Reviews for The Guide to Writing an Acclaimed Best Seller
jazzy chapter 1 . 7/11/2013
Awesome advice. This must work for a lot of writers.
Nymphadora1506 chapter 2 . 4/29/2011
Um...I actually like Dan Brown a lot but this is hilarious! Bobert is cool...haha...
Isis the Sphinx chapter 2 . 7/6/2009
Oh, this is hilarious. I suggest going to Mei1105's work, and clicking on her c2, the Anti-Cliche and Mary-Sue Elimination Society. Perhaps you have heard of it?

Keep writing!
TheDayYouSaidGoodnight chapter 2 . 6/25/2009
This is so hilarious! I wish there would be hope to go through with this. Especially the EvilbutMisguided!Fanatic whom I think is unmistakable.
Jaeh chapter 2 . 3/31/2009
*knocks on Author's window* update this? please?

hilarious. xD

-Jaeh
Hilaire chapter 2 . 2/15/2009
I was so lol at the title of this chapter. I mean, character development? In Dan Brown's books? It must be the joke of the century. Or something close to that. XD

'Despite the fact that Bobert was aging and had the salt-and-pepper, excuse me, sugar-and-chocolate, appeal, he was strong and carefree. This defies the fact that most old people are forgetful, get arthritis, or become weaker, because Bobert can’t leaparoundandsavetheworld—excuse me, work—while using a walker or while popping about fifty pills including but exclusively Viagra, Ambien, aspirin, and others…' - Haha! Totally made my day, lemme tell you. Good freakin' point. Haha. Excuse me while I continue to lol. XP

'Forget the fact that most scholars/professors get a paltry salary!' - Well, yes, thanks so much for noting that one. I know that the pay for being a teacher ain't too much, but Langdon in DVC and A&D was practically filthy rich. Cripes. So unrealistic.

'In fact, he is so good that people call him…

The Whale.'

Hahahahaha! All right, all right, I'm practically crying here due to laughter. *wipes her tears away* Hahaha! The Whale? WTH. So freakin' original! Haha! This - and you - are just so awesome. :D
Hilaire chapter 1 . 1/29/2009
Unlike you, I don't really like Dan Brown. He isn't my favorite author; he has never been. His books (particularly DVC) strike me as the typical 'omghypeybooksevah!1!1one!' type. All his four books contain heaps of inaccuracies one after another. So I don't really like him. Or The Da Vinci Code. Or anything else that he wrote. And it's not as if he wrote a lot.

But enough of that. I love how you managed to parody the typical Dan Brown writing: Very Prestigious Person (aka Ancient!Gary Stu) who knows some BIG secret is killed by Evil Fanatic and totallyawesomeLangdon/whoeverelsefromtheotherbooks enters to solve the crime and gets almost killed BUT! manages to crack the seemingly so complex!puzzle/mystery and totally saves the world! XD Seriously, Dan Brown's friggin' pattern is so painfully obvious that 'painfully obvious' doesn't even begin to cover it.

I loved how you inserted the thoughts of the unknown ‘Reader’ in here; made me lol for about several ages. I’m pretty sure that’s how typical authors want their readers to think. :D

Gah, the summons! I totally get the email thing you added there; I mean, there are lotsa hoaxes in the Internet about those sorts of stuff. Though the way Brown had the summons sent was quite predictable, anyway.

Overall, I love chapter. Very funny and witty at the same time. :)
T0M Serv0 chapter 2 . 3/15/2007
Chapter two was even funnier than the first, because damn, I can easily build my own character. Keep in mind you inspired me to write a South Park fiction where I bash on all slashfics because, if you care to look, that's all it ever is, poorly written slash and crap. Your style is wonderful, and you inspired me to take on this style to get my...awesome...revenge.

Please continue. I shall be waiting.

Snuffie
T0M Serv0 chapter 1 . 3/15/2007
I found out about you on and heh, I had to see what you had for 'The Da Vinci Code' and 'Angels and Demons'. Yes, I agree with your points, but the book satisfies for a nice, cheap thrill. Much like crappy movies who satisfy the audience with action, and that's it. I think your points on making these characters (and Robert Langdon) hillarious! I will read the next chapter, though keep in mind it's really good.

Snuffie
sweet-dreamrose chapter 2 . 2/12/2007
haha! *gasps* please update soon!
Sword Pen chapter 2 . 12/29/2006
Forty-one. :) LOL from Bobert's biggest fangirl.

"Chocolate and sugar!" m...

Update soon! PLEASE!
Sword Pen chapter 1 . 11/25/2006
Hey...

I actually like Bobert...

Looking forward to the rest! Update please! Even though I love these books, I can't deny that it's all true...
RiderGirl chapter 1 . 9/14/2006
lol, this is wonderful...
Stinger - VXR42 chapter 2 . 6/26/2006
Pfft...

ROFLMFAO!
Ozodrac chapter 2 . 6/23/2006
Excellent! It's all so true!
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