Reviews for Harry Potter and the Slytherin Prince
Anne Camp aka Obi-quiet chapter 1 . 4/5/2014
This chapter kept switching points of view, from first to third person and then from present tense to past tense. It was...distracting and not conducive to the story.

If you want examples, you said on the paragraph close to the bottom starting with 'thinking', the first paragraph is in third person past tense (wrote-past tense, he-third person) while the second is in first person past tense (mused-past tense, I - First person). Yet the whole story starts in third person present tense (although the first sentence, the 'was' towards the end should be 'is' or the first 'is' should be 'was', but the second paragraph down has "arms are aching" - present tense, Harry - third person). If those parts written in first person are his thoughts, you need to differentiate between them and the rest of the story, either putting them in single quotations and putting the actual spoken words in actual quotations, or by putting the thoughts in italics (those are both most common and would be easiest to understand).

Basically, pick one and stick with it and your story would be a lot more successful.

I am wondering where you're going with it though and I like your pacing.
mysinger chapter 43 . 2/22/2014
Amazing story! I love how you ended it, with Draco making the right choice and them saving each other. I'm glad Harry escaped, not only from Voldemort but also the Dursleys :) I love how you have portrayed Harry in this story. He is funny, smart, determined and kind-hearted. I'm not generally a fan of Harry/Hermione but they work together in your story. He gets her to lighten up! Well done! I look forward to the sequel.
Guest chapter 43 . 10/14/2013
I have thoroughly enjoyed your story. I think you have done a wonderful job evolving your characters from canon in a believable way, the plot was well thought out. My favourite individual line would be comparing Harry and snow...and the snow would go to Azkaban

Looking forward to the sequel!
Maddy Love Castiel chapter 43 . 8/8/2013
Seriously best Harry Potter story I've read! Everything you've written has been perfect and I wouldn't have changed a thing. The relationships, the feelings and even explaining all the wizarding spells has been so descriptive! Seriously magnificent!

Please please please consider writing or publishing the seventh year story! I'm was sad to see it wasn't published after the first one. Your story deserves thousands of reviews!

Thank you for sharing the fabulous story. Wicked brilliant! The Harry you've written is witty and sharp. He's not afraid to speak his mind. He does remind me of Snape. ;) Seriously love your Harry!


LuciMoon chapter 43 . 8/3/2013
Do u still plan to write and post the sequel? I really enjoyed this story and would love to read your ending!
yunike08 chapter 43 . 5/28/2013
Seriously, your story's amazing! I can hardly stop reading! Well, most of the time.

I love your Harry & the rest of the characters are simply amazing although I'm highly attracted to your Snape! They're all well made. I bow down to Your work.

Well, it's been years since this was posted. Even if you won't make a sequel I am satisfied with just this. But I'll be hoping and dreaming for some more interactions with Snape & Harry and finally see the day where Tommy Riddle (bleh! Hate him a lot!) dies or something miraculous happens (a bit doubtful, however).

I hope you're doing well with yourself and your life. Take care.
balantea chapter 43 . 5/26/2013
Hey, if you ever decide to continue this and make a sequel, could you post an AN update here to let us know? Thanks!
Iwa Shinju chapter 43 . 3/12/2013
I'm not sure whether you're still reading the reviews you get to this story, but not leaving one just because you might not seemed far to ungrateful, after I've spent so much time enjoying it.
I like the plot, for the simply reason that it's both convincing and interesting. You don't depict Harry as a weakling, but neither morph him into a superhero overnight.
The only complaints I have are purely technical and could probably be easily overcome by a good beta reader. Firstly, frequent typos, especially in names. Secondly, inconsistency as far as the tenses are concerned. Just in this chapter, for example: "Using some wandless magic, which was untraceable by the Ministry, Harry turns his walking stick into a normal wooden one with a curved handle, grows his hair out, turns it blonde, turns his eyes blue, ages himself and then pulls out a vial from his pocket and downs it quickly". Why 'was' and then 'turns' etc.? Either past or present. Lastly, Cho was most certainly and definitely a Ravenclaw NOT a Hufflepuff. Have a look at "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban", she's then a Seeker for Claws, while Cedric is one for Puffs.
Having it out of the way, I wanted to compliment you on all of your characters. I won't pretend I've liked all of them, but I do appreciate that they are all consistent. I hope you will someday find a time to write a sequel.
nintschibintschi chapter 42 . 2/23/2013
Great story thank you so much love to read more nintschi
Serpent de Lune chapter 3 . 1/4/2013
Super histoire, qui s'annonce prometteuse.
Larisya chapter 8 . 12/30/2012
I still don't think a schoolteacher can ban someone for life. For the rest of school, sure, but not after. Also, it was no Quiddich, not no flying so she had no grounds whatsoever to steal the brooms.
Aldryne21 chapter 1 . 11/2/2012
Perfectly brilliant story!
cfaithcsf chapter 1 . 10/28/2012
Quite a few background mistakes but interesting story all the same. Still wondering about the sequel though... its been years
Blacktipped Angelwings chapter 43 . 10/14/2012
Loved the story
Laurenmk20 chapter 20 . 10/13/2012
Blaise is NOT a female. Ugh!
420 | « Prev Page 1 .. 2 3 4 5 6 13 .. Last Next »