|Reviews for A Secret Uncovered|
| Elmonica chapter 15 . 10/19
I realize I'm about ten years too late but a few things have been troubling enough the I must point them out, I have no doubt that you probably have worked on improving these things within the years but it was troubling enough.
First of all, thank goodness you don't overuse the cursed word that is said. Sadly you wound up giving me a growing hatred for stated instead given it's used far too often. You improved on not using stated too often but it still shows up more than it should, like an unwelcome house guest.
Next, sometimes you use the right its & your but others you don't. You do realize that its is actually used for a possession of something such as "the tree lost its branches," right? It's is used to replace it is. I've seen a few times in the entire story where you used it's for a possession & it is branches would make little sense.
Same goes for your, you're is short for you are. I wouldn't say "you are favorite color is purple." I would actually use "your favorite color is purple." Although, I don't know if it truly is, it's mine. Just needed an example is all.
I know those could of been slip ups & you prpbably would of had no idea that someone taking the train to work would actually be reading this & saying "wrong your" out loud for the other passengers to look at them funny. I know I would of never imagined that in 2006, fanfics while on the go? What a dream come true!
One last thing that's a comment purely on this chapter. You completely forgot that there's a guest bedroom in the ops center. Danny mentioned it in Kindered Spirits & I assume this chapter was written after that episode aired given a few chapters ago had an author's note with opinions on Reality Trip which was the end of that season.
Usually I let the small things slide such as the fact that Danny does not like toast. A lot of good fics were written either during the run of season two or when we had the Danny Phantom drout after Reality Trip, making people in the states wait over a year to get the entirety of season three. Urban Jungle being aired in 2006 does not count! Middle of the season, I still hold a grudge against Nick for that. Anyways, we didn't know Danny doesn't like toast until season three so I let that pass. Things that should be known, in this instance the spare room, I'm not so forgiving on.
It also feels like in earlier chapters that you completely forgot that Doctor's Disorders even existed. We were introduced to the biology teacher there as well as Paulina suffering from the ghost sense so she should remember what it is.
All the negative things aside, so far I am enjoying it. It's nice seeing the entire student body as well as extended family interacting with Danny after the secret is out. They needed to do something more like this in the show instead of what we did get in the reveal episodes.
That said, this thing is riddled with mistakes because I'm typing it on my phone, don't disregard my tips because of it. If autocorrect messed anything up, I can't check since for some reason, I can't scroll up. Also, I know I messed up in some places, I am very sorry.
| Heatherstrike chapter 24 . 9/17
| No.311 chapter 24 . 8/11
Awesome job you did here. I really liked your villanous plot, and I'm looking forward to Danny going to Clockwork to fix it- wait, what am I saying, I meant the last chapter. Woops.
| violet3745 chapter 24 . 8/5
I cried when I heard jazz die. it's not fair! Danny needs her!
| violet3745 chapter 24 . 8/5
Plz continue! I need to know how it ends! jazz can't die! she just can't! oh why lord!? why?! she never hurt no body! bring jazz back! plz!
| mikaela2015 chapter 24 . 7/8
Are you gonna update soon?
| Liza Mondragon chapter 24 . 6/29
Anyway, I loved this fic, even though the characters were a little OOC at first. Please update soon!
Seriously, though. It's been three years!
| Guest chapter 24 . 6/16
Are you really gonna let us suffer for more years? It's been like 3 years now! Come on update JUST ONE MORE CHAPTER
| A Vivid Reader chapter 24 . 5/18
What do you mean if you got a year I WAS BAWLING MY EYES OUT. Seriously, amazing job. There has been only two books, writte . By professionals with years and years of experience that's ever made me shed a tear. That's all it was, a few tears, but this made me grab my tissues. Well done.
| The-Unnamed-Artist chapter 24 . 5/15
That long anon post was me - the one with the guess of what will happen.
Wasn't logged on!
| Guest chapter 24 . 5/15
OHHHHHHH love it! For some reason i think Jazz dying was the best to kill off - as weird as that is to say. It meant the most to him and effects him dearly - not that the others deaths wouldn't.
But he has two parents, two friends and only ONE sister. Although the others deaths would have hurt him just as much, this affects him such a different way than the others would, no more just different.
For some reason I want to take a guess here: he's going to clockwork, clock work says no...Danny blows up but ClockWork explains the consequences of changing it all black (Evil danny is still alive). He somehow sends Danny out of his home only for Danny to wander the ghost zone back to tell his parents the tragic news when he sees Jazz...as a ghost** (with unfinished business - saying goodbye to her brother). Ends with Jazz saying to tell her family she loves them through Danny or Jazz overshadows Dannys human body in order to tell them herself and hug them for one last time before moving on. End SCENE
**Full ghosts are 'evil' yes but ONLY if they don't complete there unfinished business. If she does then no fight breaks out!
| Guest chapter 23 . 5/15
| Guest chapter 22 . 5/15
ahhhhh why is this so sad :,,,(
| Guest chapter 24 . 5/12
So where is that nice round number? And I just want to say that your story had so much emotion in it. I cried when jazz died, but what made me cry say the way u wrote it just perfect. I'm waiting on that nice round 25
| Salinedreamsxena chapter 24 . 5/12
you never posted that final chapter. Years later I reread this and my heart tears in half all over again and I am left wondering how it ends. AAAHHHHHHHHHH
I understand though. This is how a lot of DP fics end up. I enjoyed every minute of this fic even reading it again at the age of 23. :)