Reviews for Ralon's Revenge
BollywoodRocks chapter 1 . 7/29/2008
This was great!
Akiko Rivers chapter 1 . 2/1/2008
hahahahaha, long live there majesties! and the Lion! lol, i loved this little commentary here..."But why is it always me?”

“Because you are the most wonderful. Go get Edmund to help you. Then, when you are ready, meet me in the field.” my words...


"Cuz you're awesome. Now shut up and go get Eddy. I'm sure he'd love to help you. And then to the fields."

"Would you like tea and toast to?"

"Yes, if you can wrangle it."

...okay, yes this time i am hyper. ;P
InactiveNotUsed chapter 1 . 12/22/2007
This is a lovely sweet story, and is very much in the mould of C. ' own vision of Narnia - he doesn't really describe the battles, and you manage to do that here by simply not having a battle at all!

The idea that Susan's suitors would reject her based on "instability" is a great one, and is one which really highlights just how shallow most of them would be. The dialog at the beginning shows that Ralon isn't a nice guy (a bit smarmy and lecherous) and we see this carried throughout the story.

Throughout the story the dialog is good and the various characters are well-handled and excellently-drawn. This is a very nice, simple, direct little tale which is a pleasure to read.

Well done!
FadedxReality chapter 1 . 9/5/2007
I enjoyed reading this story immensely and I loved the ending! Quite a different take on the normal Susan/suitor stories. Great job!

And I also wanted to say thank you for adding my story to your alerts. )
lickitysplit chapter 1 . 6/12/2006
What a fun one-shot. I enjoyed reading it immensely.
elecktrum chapter 1 . 6/11/2006
“She did a good job, too,” murmured Peter wickedly.


This was great - a nice twist on the usual Susan-and-the-suitor theme.
almostinsane chapter 1 . 6/11/2006
Great story!
Capegio chapter 1 . 6/10/2006
Oh, it's lovely! A right little adventure packaged up in a oneshot. Your writing style is simplistic and beautiful, and I could really hear many of the lines you gave the Pevensies. Quite in-character. I luffed it. :)