lands on the jet alone as yumi jumps out then the jet alone blows up and rei goes excuse me
Beowulf31486 chapter 5 . 2/5/2006
Good stuff. This is a highly interesting take on Eva. Storyline wise, this story is great, and I love the way that you have devoloped the characters and how you continue to develop them. The only tiny complaint that I have has to do with spelling errors, but they are tiny and insignificant. You get your point across and that is what really matters. I can't wait to read the next chapter.
nick2951 chapter 5 . 1/31/2006
This is a great update and I love what you have done with Shinji and his personality. I am curious to see how Rei is able to sync with Unit 01, I hope you can explain that at some point.
Rawrr chapter 5 . 1/30/2006
Great chapter ). Since you wanted me to tell you specifics about Shinji, I'll just start with that. And this fic is awesome, one of my favorites, so don't think that I don't like it.

The only thing about Shinji that I don't like is that he is a bit OOC. He is completely confident, a great fighter, nice, loud, and a bit of an asshole. He basically has no weaknesses. Even when he gets hurt its because he was still held in place, making it not his fault. When Rei tries to slap him, he catches her hand and tells her off. When he is nice to his friends, it seems out of character and kind of forced. He is 13 years old...come on. Even if instead of becoming a shy mouse, Shinji took the other route and became loud and overconfident on the surface to make up for his insecurities that came from his father, he would at least have some weakness. Shinji seems kind of like an Asuka that cares for his friends a little superficially. By making a Shinji with no weaknesses, how can the character develop? It seems like hes just going to be a loudmouth throughout the fic, will continue to have no problems and be the best without even being close to humble about it. What made Shinji Shinji was his personality; he was shy, soft-spoken, brave, caring, etc. At times the remains of his personality seem a bit forced. He will take Touji's punch feeling guilty about hurting his little sister, and then will break Touji's nose the next day, which will take a while to heal. Where's his kindness there?

Rei is still in character, as well as Misato, Ritsuko, and the rest of the cast. Yumi is one of my favorite characters...she actually seems like she is nice and that niceness is nothing forced.

And again, this fic is great and my disliking Shinji has nothing to do with this fic. It is very well written, and i cant believe you made a whole organization in such detail for it. Great idea. You probably like this Shinji though, and this is your fic, so keep him the way you wish. I just wanted to tell you why I did not like him. This is my no means a flame. I don't have an email address to send this to, so I had to post it here. Please delete this if you can after you read it.
Muji Kirio SinWeaver chapter 5 . 1/30/2006
Hm... really? A 1st Lieutenant hm? Alrighty. I have a question though... What will happend to that Mana girl. I really don't know that character but... Anyways, I hope that Jet Alone will burn through hell! I don't like the Jet Alone, it can be used against you too easily (AhemSEELEAhem). In a millitary standpoint, don't trust automatic computers. They can be used against you... Update soon!

-Takashi Roiji (First Lieutenant 1LT)
Muji Kirio SinWeaver chapter 4 . 1/29/2006
Things are starting to heat up. With SEELE and MESSIAH racing to complete their MP Mechas, the maintenance crew has already arived. Plus, the Fifth Angel is coming closer. Man, I can't wait! Update soon plz!

-Takashi Roiji (First Lieutenant 1LT)
aledeth chapter 4 . 1/29/2006
I have to say, the thought and work that you have put into creating the whole MESSIAH organization and its technology is awesome.

Even if it is all just amalgamations from other Giant Robo Animes, you made something quite new and very interesting. The level of detail that you put in with the MESSIAH units, the small bits of info on how they work, it's all very well done, and makes this story a true pleasure to read.

Some grammar and spelling issues keep this from being as great as it could be, but they are not glaring.

The one spelling issue that I am curious about is the Mark Eldridge unit. All the other names like Strife and Sin have some sort of meaning, but Eldridge doesn't. I'm wondering if you maybe meant Eldritch instead, because that word has a cool, kinda strange meaning like Strife/sin do. On that same line, maybe Ziel is supposed to be Zeal instead? This is all just blind speculation on my part though.

Overall, this is a very nice, original story. The new characters blend in with the canon ones amazingly well, and no one seems rediculously perfect(Mary Sue-ish).

I hope to see more of this in the future. Keep up the good writing.
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