|Reviews for When She Smiles|
| Guest chapter 5 . 10/5/2017
I don't usually review things, but I absolutely had to this time. This is by far the best fan fiction I have ever read. The flow of the story and the unveiling of the characters and circumstances is fantastic. The subtle ways it reveals where in the timeline of the original series it takes place was done flawlessly. The writing itself is above and beyond standard fan fiction levels. This is a short story that I'd be happy to read even without any connection to the Evangelion universe. Standing ovation. Well done.
| ecstatic chapter 4 . 7/23/2017
I just wanna take the time to let you know how much I love and appreciate this story because I've never read a asushin/post- instrumentality story quite like this one. Not that they're bad or anything, but it's quite a change of pace, especially because it never occurred to me that it's entirely plausible for Asuka to "lose her mind," for lack of better words, after the whole ordeal. So I just want to applaud you for such a story that explores Asuka's psyche AND, on top of that, involves one of her biggest fears. Amazing job. Definitely one of my favorite Eva fanfics to date.
| Guest chapter 1 . 5/28/2017
This is garbage, you fucking idiot.
| COBRASTEVE chapter 5 . 4/14/2016
I gotta say, for what talent you have...what a dark morbid non-ended story. I see what enormous potential was here and this just doesn't measure up. It stopped but didn't end. I wonder if this is a sarcastic style or you're really a jerk or something. So much talent though...
| Casper Finch chapter 1 . 8/14/2015
I apologise, if my initial comment was not coherent, although, in case you are, understandably, confused, by "protective", I meant that Shinji was able to formulate thoughts, and opinions, in regards to Asuka's condition, and that he was, also, able to provide for her, physically, psychologically, and verbally.
As for your author's note, I've noticed that, as someone who claims that their readers are unintelligible, you cannot spell, "criminally", properly, can you?
| Casper M. Finch chapter 1 . 8/14/2015
I apologise, if I did not get my message across, in my initial connect. By "protective", I meant that you were portraying Shinji, in a light, that assumes that he is aware of his own purpose, in life, and how he feels, in regards to particular situations, to the extent, that he does not hesitate, to provide for Asuka, physically, psychologically, and verbally, and, to the extent, that he is able to form coherent opinions, in regards to Asuka's condition.
I would, also, like to note that you refer to people, that are on "level four", according to your claims, as "criminaly stupid", despite the fact that you do not seem to be able to spell the word, "criminally", correctly.
| Casper M. Finch chapter 1 . 8/14/2015
I found your cliff notes, and "proofing", quite offensive, despite the fact that I am at "level one", according to you. Your characters, and, in particular, Shinji are quite "out of character", although I assume that you recreated Shinji, turning him in to a protective figure, because you have inserted yourself in to Asuka's character, and, like Asuka, that is who you wish Shinji was. I was contemplating reading the rest of this fanfiction, but your author's note has appalled me, due to its condescending tone, and transparent belittlement.
| lose chapter 1 . 7/24/2015
So uh... I did figure out the 'twist' about a third of the way into the story, and my mind was completely blown. The lines of dialogue that I read before I figured it out completely gained a new meaning and I immediately scrolled back up to piece everything together in my mind once again. Wow, what a brilliant idea, and the execution was brilliant as well. The rest of the story is also A writing, but this chapter as it stands alone, is one of my favorite things I've read on the site.
Also, the author's note for the first chapter was hilarious!
| John Spangler chapter 1 . 1/25/2015
I've loved every single part of this story. It's sweet, well written and touching. Thank you for having written it.
| YoungBoch chapter 5 . 1/9/2015
Whoa, I'm still alive.
Regardless, I went on a binger for the sake of nostalgia the last few nights, and re-read a few stories from years past. This one only vaguely rung a bell, but it was well worth the read. I think you would agree when I say that the first chapter would have been an amazing one-shot had you left it alone, but that's not to say that this story wasn't good. Quite the opposite, it's (in my opinion) the best thing you've written. I can tell you went way out of your way to make the reader uncomfortable with the writing style as to portray the insanity in Asuka, as well as the building mental breakdown in Shinji and Misato. When this started in chapter 2, I was very disappointed, because I thought it was just who you'd become as a writer... yeah, I was clearly wrong. Well played, well played.
I believe you know the bulk of my stories, and you know angst is my strong suit. This story, though, hurt the heart. The ending wouldn't have been half as sad if Asuka just hung herself. Asuka realized she hated herself, Shinji turned into a husk of a person, Misato just became weak. Beautifully done, Fresh C. I hope you kept up writing throughout the years.
| FelipeFritschF chapter 5 . 10/28/2014
Damn, dude. This was exquisitely well-written. Your characterization of a broken Asuka with the lingering possible effects on a seemingly "normal" post-instrumentality world is something I haven't seen given attention to in Eva fanfics before. Truly magnificent.
Yet, I can't help but feel mad at Shinji. He spent the better part of his recent years crying in everybody's shoulder, and why? Because of the girl he refused to give a shoulder to cry herself. He didn't need to love her, to sacrifice anything for her. All he had to do was held her honestly and tell her it was gonna be alright, even if he didn't believe it himself. Asuka was just a scarred girl who didn't want to be alone.
Much like EoE itself, the ending was somewhat open-ended, and (Anno is smirking st me now) truly a shock after getting my hopes up. Still, it feels somewhat rushed. They went out of their way to help her and Asuka is still basically the same, just more stable? Shinji was sure he loved her with every inch of his heart but now he's just not sure? I realize not living his whole life for her sake is a valid point, but you almost made it seem like what happened to her didn't matter at all. Nonetheless, this was one of best Eva fics I've ever read, and I tip my metaphorical hat to you, sir.
| Sal chapter 5 . 9/4/2014
Excuse me while I wallow away in my own appreciation for this finely driven piece of fiction. You gave emotional substance, self realization integrity, and riveting characteristic development. Though we see most of this from Shinjis' POV, we see what other external forces and main characters maintain and provide to the story in their own path to self discovery. The beginning to the end was imperfect perfection as per say and I mean that in the most positive way I can describe in literal sense. I appreciate that we're left with an open minded ending of continuation, it feels very Eva-esque and realistic to be frank. Great job and many thanks for your thought pondering and exhilarating input into the Eva fanfic fan base.
| AnonOne chapter 1 . 8/5/2014
Clever. I got it near the end, but very clever. It sort of puts an unusual perception on someone who is mentally ill.
| yclui chapter 5 . 10/2/2013
Oh. My. God.
Holy crap, am i glad to have read this. No other fic has ever just GRABBED me and refused to let go like this one.
Thanks for writing this.
| Flynn58 chapter 5 . 9/18/2013
And that works for it. This story was never meant to be happy. It was never meant to have that fantasy ending. But it has a real ending. I guess that's not what we expect when we read Evangelion fanfiction. We expect a Peggy Sue, or an Alternate Universe fic which ends up with Shinji and Asuka shirking off their baggage and living happily ever after. But life doesn't work like that. We have to accept that life is not going to be full of happy endings. But at least those endings felt real.