|Reviews for Uchiha Problems|
| Sakuraaa chapter 1 . 8/31/2011
*Hits the like button.* Amazing! xD
| Ayame Yoshida chapter 1 . 3/23/2011
But why is it called Kaydin Uchiha? It is probably in the chapter but Im to sick to notice. Ugh
| Ana chapter 80 . 12/12/2009
Hi! I love your story and i think that you have a a gift for writting. I also like long storys cause they are so involving.. Could you please write something about Sakura and Itachi? Thank you.
| Lune chapter 13 . 1/14/2009
When I saw the summary I thought this will truly be an interesting story. With an enviable length, original plot, and one of my favorite pairings, it seemed I found a gold mine; however reality proved different.
Sometimes more is less and less is more. Like many others, you have a habit of rushing into scenes. Characters blurt out long narratives of information, cues attempt to detail actions and settings, and characterization is nearly lacking. When seeking to explain something stating it bluntly or even at all, often demeans the quality of the writing. Using imagery, creating moods and settings, and create a distinctive personality for characters through little things such as narrowing eyes and tapping fingers give a story life and often express a lot more than if you state it. For example, let's say I want it to be known that Sakura is a jounin in ANBU, whose parent's were murdered and feels as though she isn't strong enough. Instead of saying that all in a narrative or in one paragraph explaining it so, let it be known by the reader through your way of writing as so:
Unshed tears shone in green eyes, the dying sunset reflecting of those somber surfaces. Hands clenched the material of a red shirt as memories swamped her. Oka-san...Otou-san.. A mournful sigh escaped her lips, limbs feeling leaden, as though the world itself sat upon her shoulders. I'm sorry, I couldn't... I wasn't... The thoughts swirled in head accusingly, voices mocking her failures. First Sasuke and now this. A sob choked off in her throat. She would not cry! She had to be stronger than that! They were depending on her, vacant eyes demanding justice. Her fists clenched tighter nails digging into her skin so her palm bled. Determination filled her and she stook shakily, fighting off her weariness. She would do it. She would avenge them. Brushing away pink locks, she slipped the white cat mask over her face and disappeared. I will be strong. I promise. You will have justice.
This is lengthier than stating it, but it also tells a lot mroe to the reader, is entertaining, and adds depth to the writing. Also, you have to mind your phrasing, various times I thought to myself if English was your first language as some phrasing you used left the meaning unclear.
| pinkstainedcheeks chapter 11 . 6/5/2008
Sakura had said " so if you would worry about yourself then you can worry about me but if you worry about yourself I’m sending you to mind therapy"
what does that mean, exactly?
and why did she run out of the house?
| pinkstainedcheeks chapter 10 . 6/3/2008
| pinkstainedcheeks chapter 1 . 6/2/2008
is Sakura rich in here or something?
and what is the matter with Eke?
who or what is Eke?
| sailor winx chapter 80 . 2/10/2008
(claps) i don't know what to say except this was an awsome story. the best one i have ever read. and it breaks my heart it's my it finshed.
other than that i am speechless.
| naruto-kun7 chapter 27 . 2/1/2008
omg sorry i really havnt reviewed but i just cant stop reading! love long stories! they go into so much detail and its nice to know what the little moments are! ok im done i have to keep readin... Ja ne! and if you dont mind me asking what child are we talkin about with tenten and neji i dont remember a child of that dicription?
| emk2617 chapter 15 . 1/14/2008
| trish chapter 2 . 1/8/2008
You really should stop with the transition codes.
You lost my attention when I kept seeing those..
Therefore I don't want to keep reading /
It's not a script for a movie.
It's rather annoying -.-
It would've been 100x better if you write it out.
| gaarasgirl12552 chapter 80 . 1/5/2008
An amazing story. I loved every chapter. I will always remember this story and reccomend it to others.
| Romance is Me chapter 80 . 12/31/2007
omg... its done! sad... but hey..
wen something starts... it has to end...right?
good luck to ur other stories! ill be reading em.. till then.. byes :]
| Babykat570 chapter 80 . 12/31/2007
| kzqueen chapter 53 . 12/31/2007
This was an interesting story, but it was long and drawn out. Many of the chapters were not needed; they only added length and, to me, seemed like a waste of time, millibytes of space, and, for me, a bottle of asprin and new glasses. (The ones I had were worn out with all that reading.)
But overall I think this was a good enough story!