Reviews for Right
MomoPeachFlower chapter 1 . 8/21/2017
I have to say I was hoping it would be Edmund but as I read further I became sure it was Tumn7s, but then as it neared the end I wasn't so sure. Only to find out I was right the first time.
Beautifully portrayed, very well written.
Boom chapter 1 . 9/5/2013
Give people a little warning, will ya? Y'know, about incest?
The Madmadam chapter 1 . 6/25/2013
:D When I first read this, I had my hunch it was Edmund and am delighted to see I was correct. Now I find I keep craving this story and coming back to it, and fortunately it wasn't too difficult for me to find again. Poor Lucy... and poor Edmund, who has no idea.
schrockie chapter 1 . 1/3/2013
No offence, but I don't see how anyone could be in love with her brother. I love you writings style and they way you can kept a secret. I was so sure this was about Tumnus the entire time. After reading the last sentence, my jaw dropped.
songsmith chapter 1 . 10/8/2012
You have a fantastic way with words and I love the way you draw the reader along with you into this world and Lucy's musings. The surprise ending is nicely done - hinted at enough not to come from left field but still maintaining an element of shock. Great job!
Zellarest chapter 1 . 9/10/2012
I was convinced throughout the entire story that it was Tumnus, surely. I let out a breath of surprise when it was revealed to be none other than Edmund. I don't judge you, no no not at all, I was just surprised. I thought that by the hints of words like "Narnian" and "beard" that it was Tumnus. But, no. I was oddly delighted it was Edmund, somewhy. Tumnus seemed, evidently, too predictable. And that is what made it shockingly amazing!
Wonderful execution, though! I was truly surprised. That's what every story needs. It needs to tickle the reader's curiosity, until the urge to just read the last few sentences becomes too much. Until they stick it and read that much faster, wracking their brains to figure out who it is. If the end result surprises them, then it was a job done well!
Just fantastic! The forbidden desires, never to be executed or done lest there be consequences are the ones that are the most interesting! When you're told or know you're not to do something, you just want to do it that much more, but you know it's wrong.
Fan-tas-tic! Definitely one of my favorite stories now. Wonderful wonderful wonderful. I just can't express how much I loved it! It is indescribable!
I must tell you, once again, how fantastic of a writer you are. If you don't know it, then I'm telling you now. No matter what anyone says, this was wonderful and hope that you go far. Farther than fanfiction. Because you deserve so much more!
May your days be ever fruitful!
rthstewart chapter 1 . 9/5/2012
Oh Lucy. You poor, confused girl. You poor, poor confused girl. You draw her longing so beautifully. She knows she can't have this, she knows it's wrong and she so conflicted. Edmund is wonderfully drawn here, observing the boundaries and probably not even knowing what Lucy feels and it just makes it worse for her because he doesn't see it. It's irrational and terrible and she knows these things but she can't stop what she feels and cannot have. Wonderfully done. And I guess some of your reviewers didn't read this very carefully. A beautiful, sad, sad story.
Metonomia chapter 1 . 9/5/2012
This is really lovely! I think it works especially well because of the grounding in specific observable details - the burnt edges of scones or toast, Lucy on board's a lovely, bittersweet piece.
MCH chapter 1 . 8/18/2012
Like everyone I thought it was Tumnus but know it was Edmund. It was very well written and it was a shock at the end to realise whoit was. It sounds to me he doesn't know which if that is so then I'm happy about that.

So well written but not the subject. But that my personal view.
Guest chapter 1 . 5/15/2012
From the point of writing quality, this is very well written and if it had been about Lucy's feelings about a Narnian friend, I would even have given the very rare accolade of calling it just about perfect.

However, the fact that this is about incest just destroys the story. Given the time, place and standards of the background of the Pevensie children, it is also totally unbelievable. The story says that because she's Queen, this relationship is forbidden. NO, it's because they're siblings that it's forbidden. And the fact that some of the reviewers are so approving/accepting of this is even more sad and troubling. It makes one wonder what their own personal behaviour is like.

C.S. Lewis would be utterly horrified that people are using his beautiful stories about characters who strive for noble ideals as vehicles for such unethical and, yes-sadly, I must say it-disgusting stories. It's particularly sad for me as I had just discovered your stories and had just read and loved "Between Worlds", only to be so disappointed by this.
mudpuddledemon chapter 1 . 11/16/2011
I love/hate the mystery, but more love I think, since the last line set off fireworks. The bits about the ships were so alluring. 3
Jane-Liebling chapter 1 . 12/8/2008
Oh my gosh. So I fell in love with this story like a year ago, but being smart, I forgot the name. I went through like the entire CoN section looking for it! Stalker much, I know right? haha sorry :) anyways, I am really not a fan of incest, but this- this was just amazing! I loved the way you wrote it! I've never seen Lucy portrayed quite this way before. It worked brilliantly! Writing more would be awesome!

Jane L

p.s. Oh I love Edmund so much! You wrote him so dang well!
DCMotta chapter 1 . 6/23/2008
The WHOLE time i read this, i tthough it was tumnus. And then when she said Edmund's name, my eyes went wide as saucers. i'm like, "What..." but in a good way. You didn't give us a hint on who the boy/man was, so you kept the element of surprise pretty up there. Also, i don't mean to tick any other NArnia fans but having read a Peter/Lucy (though that i didn't like) fanfic before i thought it was him but then tumnus and i completely forgot about Edmund. In the end, i slapped my head because i forgot about nhim. It was mouth-dropingly good. Keep Writing!
sta2l1ght chapter 1 . 6/21/2008
It was super good! please continue
thenandnow chapter 1 . 5/20/2008
That was beautifully written. It gave ME shivers. :]
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