|Reviews for A Time Before Twilight|
| Yin7 chapter 1 . 3/2/2009
really cool story
| Spartan-Guy 88 chapter 11 . 2/11/2009
Dude, I've read so many stories that are crossovers. But most of them are not full crossovers. Like if you have two or more universes that are just suddenly with each other; that ain't full crossover. If they take characters from different stories and put them in a toon version of a movie or game; that ain't full crossover.
But your story... this is full crossover.
LOL, I got that from Robert Downey Jr.'s monologue from Tropic Thunder.
Seriously though, I love this story so much. I've just gotten back into LBT;
And as for KH, I don't play that game, I'm a 360 player. But I do know the story to the game.
I seriously hope you continue this story.
| one chapter 2 . 1/8/2009
I've noticed some problems in many of the chapters.
First off, I've seen use different tenses throughout the story. You would be using past tense, and suddenly jump to present, and then back again. I'd stick with past, and be sure to keep it there.
Second of all, I've noticed that the dinosaurs are using several human words (like when the elder sharptooth hunter says they needed a "will of steel (not steal)." Be sure to go over the chapters to make sure you don't have the dinosaurs using words they shouldn't know about.
Other than that, the story is great, and I hope you update it soon.
Third, also remember to go back and look for spelling and grammar problems. Like in the example above, when the sharptooth said "will of steel" you put steal instead of steel. Fix problems like that and the story will read better.
| 0-0 chapter 11 . 1/4/2009
I hope you update soon, it looks (and so far does) like it has great potential, and so it would be a shame for it to come to a halt.
| reader chapter 11 . 12/14/2008
Like it, update soon.
And I also agree with what the other reviewer said. Sora's fought all types of creatures, both heartless and nobodies. So have Donald and Goofy. I find it strange how they all freaked out at the thought of the nobodies, and how Sora could only win by going into some kind of super drive. I also found it slightly weird how both Donald and Goofy seemed utterly incapable of defending themselves.
When the fights come, try to make them better at the fighting.
| JakeCrusher chapter 11 . 12/9/2008
I hope you finish
| JakeCrusher chapter 10 . 12/7/2008
I find hard to belive someone who has faced as much monsters as Sora has to be scared so easily. On another note all this "mate" buisness, I dont belive dinosaurs mate, the females lay eggs and males fertilize them. Hope you finish the story.
| JakeCrusher chapter 6 . 12/2/2008
100 miles per hour is slow for a car so it must be slothish for a spaceship. You have a real gift for portraying the characters, some writers mess up but you got them down pat.
| JakeCrusher chapter 4 . 12/1/2008
I hate to rain on your parade, but Organization XI already has a time contoler there no need for two.
| JakeCrusher chapter 3 . 11/30/2008
Your chapters are long and mentaly involving nice, although I suppose it wouldn't kill you to make your chapters a bit shorter.
| Guest chapter 11 . 11/29/2008
Oh man, you've got to update this soon. Kingdom Hearts mixed with LBT: for something I thought would never work, you've pulled off greatly. This story is excellent to read, and I hope you update very, very soon. Please?
| xThexJadedxBugx chapter 11 . 10/5/2008
Apparently, you've never seen me before...
BUT, as much as that is true, I'll have to say that you are the master of crossovers! I love how you show the story in it's most slightest detail, and the characters are never OOC. I bet it's hard making them withought messing up the current plot, or making a character OOC, but it looks like you're careful about not doing that.
Although the chapter are a little long I'll have to admit...but the point is, you really have an interesting crossover. Great plot, movie references from LBT (the last chapter's reference was from LBT 2 by the way), I hope you keep updating (although it doesn't look like you've updated in a while)
| Fan chapter 11 . 1/31/2008
Finally! It's great that this story continues. Please...finish it:)
| swack16 chapter 11 . 1/7/2008
Oh I know this refrence to this chapter. Its The Land Before Time II The Great Valley Adventure
| Neros Urameshi chapter 11 . 1/5/2008
What a great chapter!
Cream: I can't believe it! Heartless are in the Great Valley!
Lilo: I wish Sora and the gang would discover it!
Me: Anyway, I know that hill secret meeting reference. It's seen in Land Before Time 2.
All three: Please continue!