Reviews for Dragon's Duty
Anonymous chapter 9 . 3/20/2012
Excellent story here. While the idea of following a weyrling class through to graduation probably isn't all that original for a Pern fanfic, this is exceptionally well executed. I love your attention to detail, like Mariko still holding onto her bread as she joins her new wing. The dialogue throughout was excellent, and while there were no huge surprises, there were no massive disappointments, either.

Mayath is adorable. She has an honest to goodness personality, something that's not always the case with dragons in the actual novels.

My only real qualm is that Elias disappears very quickly following Hatching. The irony of Carima, the one who'd given up on her dream to focus on honing other talents, ending up a greenrider while Elias, who had wanted a dragon all her life, presumably never Impresses, is just too great for you not to have explored it. These two characters have known each other all their lives. Some words should have passed between them, and indeed, I would've thought that Carima coping with emotional Elias' jealousy should've been one of the main storylines. Elias is like J'trel in Dragonsblood, an interesting character who deserves more pages than the author allots.

Overall, however, this is great. I really felt like I was on Pern. In that you kept the story's focus squarely on Carima instead of shoving in a whole bunch of other storylines that don't need to be there, I can honestly say that I believe this is a better Pern novel than 1989's Renegades of Pern. Regardless of your opinion on that particular book in the series (It's not that bad.), please take that as the high compliment it is meant to be.

I hope that you've had nothing but happiness in the years since you've finished this, and that like Carima and Mayath you've graduated to writing original works. Thanks for sharing your vision of Pern with the world. If you ever choose to revisit this feisty green and her rider, I will be very happy.
Anonymous chapter 7 . 3/19/2012
I've really enjoyed these past two chapters. I really didn't expect K'say's reaction. His behavior's ugly here, but it rounds him out, makes him more than just Mr. Perfect. I like how you've stayed true to the dangerous, flawed world of Pern instead of idealizing everything. Well done.
Anonymous chapter 5 . 3/19/2012
Another great chapter. The way you address the sheer idiocy that is the tying of rank to dragon biology is quite nice. Carima's organizational skills should make her proud, and I'm glad that you don't simply bury the importance of the weyrfolk beneath the glamour of dragonriding. If Carima's got what it takes to be headwoman, I imagine she has what it takes to be Weyrwoman as well. She's got more leadership skills than Tullea and D'gan. That's for darn sure! The twins' support of her was a nice surprise. It really shows just how much progress she's made socially.

You've either done your homework gleaning from the novels or really sat down and used your imagination because the detail you put into the flying lessons is terrific. I can see everything is my mind so very well.

This is a great story with really likable characters that stand out as individuals. Well done so far.
Anonymous chapter 4 . 3/19/2012
Again, another great chapter. I should mention that I've been reading right along and have enjoyed the odd chapters as well. I imagine that your writing has evolved much over the past six years, so my comments may very well be unnecessary, but I thought I'd repay you for the pleasure, anyway.

The only thing that irks me about this chapter is that you've picked up the McCaffreys' irritating habit of waiting several chapters before describing the protagonist's appearance. Up until this chapter, I'd envisioned Carima as a straight-haired brunette. Perhaps it's just a pet peeve of mine not shared by many, but as soon as I meet a major character, I imagine a body for that character. If nobody tells me what the character looks like, I'll create a body and stay with it, hence why in my head Lessa with always have platinum blonde hair even though she's canonically brunette and your Carima still has straight hair, albeit straight red hair. My point is that receiving new information like that can distract readers from noticing more important details. This is nowhere near as bad as Anne McCaffrey waiting around two hundred pages to describe the healer in Moreta, but it's still annoying. You do a terrific job of describing Mariko right when we first meet her. Please do that from now on.

I'd also like to take time to praise you for taking the extra time to describe your dragons. I really like Cirinth's unique tail. In many of the actual novels, you never learn about the dragons' distinguishing features. It leads one to see them as all looking pretty interchangeable, like chipmunks, and that leads one to see dragons as being somewhat interchangeable in general. You also put a lot of time into creating unique personalities for Mayath and Caleyth, something you don't always see in the actual books. Thank you.

The story so far is pretty great. I have no issues with it.

Here's hoping you're still happily typing away. Even if you've grown bored with writing, I hope you're happy.
Anonymous chapter 2 . 3/19/2012
This is beautiful. Your use of sensory details like the heat of the sand and the stripes on Cayleth's wings really transported me to Telgar Weyr. You also nicely capture that harshness so typical of Pern, a world where duty is everything and failure is not an option. The dialogue toward the end shines as well. I haven't read all the Pern books, but in the ones I have read, we often don't hear from the dragons much, so I like how you have them speak here. Mayleth trying to crawl back into her egg is just precious. The spelling of the headwoman's name changes inexplicably midway through, but that's the only real problem. Well done! I hope you are still writing. You really have a talent for it.
wendums chapter 9 . 11/23/2011
Very entertaining fic. I was totally immersed in it. Thanks
Shadowfox13 chapter 9 . 10/30/2011
Aww, that was cute! I'd love to know does she eventually wind up with K'say? They'd make a wonderful pairing ;) If you still do fanfic for Pern, I hope to and look forward to reading more.
Musing Feather chapter 9 . 5/2/2011
I didn't find the ending sappy at all. Though the evil character torturing side of me wanted to see Mayath rise and have Cirinth catch her then the two could have their little awkward angsty conversation after the flight. :P

Reading the /between/ class chapter was absolutely heart wrenching. Though I wasn't very attached to P'lack or P'larn for that matter, I find it very rare that people actually write about that class and the loss of the weyrlings. Just knowing that four of the class were lost was touching.

I'm not sure if you intended it that way, but I found that there were a few different males in the story who at different times all seemed likely to be the one to pair up with Carima and Mayath, and I liked that. It was good to see that there was different potential partners she could end up with, not just a constant man that you could tell was going to end up her partner. Was kinda refreshing.

Well done! Wanted more though :P
DramoSkye chapter 9 . 5/19/2010
That was wonderful. I have no idea what you should work on next, but I loved the work you did on this story.
artri chapter 9 . 10/18/2009
Very enjoyable read. Delighted to find some new Pern writings My ever fav world.
terzap chapter 9 . 4/1/2009
Thank you for sharing your amazing talent-Ms McCaffrey herself would have approved with delight. Normally I find myself editing and getting frustrated as I read fanfics-but you are one of those rare writers who not only can write very well, but can instantly suck a reader in and make him or her forget they are reading at all.

I didn't think the ending was sappy-it was too short and sweet for that. :) I am left satisfied.
stephinola36 chapter 9 . 2/3/2009
Loved your story - can't believe that anyone would ever refuse the chance to Impress so you hooked me early!

Yes, the end was a little sticky sweet - but we all need some sweetness in our lives.

Thank you for your story!
Fremma chapter 6 . 10/7/2008
I know it happened with Marco and Duluth, and they're a special case really, but I didn't think there was anything about Weyrlings getting lost between in quite these sorts of numbers. I would have thought it was really very unusual to lose a Weyrling this way.
GinnyStar chapter 9 . 7/3/2008
I hope you write more about your female green rider and her expernces during the Pass. Great Story.
GinnyStar chapter 8 . 7/3/2008
Well, what a way to enter a Pass. Nice action. Along with how the fighting wings fight. The Wyerling transport and toss the bags of firestone. I thougt that they just let go of the spend ones, I guess that its too windy to do that. Good Story :)
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