Reviews for Far Flung Hope: More than Meets the Eye
C chapter 1 . 9/4/2008
A great deal of grammatical issues. Read a dictionary, read a thesaurus and come back when you realize there is more than one synonym for "war".
Whispatchet chapter 2 . 5/15/2008
From what I could tell, this a very involved, very complex story. But I feel like it has little flow. It's rather... static.

I also found it very hard to read through all of the words, skipping over most of it to get to a part where there was talking or something else that seemed interesting. I have to agree with everyone else: Spelling Grammar important. I notice it in our RP too.

Vitle? Vital. *nods*

And, I know Transformers and some Halo (which I'm guessing the crossover is of) and even I was a little confused. Background info on Starscream's faction would be good in the first or second chapter, and, a few times I fond myself going, "Hang on, we were talking about Starscream's mob, right? Why does it say Decepticon?"

I'm more than happy to Beta this for you, if you want. Although at this point, I don't think I will be able to read through all the chapters you have up.
The Shadow Syndicate chapter 5 . 5/2/2008
Nice to see an update. Thundercracker and Skywarpawesome!
inukagome15 chapter 3 . 4/24/2008
Glad to see you posted this chapter. Looking forward to the next one. ;)
inukagome15 chapter 1 . 4/22/2008
Interesting...very interesting. I have a question though: What is this story about exactly? Could you give me a proper summary? The one you provided for this story isn't enough and I don't understand much of it. In fact, having never read or watched Transformers (unless you count the 2007 movie), I'm not too sure of anything.

Anyway, this is an interesting story but I need more of a back story to this. By the way, is it all right if I edit what you sent to me? That way, I can clear up anything that is wrong. I'll be posting a review on the second chapter, too, as soon as I finish it.
The Sithspawn chapter 2 . 8/12/2007
Great story! But chapter two is need of a beta ASAP!:(

Lots of gramatical and spelling mistakes, some sentences are very vague and some don't make sense.

If you and your beta are having trouble, I caould go through it for you, no problem. Just send it to me as a doc file and I'll edit it:) Send to the email address in my profile:)

Anyway, even if you don't want my help, update soon! Cause I want to know what happens next:)
Scriptseeker2000 chapter 2 . 3/31/2007
Just wanted to give you encouragment on this fic since you have done the same for me on mine. I usually have rewrite my chapters three times before I'm comfortable with it. Even after that I still have tons of grammer and spelling mistakes. So don't lose hope.

I'm glad you decided to try your own fic and feel free to contact me for help. Although I must admit my knowledge is limited on the characters in this story. Also don't forget about that fic I said we could work on in the future. With your knowledge and my writing skills it will be seriously bad ass.
Cole Von Doom aka Belthazor chapter 2 . 3/29/2007
This piece a crap sucks! and what it sucks that it took you like last year to make two damn chapters. Guess your lazy!
Thug-4-Less chapter 2 . 3/27/2007
Glad to see you're still fighting the good fight.

There were grammatical and spelling errors fairly regularly throughout the story. I would be a little more careful with the editing in the future. It makes the story look a little less polished than I'm sure you would like.

When certain characters are thinking you have the words in quotation marks as though they are actually physically speaking. It is a tad confusing.

I commend you on the massive plot you have going here. You seem to be keeping it all together and that's not an easy thing to do. I'll be adding it to the C2 now. Welcome to the club.
Tristar chapter 1 . 3/21/2007
First of all I'd like to thank you for reviewing my story.

Now I am going to review yours.

A few minor problems I saw that can both be easly ignored and corrected. For one the spelling of Cyclonis is actually Cyclonus. And the spelling of Quintessons. Aside from that it's intresting story. So Forerunners are also the Vok? Unless your ignoring Beast Wars. Good story though I wish you'd continue it.
covered in blood'n gore chapter 1 . 11/2/2006
going good you should tell bombsquad about this so he can put it in his c2 group.
Thug-4-Less chapter 1 . 8/28/2006
First I'd like to say, once again, that the concept of introducing the Transformers fandom into FFH is very exciting. The execution of it could have been much more polished. I suggest you get a Beta to help you iron out the wrinkles.

The title of the story is a bit over-the-top. I'd go with something simpler. The synopsis is also a bit too long-winded. Whenever it's cut off in mid-sentence you know its overlong. I'd go with something shorter that describes what the story's about. Something like," At the height of the Coalition-Covenant War a new threat emerges." Or something to that effect. Direct, to the point, and just titillating enough for a new reader to say," Hmm, that sounds like it might be a good read. " Or something less lame.

Line breaks are a good thing. I think something is screwed up with Fanfiction's line break link so just center align something. I like to use, and I stole this from someone else, the 'x' line break to denote changes in perspective, time, etc.

Lastly, I'd like to say that you should give more detailed descriptions of the Transformers and the vehicles they can turn into. And why they're still using Transformed-states modeled after Terran vehicles. I'm not asking for detailed stats but something to give me an idea of what they look like would be appreciated.

I'll be keeping an eye on your story and if you need any tips/advice/etc. just PM me or drop a line in the forum. Hopefully BombSquad will arise from the dead one of these days. Heh.

Keep plugging away, SpartanCommander, you'll get there.