Reviews for The End Of Innocence
Animekitty47 chapter 5 . 8/29/2008
That was a great lil fanfic! You did the previous chappies really well, I was nearly in tears. *sniffle* The last chappie was great! I like how made a happy ending! XD
chuckchuck001 chapter 5 . 8/26/2006
I like the story, and the end leaves room for more. I did have a problem with the quotes. I'm used to seeing quotes continue in one paragraph until a different person starts speaking. Otherwise it gets confusing as the reader tries to determine who is speaking. When Angelina and Erik are just meeting and she begins:

“Please...” She whimpered, wrapping her scrawny arms around the brown rags she wore.

“Don't touch me... Please.”

“Child, I don't wish to hurt you.” I said calmly, although it didn't ease her tension.

...to me it reads like she starts, then he says 'Don't touch me' and she calls him 'Child'. At that point I understand, but I think it would read more easily like this:

“Please...” She whimpered, wrapping her scrawny arms around the brown rags she wore. “Don't touch me... Please.”

“Child, I don't wish to hurt you.” I said calmly, although it didn't ease her tension.

...Hope you don't mind a little constructive criticism!
MJ MOD chapter 5 . 6/14/2006
Is Erik dead? No!
Little Lotte chapter 5 . 6/13/2006
And now Erik's watching you as an angel because he loves you. Thats such a sad ending. And yes, you did add in fluff. But what is an Erik story without fluff? But I loved the ending. Your very careful not to put E/C romances in your stories...Even just a bit. But I like it; its your style. I'm so proud of you.

I love you.

~Lotte
nullandvoid000000001212310000 chapter 4 . 6/13/2006
I love you Jammes...You are everthing. I'm so proud of you...for all of this. If only there was a finality like Angel's, only one for you not quite so drastic. Your amazing. Your everything. I don't know who I would be without you. I'm so proud of you.

~Little Lotte
Phantomess785 chapter 4 . 6/12/2006
Aw, that sucks that she has to die like that. But I guess I understand. Very very well written. I love it!
MJ MOD chapter 4 . 6/12/2006
Oh, it's so sad and horrible. Angela killed herself. I hope Erik won't be to injured by her action.
MJ MOD chapter 3 . 6/7/2006
Angelina wants to kill Michael? She should. Well, I understand her feelings but killing someone leaves traces on one's soul. I'm not sure it's a good thing for her. Erik is used to it, too much used, even. Hmm, difficult choice there. Should Michael be killed? He sure deserve it. Still, should Erik or Angelina darkens their soul for this creep? Argghh! Decisions!
MJ MOD chapter 2 . 6/6/2006
Michael raped Angelina? If she runs away he'll tell lies to her parents.
Little Lotte chapter 2 . 6/5/2006
Oh, Jammes...I'm so proud of you...So proud.

I am so lucky to have such a strong, amazing friend such as you. You are everything, Jammes. You are part of mother Gia, I can see her in you. I love you so much, I don't know what I would do without you. You are my rock, my Jammes. I don't know how to say this in words...I just know what I feel.

I love you.

~Little Lotte

XOXOXOXO
Little Lotte chapter 1 . 5/30/2006
I love you too, Jammes. Your the greatest friend ever! I love you and I love this story. Its really wonderful. I love you!

~Little Lotte
Phantomess785 chapter 1 . 5/30/2006
Ooh, a very promising start. I liek it. Please keep going.