|Reviews for Taking Control|
| zekses chapter 1 . 10/5/2014
While I do find it somewhat interesting, there is just too much fawning over Ginny gor me to read without skipping huge chunks of text. A good story overall, but, I am afraid, not exactly for boys :)
| fellow chapter 28 . 9/25/2014
| Skuld Odinsdottir chapter 28 . 9/21/2014
I knew there was a reason I didn't favorite this...
It is marked complete even though it ends on a cliffhanger... and the sequel isn't complete.
| Starlight chapter 16 . 9/20/2014
Sorry, You are taking too long to get there:/ I can't read 12 more chapters when You have taken 16 chapters and still haven't haven't reached the climax!
| Starlight chapter 15 . 9/19/2014
DID YOU HAVE TO DO THAT?! Shit, only if u lived nearby:/
| Starlight chapter 11 . 9/18/2014
Oh my God ... That chapter was ... I haven't gotten a word to describe it, it touched the next level ...
| phoebuscat chapter 28 . 9/17/2014
Hermione and 'Bumblesbore' need to be stomped into the ground, never to be heard from again! What idiots...
This is so much fun, but a shame that you left the sequel unfinished!
| Starlight chapter 8 . 9/17/2014
Yay! A great chappy! Trust me when I say this that I love that you write so long chapters and it is kinda the longest fic I've read, it kind of matches the level of Rowling ... That is a lot to say ...
| Starlight chapter 1 . 9/17/2014
Just wanted to say, never doubt yourself cuz ur fanfictions are soo good that u don't realize it:) Keep on like that, love ur canon pairings, had it been H/Hr, I wouldn't have like to read the first chapter. Cuz Harry and Hermione don't just fit ...
| Lioness1988 chapter 5 . 9/16/2014
I believe your epic work would benefit from editing to cut down on the excessive descriptive phrases and minutiae. For example, instead of using massive passages of narrative to describe Ginny's contradictory analysis of Harry in Chapter 5, you could accomplish the same thing with a limited number of thoughts and a simple statement saying she was confused. You might also consider using more dialogue to reveal information about the characters and their relationships. Some of the phrases you use have awkward constructions. The words don't really go together.
Your description of Jessica is not realistic. British shop assistants are not that helpful. I doubt a 16 or even an 18 year old would be employed at a department store in central London near Diagon Alley, and I doubt she'd be able to afford shared accommodation nearby.
Regarding the meal that Jessica and Harry share, tipping is not standard, nor is it usually 15%. Harry's main course is American, not Italian or British. And the waiter in an Italian restaurant in Britain probably would never wish any diner bon appetit.
You obviously put a lot of work into the story, but I cannot continue reading it beyond Chapter 5 because it is too verbose, and it appears from recent reviews that the story isn't actually complete.
| Guest chapter 28 . 9/9/2014
This was a really awesome story. The character development of Harry, Ginny and Professor McGonagall was intense and incredibly written. As a written piece of work, this was simply amazing. A personal qualm of mine is Hermione. I feel like I can understand where you're coming from with many of the decisions that she makes, but at the same time, by her sixth year, she's placed a lot less trust in authority and has repeatedly supported Harry, even when no one else, including Ron, did. But, that's just me and my belief of Hermione is like. Overall though, I extremely enjoyed reading this and I hope you update the sequel, though it has been several years now.
| kitty chapter 28 . 9/1/2014
Very misleading saying it was completed. It definately was not complete. The sequel only has 6 chapters and hasnt been updated in over 3 years. I assume its abandoned. A shame. Was a good story.
| LordMerlinEmrys chapter 4 . 8/18/2014
Just a small thing - I think you forgot something when Jessica says the standard tip. Did you mean 15%?
| wolfbloods unite chapter 28 . 8/17/2014
Is there a sequel to this?
| billbrink chapter 28 . 8/7/2014
I can't believe you labeled this excellent story complete. Before someone spends a week reading this novel length work they should be informed a sequel is in progress.