|Reviews for What You Get Is What You See|
| Muria chapter 4 . 3/22/2008
Very strange things... Good writing though! I love the very first paragraph of the first chapter, too!
| Ninjagirl27 chapter 4 . 2/29/2008
Like the story, but what the heck is going on? Must-read-more...
Gah! There isn't a next button! Losing- Air! No!
What did you think of the dramatic acting?
| Zombie Cordelia chapter 4 . 2/29/2008
One thing that really drew me out of this chapter was that you made some of the "old" people fifty. Fifty years old is NOT old. Usually fifty year olds are still working. I'd say make them in their mid to late sixties or their early seventies.
| Puldoh chapter 4 . 2/29/2008
oh, so far so good, keep it up, i'll be eagerly waiting for another update.
| KissMyAft chapter 3 . 12/11/2006
This chap is weird! Humans invading the Turtle's home for a week & they didn't know anything about it? Who are those mysterious humans & how are they able to slip by Leo, Don, Mikey, Raph, & Splinter?
ASAP please write and post chapter 4 so I and the other TMNT fans can find out what happens next to Leo, Don, Mikey, Raph, Splinter, April, & Casey
| KissMyAft chapter 2 . 12/11/2006
What's wrong with April? What kind of secret is it that she's hiding from Leo, Don, Mikey, Raph, & Casey? Does it have something to do with those missing children? I don't blame Don for being suspicious of her actions...I am too but whatever it is at least she is not the one responsible for kidnapping them...
| KissMyAft chapter 1 . 12/11/2006
This was a good chap & I felt so sorry for Leo when those boys called him a alligator/ As long as it is not a death fic or a romance fic with Leo involved, I'll keep on reading & reviewing
| Anonymous chapter 3 . 9/18/2006
This is really good! Where's chapter 4? Huh? Huh? Huh? I'm dying for more! Post it PLEASE!
| Reinbeauchaser chapter 3 . 6/23/2006
Hm.m.m.,.,love Lemon Pie, 'specially with merangue on top! Yummy.
Well, lemon scent - sounds like a room deordorizer. Where they live in the sewers, I think it would come in handy. That guy ought to come by more often, then, eh? LOL JK
Loved Mikey's comments about being comic relief! LOL So typical Mike! HA!
And Donnie sending April flowers. Sweet! Yellow was a good color, too, where it means friendship, ;remember me, I care, etc.,. It also means jealousy, but coming from Donnie, one can easly rule that out. :0) Yeah, yellow works. :0)
Anyway, another fine chapter. I didn't review as I read, so this one is shorter than my other comments.
In either case, looks like it's been a while since you last updated. Hope life is just busy and nothing to be concerned with.
| Anyuna chapter 3 . 4/6/2006
Divide and conquer. A great tactic. Tried and true.
Love, peace and chicken grease
| Reinbeauchaser chapter 2 . 4/3/2006
Great start to chapter two.
Um, where you have Casey recalling his visit with a convict (I assume the con was just a kid? I was sort of confused with that moniker - kid. Sounded as if Casey was also talking about the convict's son). Anyway, I think you unintentnionally left out the word 'name' in this sentence - - "He rememebered the guy's now, but he knew that the kid's mother had been..." In-between guy's and now, I think you meant to have the word 'name'?
In that same paragraph and towards the end of it, I think 'desire' should be past tense, 'desired'. You're already writing in past tense, so it goes to say you would past tense that word, too. :0)
Some coma placements were unnecessary. Whenever you use the word 'and', it bridges two thoughts, with some exception. There are always exceptions, it seems, in the literary word. :0)
Love Raph's comment about Leo having an episode! LOL I really chuckled over that.
Nice description of them racing across the rooftops! Very inventive! ;0)
Oh oh, what's going on behind April's shop?
Okay, where you have 'purple, yellow, and red spray paint cans hissing', when you add 'their arms went this way and that', it almost reads as if the cans had sprouted arms. LOL Oh, I've done this myself, misapplied action to an inanimate object like that. LOL Anyway, maybe - 'Purple, yellow, and red spray cans hissed as the kids' arms went this way and that in creating their 'art'.' or something like that. :0)
Liked how you descibed Raph sliding down the drain pipe, very visual. Where I have two grown kids, I remember how easy and graceful it was for them to slip and slide at the local park. That image came to mind. Of course, when I tried to do it - to be that hip parent - I looked horrifically silly! LOL
Yeah, love the stragegy thing. Nice thought there!
Hmm...blond is blonde. At least, here in the states that's the way it's spelled. UK often has different spellings for words, so, yeah, whatever works.
Raph's comment about Casey's vocabulary was funny. LOL
Um the girl got longer in the dim light? Maybe, 'taller' would be a better word? Shadows get longer, maybe that's what you meant to say? Not sure. Anyway...
Wow, talk about integrity. They only paint unoccupied buildings? It's still called graffiti, though. Interesting.
Loved Donnie's comment - wordsmith he is! LOL
Another word unintentionally left out. Where Casey is making the comment - "Like they wouldn't notice that this is shop" I think the word 'a' is missing? Your call on this one.
Um, April's doing a katana kata? Wow, she's come a long ways. :0)
I would think the guys would be more amused than worried, personally. I mean, it takes years of practice to even wield the sword with a reasonable amount of grace. But, it did add something funny to the scene. At least, for me it did.
I'm impressed with your understanding where the shop is relative to Manhattan. I went and checked and - based on Movie One - I compared that part to Seventh and Bleecker (In the Movie, Mike mentioned that intersection as to where they were in the sewers, when they were taking April back to her apartment, before Splinter was abducted). Yeah, I am only assuming, but April's shop would have to be somewhere between Central Park and the hub of New York City.
Donnie tripped. Bwahahahaha So much for ninja grace, eh? LOL
Um, golly, I seem to be nitpicking a lot, but I'm not. You used the word chose for choose. Minor glitch, but you might want to know about it, just the same.
Wow, this friend of April's sounds - suspicious. Not sure why, just does.
Interesting topic you interjected there - child abductions and pedophiling. Brave of you!
You're right on about child kidnappers and murderers (and other unsavory acts) and how prison inmates treat such fellows similarly incarcerated. Not well at all.
Abrupt ending, but a nice preview of Donnie's possible visit for the next evening.
All in all and despite my comments, a great little chapter! I see you've updated chapter number three, but I've spent way too much time at my PC today. I have groceries to shop for!
But I'll be back to read your most recent update!
| Zombie Cordelia chapter 3 . 4/3/2006
I know how motivating reviews can be :] I always try to review something, especially when that something is good. :] You have a great handle on writing, and it's refreshing to read.
Heh, I can't wait to see what happens when Mikey gets on Raph's nerves [cause he TOTALLY will] LOL.
| TheIncredibleDancingBetty chapter 3 . 4/3/2006
I'm seeing the hint of something very diabolical and intensly interesting! Tell me more, please! My tongue needs more of this flavor. Old people getting bapped, rich gangs paying for graffiti, and someone smelling like lemons going into the lair? It's just too sweet!
| BubblyShell22 chapter 3 . 4/3/2006
Cool chapter. I can see this happening on the show. You have the guys' characters down pat. Good for you! Update soon. You are doing a good job on this.
The Bubbly One,
| Sakura117us chapter 3 . 4/3/2006
Wow! I can't put my finger, to were you are going with this story. But I can tell you, You Have created A pretty darn Good story. Please keep going! later _