Reviews for Adrift in a World
Rakaan chapter 16 . 1/29
I'm a bit tired of everyone in this dimension too. You have all the characters alternate between feeling comfortable enough with him to joke around with him, prank, etc, then in the same breath turn around and all but accuse him of being the second coming of the Anti-Christ. It's a bit annoying.
FlyingLovegood123 chapter 24 . 1/27
I totally get the whole age thing-trust me, something similar happened with me. But this story is still fantastic, and I'm looking forwards to more! Thank you SO much for updating, and happy writing!
Village-Mystic chapter 24 . 1/27
Okay, so if you do plan to do some rewriting - a little more exposition on the medical care? Is Harry still walking around with a bone stuck in his arm? Fan fiction should make sense, but it doesn't have to be perfect. It is equally possible for you to continue the plot from her with selective missing scene flashbacks, as it is for you to start a 2.0 if you need more time to think about where the plot will go from here. My preference is crossover characters, even AU crossover rather than original characters.
Village-Mystic chapter 23 . 1/26
I want to be able to comment on your next chapter - so I'm going to answer your author's note from that chapter here. Actually, there does appear to be a plot here. The story also includes a lot of tour elements... but you set up several things or seemed to tie them together.
1) I appears that you knew all along that you would be bringing Harry's version of Sirius into the story
2) Harry has worked hard so that his alternate family members would be safer but he's powerful not omniscient. This follows from him changing the plans skillfully, but still being overwhelmed. He's been on a story arc learning to trust the experience of some of the adults, even if some of the other adults seem to discuss things to death.
3) You gave something to Sirius but took something away - resulting i angst for all, but still Harry is in a better position.
4) Harry hasn't met this world's version of Luna or Hermione - that's too possible love interests
5) All though some of the set up and delivery in early chapters seemed either convenient or inscrutible, it wasn't horribly so. We know that Harry exchanged him self for Luna, but hadn't got far in terms of a more than friends relationship.
6) Several of your chapters have had more than one twist - that's actually a good thing when you have so many characters - they all want to do something - and many of them wlll
7) I recommend that you add in a few more flashbacks as you move forward, but move forward.
Decide if this other group is another crossover of a pastiche of let's say Steed and Emma Peel - or Saphire and Steel, or Torchwood, etc. and plan the plot forward from here rather than starting over... or at least allow readers to read forward with the new chapters without significant plot changes.
Village-Mystic chapter 22 . 1/26
The possible third side who could be pastiched from a large number of other crossovers or be characters from the HP verse is interesting - as are some of the other plot twists in this chapter. Glad Harry can improvise, and Sirus' spell helped him be in less pain and make it easier to act.
Village-Mystic chapter 19 . 1/26
This was not expected. Curious how it will play out.
Village-Mystic chapter 18 . 1/26
A most unexpected twist.
Village-Mystic chapter 15 . 1/26
Well, that's a reveal to anyone who knows the prophesy, even if none of the adults were able to read "Collin's" lips.
Village-Mystic chapter 14 . 1/26
The time frame was a little difficult to follow i this chapter, but I got the basic points. HP needs to eat regularly, and he hasn't been eating at all.
Village-Mystic chapter 13 . 1/26
It seems like none of these wizards are good at making plans or communicating what plans they have. It's like sending a hoard of rockstars at the problem, when you probably need the band manager or a Hufflepuff.
Village-Mystic chapter 12 . 1/26
Very good and complex set of memories. Some of which seem perhaps fleshed out as missing scenes that you came up with?
Village-Mystic chapter 11 . 1/26
Very complex and fairly well delivered.
Village-Mystic chapter 5 . 1/25
I like that you are developing this slowly over the summer. Not even time yet to see if Hermione exists or is in the school. So many other things to adjust to.
Village-Mystic chapter 2 . 1/25
I'm liking the characterization and interactions. I can see with that much pain management it hasn't been a priority for him to see about getting some glasses or his vision corrected. Good descriptions. Couldn't he ask Fawks for tears - they heal?
Guest chapter 19 . 1/23
It was good up til this chapter... Then I lost interest with you bring "canon" Sirius into it. Sorry stopped reading after.
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