|Reviews for Teacher and Student|
| Crazygirl666 chapter 1 . 5/26/2014
this was ...ok...er...alright...no...just no...nononononono...why would you do this?!
| nobaru rei chapter 1 . 1/6/2014
Nooooooo hakuuuuu :(
Damn you universe and your age policies!
| CharlieBoneFan chapter 1 . 9/25/2013
NOOOOOOO! HAKU COME BACK! Chihiro is probably heart broken. Even if it did have a sad ending, it was still a really good story.
| Raksha Souza chapter 1 . 4/2/2012
| LovesDepp chapter 1 . 12/1/2011
| Snap on Smile chapter 1 . 5/15/2011
im really sorry but 14? thats to young, Haku would be a peadophile and thats just wrong.
also a 14 year old being such a slut is a bit much. i know it happens i just think you should have made her older, i honestly dont thik a 14 year old could fall in love.
| The Voices Talk to Me chapter 1 . 9/16/2010
Cute, spicy, and bad, all in one.
| Fairychick159 chapter 1 . 6/10/2010
they took him away?what did she do did he get out,were they able to love each other?
| winter051094 chapter 1 . 4/11/2010
y is this rated M? it should b "T" but other than dat, i really really liked. good job on this story. :)
| tenten93 chapter 1 . 6/4/2008
that was so good! well done!
| WriterforLife29 chapter 1 . 2/20/2008
THIS is complete?
Aw no you better write a sequel or somethin'!
| strawberries and napkins chapter 1 . 8/26/2007
It wasn't corny, rather a little bit realistic...
I mean, the idea could've worked but the way it was executed was a little off making the story seem rushed.
Chihiro was like a nice slut which was...odd and Haku wasn't the sophisticated being I would expect him to be. I mean, he's an adult and he sure didn't act that way.
I think it would've been so much more believable if Chihiro was a little more innocent and shy, feeling this weird attraction to Haku that she can't seem to stamp out and then have her need help on a project, have her go in after school, they get to know each other which leads to a somewhat accidental kiss. Or something along those lines. I mean, it would be a little more difficult to make into an one-shot but it would be possible.
And the way it transitioned from them having sex to one month later and them being madly in love just seemed like a chunk was missing out of the fanfic. What happened between them? When was the moment that both realized that it was more than lust? I mean, I think that if you put that in it really would've made this story.
"They went to the bedroom, and for the next two hours, pent-up passion was released, and they were together."
This line irked me. It sounded like a something out of a bad porno. There's a way of being artsy and non-graphic and then the way of being "I'm-a-ten-year-old-girl-who-has-never-done-anything-like-this-before" And it can happen to anyone no matter what their age or experiences are. Even in the car it seemed like that.
On the other hand, you write really well. Your grammar was right on-point which is enjoyable to see on this site as it is rare and the description was neither overdone or lacking.
But I suppose I shall be going now so I hope you've found some things I've mentioned helpful.
| Scissorkid999 chapter 1 . 8/24/2007
I Just Finished Reading Your Composition "Teacher and Student, A Spirited Away fanfic" And Would First Like To Thank You For Posting Your Work To Be Reviewed. You Chose To Include Aspects Of Spirited Away And Also Touch On The Controversial Subject Of Illegal Dating, A Strange Combination. Miyazaki's Spirited Away Is As Well As All His Works Themed Around Nature And Conservation Though I Believe This Was Sparcely Discussed In Your Work Aside From A Conflict Between Law And Human Nature. As Far As Your Story Goes It Is Decent With Only A Few Factual Errors, One Being Mr Rivers Pondering Of "How Did They Know?" When It Had Already Been Established That The Entire School Had Known About Their Relationship. If The Story Was Intended To Dwell On Their Relationship I Believe You Did Not Establish Enough Contact Between Them. In All, You Chose Great Lyrics To Base Your Story, And I Urge You To Continue Writing.
| lindseyluvshaji chapter 1 . 7/11/2007
oh how sad thay can't be togther but 14 dame that young 22 dame that 1 hell 14 and 22 dating
| deadlykitty chapter 1 . 7/6/2007
aww, poor Haku... he didn't even start the game yet he's the one punished! good story.