Reviews for Forlorn
isthisparadise chapter 2 . 5/7/2006
I love the update and the way you had this chapter please update again soon I want to see how you make this turn out.
Knight who says ni chapter 1 . 5/3/2006
Nice job. I like it. When you do naruto try to make the villedgers hate him more and have him beaten so it seems real. Great story.
Meinos Kaen chapter 1 . 5/2/2006
Very interesting. Nice introduction of Haku. Then it's Gaara's turn, and then Naruto, finally. Keep writing.
Shadowhound-89 chapter 1 . 5/1/2006
Interesting story. I like the way you describe things, the beginning was especially good with the fath and the knife.

"Haku stared with wide gray eyes as his father lunged for him, with a long carving knife" there doesn't need to be a comma in between 'him' and 'with.'

Again, good story. I hope to see how Naruto and Gaara fit into this. Hope to see more soon.

Shadowhound
Kalrak chapter 1 . 5/1/2006
The title is 'Forlorn'. This is a cool fic, but needs minor tweaks. Keep writing!
isthisparadise chapter 1 . 5/1/2006
I love this story and cannot wait until you introduce the other characters please update soon.
Yami-chan chapter 1 . 5/1/2006
Awesome beginning! Please update son!
832 | « Prev Page 1 .. 46 53 54 55 56