|Reviews for Castlevania Zero|
| Laryna6 chapter 2 . 5/22/2013
Yeah, this reads a lot nicer with the paragraphs cleaned up. I can't remember if there's any new content, but I do like the conversation with Lifesaver. A hive mind, huh, when I've generally thought of the virus as one, or that being part of the purpose. Not So Different at play here, although no sign either of them realizes this, either Lifesaver about himself or Zero about why Livesaver's nature seems wrong to him.
It would be wonderful to see everyone else's reactions to losing him in addition to X - none of the key players should be any more surprised that Lifesaver was, but even though they should be sad to see him go, for him to die when before he came back (just the way Sigma did) would be proof that it really was over. Perhaps justifying their mixed feelings about the deathwatch with 'he'll finally be able to join Iris,' etc.?
| Xajenn8 chapter 3 . 4/6/2012
I love this. Please make more! :D
| Laryna6 chapter 3 . 5/24/2011
It's really a shame that no one reviewed this before: I don't know if you'll get this, but here goes.
A technical problem is that you're supposed to start a new paragraph every time a different person speaks: you've got paragraphs where you switch from person A to B to A to B again, which makes for clunky paragraphs and difficulty telling who is speaking. Sadly, a lot of people will look at the first chapter of a fic, and if there's an obvious problem like that they'll hit the back button after being scarred by so many terrible fics. They'd be very wrong in this case.
Aside from that problem, though, your spelling and grammar and so on are pretty good, and the way you handle the characters is fantastic. Zero wanting to die, just everything. On top of that, the fusion with Castlevania seems like a really good idea, one that would feel surprisingly natural. Evils that keep being ressurrected, after all.
After so long (longer than a certain three-year break on one of my projects), you've probably lost inspiration, but if you were to fix the paragraph problem and perhaps move the fic to the crossover section, I think you'd that a lot more people would give it a chance, and I think they'd like it too.