|Reviews for The Trouble With Flu|
| Ningen Demonai chapter 1 . 5/18/2007
Aw That's wonderfully adorable and I loved the interaction between Millie and Christopher!
(Heheh, serves the god right XD)
| Koru-chan chapter 1 . 3/25/2007
Aw, that was great! Just the right amount of humour and just the right amount of fluff! Kudos!
| Aqua Mage chapter 1 . 2/26/2007
Fantastic! Liked that Millie still calls him Christopher...
| dreaminghour chapter 1 . 10/4/2006
*cracks up* This is lovely. I think this is a wonderful inbetween sort of story, and that you've captured the characters very well. I comend you on writing such an intresting story. I love it.
| Dreaming-Cat-369 chapter 1 . 9/10/2006
whoa, great story! 9/10!
| older and amused chapter 1 . 8/11/2006
i LOVED it! especially the ending! hehe! Great Zond with a tissue! GREAT ZOND WITH A SWEAR WORD! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
very cute too. i love Chris/Millie!
| hull lull lull chapter 1 . 7/30/2006
| Bye. See ya. Or not chapter 1 . 7/9/2006
lol this was so funny... Christopher and Millie are so cute :D
bb xx much appresiated
| PuffofLogic chapter 1 . 6/20/2006
I thought it was great. I love Chrisopher as Chrestomanci and it was nice to see him in a regular setting with Millie. I also enjoy the last bit with Great Zond. It made me laugh. Overall, fantastic. Thanks for writting it.
| alyce chapter 1 . 5/25/2006
I think this is absolutely gorgeous. Your interpretation of Millie and Christopher is spectacular. Keep writing more about them.
| Blue Yeti chapter 1 . 5/24/2006
Oh, I really adored that. It was such a beautiful little slice. The comfortable *marriedness* of Christopher and Millie, while still maintaining a few of the old jokes from the LoCC/CF days. Millie wanting to sleep in the playroom for her own peace of mind. Christopher being too damn lazy/sick to walk up the stairs without some sort of motivation. Christopher being oh-so-slightly peeved at the entire situation of summoning and fixing problems which are never too much, but never quite easy. *pets the pretty mundanity of it all*
A few things to think about in future stories, both of them relating to length and ease of writing. Both your sentences and paragraphs can get clumbersome and long. Run on sentences, with multiple clauses, can be extremely hard to read if they are part of very long paragraphs which touch on multiple topics; breaking the sentences up into smaller, bite-sized peices will improve the ease of reading, and make it so tyhat the little interludes are engaging rather than distracting and annoying. None of it is actually *wrong*, but it's not easy to read in a lazy manner. I constantly found myself sliding back up to the start of individual sentences and paragraphs to remember what the original concept was.
The same with the paragraphing - you could have more of it. There were a number of instances were you could have broken a paragraph into two or three, such as the extremely long paragraph that started on Millie scolding him, touched on his relationship with Gabriel and canon history, and then returned to his teenage relationship with Millie. Generally I don't start any 'concept' paragraphs with dialogue, I separate the dialogue from a following explanation, even if the explanation is directly related to the dialogue before.
Hm... Another point would be the amount of exposition, but it was a short peice and the only exposition you had related to the past. Generally show, don't tell, but in this context the telling added to our understanding of what was shown.
But, overall, I loved it. Great characterisation of them both, and I really enjoyed reading this. *pets Ch/M as my lone fluff ship from which I appreciate mundane snippets-of-life*
I hope you've got more fic/to see more from you in Chrestomanci. To that end, I'm author alerting.
Thanks for a great fic.
| Nyeren chapter 1 . 5/15/2006
I really enjoyed this tale; there really aren't enough Chrestomanci fics, particularly concering himself & Millie. The end was quite wonderful as well.
| lunartick chapter 1 . 5/14/2006
Lol! That was cute! A little wordy but cute!