|Reviews for Black Fears|
| Arisyne chapter 1 . 8/31/2009
Please please please post more. i like your story a lot. Id love to know how it all turns out.
| Lamby chapter 4 . 5/2/2007
"Any luck in the book?" Tee hee, he's a poet and he didn't know it. Well, almost. Lamby
| Lamby chapter 3 . 5/2/2007
Ok, seems my li'l sis has got a bit of undeserved criticism over this story and the amount of OCs in it. Frankly I don't think you can ever have too many OCs, but there you go. Secondly, only Crystal is actually's Rasa's, the other characters are all on lone from other FF authors. Blaze, Shockwave & Iona are mine, Ilehana Xavier is Corrinth's. They are long-standing characters now- Corrinth and I have been writing fanfics for years, so to use them and remain loyal to who they are is not easy for Rasa. In fact its probably harder to write someone else's OCs than it is to write the X-Men from the films, trust me, I know. Yet she has done this exceedingly well, and I am proud of her. Keep it up Rasa! Lamby
| Lamby chapter 2 . 5/2/2007
Hehehe, I love charmed, its so mindlessly entertaining. Lamby
| LoganLuver101 chapter 4 . 4/26/2007
This is an awesome fanfic and i can't wait for the next chapter!
| Aria DeLoncray chapter 2 . 8/29/2006
Hmm, interesting. Do I have to read the story before this one to understand? I only recognized Storm and Logan from the last chapter. Update soon.
| SilverLight05 chapter 2 . 7/9/2006
Please update soon! I’m interested in where you are going to take this story!
| Susan chapter 2 . 6/27/2006
I love the first two chapters. I am curious about the premonition and what happens when the Charmed Ones and xmen meet so please update soon.
| Snickle-Gigger chapter 2 . 6/7/2006
Hmm...I know nothing about Charmed, so this chapter made zero sense to me whatsoever. o.0 However, I must say that I like the characterization that you've put into these girls. Even if I've never watched the show, I can tell that that can all be sassy in their own little ways just from what you've written. . I may have to do a little research on the show or something, so I can understand it better...
My word of advice here is to put more characterization into the OCs you use. You may know them very well since you're the one writing them, but for the people reading they don't know them so well. Some more physical descriptions and such would be nice.
| Snickle-Gigger chapter 1 . 6/7/2006
Well, first off I have to say that WhYiStHeRuMgOnE has a lot of good points in her review. Whenever she reviews and it isn't a flame (or sometimes even if it is) you should listen to her. I have to agree with the most of what she said. Also, like her, I know absolutely nothing about Charmed, mainly because I don't want to. Like Rummy (nickname; not hard to guess how it was derived) I always thought the Charmed bunch to be horribly cliched, and so never spared the time to watch the show.
However, it's nice to recognize some of the characters from other stories as well. . Also, I've noticed that with each chapter of each story you have up, your writing style is steadily improving.
Though I don't think much of Logan calling the girls 'girlies'. He has been known to go as far as to refer to those that he cares about, like Rogue or whoever, as "darlin'" or even "gal", but never "girlie".
Still, you have intrigued me, and since I see there is more to read, I shall do so. Jinxeh, aawwaayy!
Yeah, that was lame...
| I've-Got-a-Jar-of-Dirt chapter 1 . 5/5/2006
All right then.
Kinda Mary-Sued. Honestly...what the heck kind of a name is 'Ilehena', anyways? Is Xavier her dad? What, was he going through some sort of a hippy phase or something when she was born? Really, giving your OC a name that's OMG SO EXOTIC! is a big Mary-Sue strike, and isn't going to make people like the character any more. In fact, it will make people HATE your character even more.
Sorry if I sound like some bitchy flamer...which in reality I am, but this isn't a flame. Normally when I flame, I just curse the author's stupdity and tell them to either die or write something that doesn't suck. I won't be doing that to you because I see potential for you here, and think that with time you could become a pretty good writer. That, and I know that you're one of Jinxeh's loyal reviewers (I read her stories like crazy, plus know her in real life) and I don't like to flame people that she knows. It causes too much drama.
I don't think I'll be reading any more of this story, though. I absolutely hate Charmed. Three beautiful, OMG so trendy and TRAGIK girls with supernatural powers...yeah, that's cliched to me.
Now, my suggestion for the future would be to add a little more detail into it. Now, even though I absolutely despise Charmed, I have seen an episode or two (against my will) and know that most of the OC characters you've introduced are most likely from your first story. (Haven't read it yet, might later) The thing is...you gave absolutely NO good descriptions of them, besides their names. I don't know who the hell these girls are, what they look like, if they're in relationships with others or each other, what exactly their powers are, how long they've been at Xavier's, how long they've known another, what their stories are-come on, you've got to give us some detail here.
A word of advice: in sequels, write everything out as though the people that are reading the sequel itself have never set eyes on the story that came before that. You can't just introduce the girl's by name; you have to give descriptions about them, so we know what's going on.
Also, the fire drill thing...kind of random. Something like that should probably be resolved in the first chapter. This chapter was also really on the short side.
Please don't take offense at this. This is just some helpful criticism, not a flame.
| Lamby chapter 1 . 4/25/2006
Hey dude! You're back! Wow, this review thing has developed a spel checor, where is the fun in dat? LOL! Made for knight of avlee, you think? Anyway, glad you're back. This is very promising, keep up the good work. Later, Lamby