Reviews for Finding a Hero
Seal1 chapter 32 . 7/9/2011
I've been in a mood to read some HP LOTR crossovers since I saw the Extended release movies in the theater again a few weeks ago. Unfortunately, I was so confused by this story that I was a bit unsatisfied. Stories need to have a linear progression so that the reader can follow them, stating in the author note that you should ask questions if you you don't understand the story is a cheap way to clear up misunderstandings. In addition, you desperately need a beta. I took some time to look at your more recent fics thinking that your writing style may have matured since this is a bit of an older story, and to see if you had a beta. No beta was acknowleged in any of the fics I skimmed, which leads me to believe that you don't have one. Finding one that will clean up numerous grammatical and spelling errors and point out plot holes will make your stories that much better.

Oh, and it's spelled epilogue, not epilog. is a really good reference site for spelling.
i heart imortals chapter 1 . 5/24/2011
i just tride to read this story and it made no sence. in chapter 1 it had the elf and then ****poff****you have hermione granger , not knowing who she is **confused** so really you should start putting intrest in your writing or get a beta to talk you throgh it and marybe you would get good reviews evan people to read the hole should look at others writing and try to do somthing like them
owl3764 chapter 32 . 5/2/2011
Wow Yemi,

You’re a BETA! How on earth?

I have just ‘tried’ to read this story and only got through part way of the second chapter when I had to stop.

I went to your author page to have a read up on you, and see you have over 200 stories to your name with the fewest amount of reviews I’ve ever seen. Ever wondered why?

Your writing skills are so poor it’s amazing you can even speak the language; let alone trying to write it.

You make all the obvious know mistakes continuously… and you say you’re trying to better your writing skills? Obviously you are not. You’re on-line, there are dozens of grammar sites on the net… do a little research; plus all the online dictionaries.

Use a writing program, like MSWord or the free OpenOffice—make sure you turn on the spell-checker AND grammar checker—you really need both. Without the correct grammar a reader has to sit and re-read a sentence a couple of time—at least—to try to work out what the author is trying to say. Just the lack of a comma in the right place can make a sentence read completely differently.

Your, you’re; there, their, they’re; too, to; its, it’s; then, than—All mistakes you make continually.

Hell… maybe you can even pick up some of the other skills, such as using a comma, semicolon, em & en dashes and so forth… if you really are trying to improve your writing skills.

From your spiel on how you like to give criticism to others—you have no room to talk at all. You really have no idea at all on how to write.

I may not ‘write’ myself, and generally never write a negative review, but after the crap you wrote on your home page about ‘how to tell others to write’, I think this is only fair.

I doubt you will leave this up for others to read—it seems you have no negative reviews—at least on this story, and on the final page of this story you refer to more reviewers than there are reviews, not that I noticed until I went looking. The reason I started this story was there weren’t any ‘bad’ reviews.

The truth is, this story is utter rubbish and future readers should know that. That’s why I’m leaving this at the end of the story—where I usually check—rather than where I couldn’t bear to read another word.

I’m not saying you haven’t got imagination enough to write, which I don’t and probably never will have. I’m saying you have no aptitude to put your story into words. Maybe with a bit of study you could. Maybe you’ll never be able to see that the style you currently write in is not worth reading.

You said you’d rather reviews than a PM—well you’ve got one—otherwise I would have sent this privately. Now let’s see if you’re brave enough to leave this up.

Sorry to be so bluntly honest… but you need it.
Glitter Poisoned My Blood chapter 1 . 12/31/2009
... Isn't it kind of hypocritical to be saying she'll get flames considering that you're putting yourself into your own story?

cheshire-kitten88 chapter 32 . 6/18/2009
Hi, having just read the entire story, I think it was an interesting idea, and a far more plausible crossover idea than many I've come across. I'll definitely be looking for sequels to this.

1 tiny gripe though, that comes up in this story & others. You seem to consistently use the word defiantly (meaning resisting) instead of definitely (meaning certainly).

I'm guessing this is a spell-checker problem, since defiantly is automatically suggested first by most programs since it comes first alphabetically.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 32 . 12/26/2008
this was an amazing story, and I'm sad its over. It always had me rolling in laughter. I can't wait to read the sequel, let me know when you post it.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 31 . 12/26/2008
I love Leggie!
Valinor's Twilight chapter 30 . 12/26/2008
Ooh, snape is in the house.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 29 . 12/23/2008
great update, I loved it.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 28 . 12/22/2008
great update. loved it.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 27 . 12/18/2008
lovely update, I enjoyed it.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 26 . 12/18/2008
excellent update, I loved it. Update soon.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 25 . 12/14/2008
great update, I loved it. keep up the good work.
Valinor's Twilight chapter 18 . 9/7/2008
great update.
Mikol chapter 17 . 5/14/2008
I think I like this story - a LOT.

Poor oblivious Ron - he never was any good at tact, don't really think he ever will be.

Masterful way of combining the two fandoms smoothly into our world.

Can't wait for the next chapter - it ought to be interesting, to say the least.
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