|Reviews for Deathly Accurate|
| Neophyte Ronin chapter 1 . 11/13/2006
Now the concept is fascinating and the intro is slick, but I have to be honest with you, there are a couple of glaring setbacks.
For one, describing Quistis' regular status as Headmistress of G-Garden could have been transmitted in a more interactive fashion, rather than a blunt explanation. She could be gathering gear and walking out the door, or explaining over the phone about her situation to Ellone (this taking place after she has the exceptionally stiff meeting with Commander Leonhart), Anything but a blunt lecture on the details!
And two, well, that might pertain to the length of each paragraph. Maximize the side of the screen and adjust the font size, and you still have trouble wading through paragraphs seven lines thick. Trying to fight against wordiness, which can shroud our understanding, is pretty difficult to do, but it goes a long way to help the reader. Anything that helps the reader is worth pursuing.
Other than those, there are no problems with the first chapter. Interesting concept to bring FFVI into the realm of paranormal and psychic crime detectives. And it certainly makes excellent use of the really overlooked lady, too.
| A Slayer chapter 2 . 6/6/2006
wow I like it so far and Squall seems like a really big jerk lol _ so what kind of triangle is this gunna be? and yeah Quistis roxs wotness lol cant wait for more
| oOwoooot lol chapter 1 . 5/16/2006
i like, I wanna read more _ I'll be watchin you lol _
| DillyShilly chapter 2 . 5/13/2006
Hello, nice second chapter. I loved it, great desciption, till next time, laterdays.
| DillyShilly chapter 1 . 5/5/2006
Hello, in case your wondering it's chocobo-nunchaku, once again i changed my name, I dont stick with the same one for long, I loved the story and will be looking forward to updates, and thank you for adding me as one of the people you dedicated it for, bye.