|Reviews for Things you do not wish to|
| Migranes chapter 15 . 9/1/2009
I really liked how emotions of the characters were portrayed. Very nicely written.
| Number Six-Sixtysix chapter 15 . 8/6/2009
| Where the gras is greener chapter 15 . 11/18/2007
Ee... You could have skipped the 20 years later part. And I'm willing to bet your birthday is April 22.
The double POV had been an interesting concept though I have to point out that your approach was rather tedious to read. You should have left large portions out, for example a speech. It is a good idea to show the inner workings during the same events but revelling them a second time in minute detail is just too much.
I have played the game only a number of times I could count one-handed so I cannot comment on the characters but most of their actions had been reasonable. Not all, mind you (the threat of killing morgan in the early chapters, the lack of joy on discovering more survivors of Planetfall, ...)
And the science part, well, in suspension of disbeliefs is acceptable. If it wasn't Scifi.
All in all a nice story which can be easily read without any preknowledge of the game.
| Jose Cohen chapter 15 . 10/10/2006
Finally read the end of the story. Nice. Except for
* 20 YEARS LATER *
Oh, my. However, I'm willing to forgive because the ending is sweet and beautiful.
| Jose Cohen chapter 7 . 4/26/2006
Well done. I give this story full points for originality. ;) I still am undoubtedly the victim of my own prejudices, as Lal comes across as slightly informal in the latest chapter. From the voiceovers in Alpha Centauri, I always had an impression of him as being a very somber character with an air of sadness. It was a little hard for me to imagine him exclaiming over the commlink.
Otherwise, though, I am still liking this story, and I am interested to find out how the aging issue turns out.
| Jose Cohen chapter 4 . 4/9/2006
Nicely written. A couple of points:
1) I felt that switching between the two viewpoints (above and below that solid line deely) was just a little awkward at times, especially when a lot of it was the same. I feel it was a little difficult to read through all that for a couple of differences.
2) I thought Morgan seemed a little two-dimensional in the parts where he appears (the scene with the juice). Maybe it's my personal view on the character creeping in, but I would have figured Morgan to be a little more clever and subtle than he seems in that scene.
These are just sort of nitpicks, though. Overall I like this story very much.
| al chapter 1 . 3/11/2006